The Sorting Hat Adventures
by Ferretess xxx
Summary: All of our favorite characters are getting sorted. Will include Trio's time, before, and NextGen canon and noncanon characters.
1. Aberforth Dumbledore

**A/N: Hello, I have been dying to write this for a while now. Lol. So, I'll be sorting already-sorted characters, not next-generation, for now, although I will sort them eventually. This is going to be a very long story. And I'm doing practically every character at one point, but I'll take requests on who to do next, in order they are given. Anyway, hope you enjoy! : ) Oh yeah, bold is the sorting hat talking, italics is the sortee, and regular is, well, regular.  
**

* * *

"Dumbledore, Aberforth!"

A nervous boy with short, auburn, hair walked up to the stool, and put the sorting hat on his head, seeing only black.

**Hmm… you seem like you are very cunning.**

_I don't want to be in Slytherin._

**Ah… I don't think you are quite right for it anyway.**

_Okay._

**What house do you want to be in?**

_I get to choose?_

**No, but your choice is considered.**

_Hmm, well, I'd like to be in Gryffindor, like Albus._

**Ah, Albus. Your brother? Very smart young man.**

_Yeah, I know._

**I see you hear that a lot, and you're jealous.**

_A bit, I guess._

**More than a bit.**

_Er, anyway, can I be in Gryffindor?_

**Hmm… you are quite brave. Not smart enough for Ravenclaw.**

_Hey!_

**It's true.**

_Hmph._

**You are loyal, but not enough for Hufflepuff.**

_So, Gryffindor, then?_

**I do believe it would be-**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

Aberforth smiled, and walked to the Gryffindor table. They were clapping, and some, like Albus, cheering. Hogwarts would be wonderful.

* * *

**A/N: So, do you think having the sorting, than a bit of reaction, is good? Let me know in a review please, and also if you like the story. : )**


	2. Alastor Moody

**A/N: I wanted to update again. Lol. : ) (For my other stories, I updated once every 5-11 days recently, now I'm updating this twice in one day! :P )**

* * *

"Moody, Alastor!"

Alastor Moody walked up to the stool, and put on the hat.

**It's been a while since I've seen someone so brave.**

_Well, it comes naturally._

**Funny, as your parents were both Hufflepuffs. But it's so painfully obvious.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

Alastor took off the hat, and walked off triumphantly to the Gryffindor table. He sat near two other first years who looked friendly, and he decided that this would be a pretty decent seven years.

* * *

**A/N: Really short, I know. But Moody is just too obviously a Gryffindor. Lol. But I think I'll update this story at least once or twice more today, since the chapters are so short. Review please! : )**


	3. Albus Dumbledore

**A/N: Probably no one will have even read the second chapter by the time I post this, as it's only been a minute as of now. (At the most!)**

* * *

"Dumbledore, Albus!"

Albus walked up and put on the hat, feeling just a slight bit nervous, from all the whispers. Oh, why did his father have to do that?

**Dumbledore, eh? I heard about your father.**

_Yes, but don't judge me on his actions._

**Don't worry, I won't. You are not a Slytherin, anyway.**

_What's wrong with Slytherins?_

**Nothing, why?**

_The way you said it made it seem like you had something against the house._

**I don't, but most people do. They think it's evil.**

_Well, I'm not that ignorant, you know._

**Yes, I know. You would fit in well in Ravenclaw.**

_Okay, I'd go there._

**But Hufflepuff… well, it'd work, but it's not the best for you.**

_So, Ravenclaw or Gryffindor? Many people think those are the best houses._

**Yes… Gryffindor, you'd fit in well. In fact, if it weren't for all the whispers, I doubt you'd be nervous an ounce right now. I think Gryffindor would suit you well.**

_Alright._

**GRYFFINDOR!**

* * *

Everyone in the Great Hall was thoroughly surprised. Shouldn't a Dumbledore be in Slytherin? After what his father did? But no, Albus was in Gryffindor. After a second, the Gryffindors realized they should clap, thus, they did. Albus felt relieved at this bit of acceptance. Soon enough, he'd prove that he's nothing like his father…

* * *

**A/N: Hope you like it! Review please! : )**


	4. Alice Toevs Longbottom

**A/N: Here's Alice!**

* * *

"Toevs, Alice!"

A nervous girl with a round face and black hair walked up to the stool, and put on the hat.

**Nervous, are you? Don't worry, even most Gryffindors are.**

_Really?_

**Yes.**

_So I could be a Gryffindor?_

**Is that what you want?**

_Yes, my dad was in Gryffindor. My mom was in Ravenclaw, though._

**Well, I don't think you are fit for either of those houses.**

_I'm not?_

**No.**

_Am I going to be in Slytherin? I really don't want that._

**Well, I suppose I could put you in Slytherin…**

_No!_

**But you are perfect for-**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

Alice let out a sigh of relief. She was not in Slytherin. And Hufflepuff looked very inviting, even though they looked a bit like bees. At least the colors matched her hair.

* * *

**A/N: This one took me a while. You try writing and talking to your best friend on face book… and looking up Alice's maiden name. (it's not canon, as it was never specified.)**


	5. Andromeda Black

**A/N: Anyone notice all the A's? Well, I got the people off the fan fiction character list, so they're in ABC order. For now… *evil laugh*.**

* * *

"Black, Andromeda!"

Andromeda walked up to the stool, and put on the hat, feeling about as nervous as most do.

**Ah… a Black.**

_Yes, a Black._

**I see you have a fiery temper… Bellatrix does as well.**

_I've been on the wrong end of it before. So has poor Sirius._

**I doubt your cousin would want pity.**

_You don't even know him! And get on with the sorting!_

**I am not ordered around by 11 year olds!**

_I am 11 and a half!_

**Halfs don't matter once you turn, what, 7?**

_DO NOT INSULT ME, YOU, YOU… HAT!_

**Good one.**

_Thanks._

**I was being sarcastic.**

_Oh, just sort me already!_

**Hmm… you are not a Gryffindor…**

_I know I'm not so brave..._

**And no, not Ravenclaw. You are smart, but not Ravenclaw-smart.**

_What's the difference?_

**It's huge. And you could be a Hufflepuff, or a Slytherin.**

_I don't care which one._

**Well, I think I know which suits you best. Ah, yes.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

Andromeda happily took the hat off. It wouldn't be fun sharing a house with Bellatrix, but she hated that hat. Besides, at least someone would stand up for her here. If not any friends, at least teachers. She'd always considered herself an optimist.

* * *

**A/N: That one took ages. Lol. I had to take a shower, so… yeah. Review please! : )**


	6. Arthur Weasley

**A/N: the first Weasley. : )**

* * *

"Weasley, Arthur!"

Arthur Weasley, a tall boy with flaming red hair and freckles, walked nervously to the stool and placed the hat on his head.

**Hmm… just like all Weasleys.**

_What do you mean?_

**Impossible to sort. I mean, you're all brave, loyal, and cunning, and some are smart.**

_Some?_

**Yes. Unlike you.**

_Oi!_

**Just kidding. But you aren't a Ravenclaw.**

_Okay._

**Or a Slytherin.**

_Phew… I would hate to be in the same house as Malfoy._

**You know him?**

_Unfortunately, we met on the train._

**I see… Lucius is a rather dark boy. **

_But can we stop discussing him? I want to be sorted._

**Yes, yes. You are not a Hufflepuff. I mean, you're loyal and all, but not Hufflepuff-loyal.**

_What…? Well, at least I'm in Gryffindor._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

Arthur cheerfully gave the hat to McGonagall (he was the last to be sorted) and walked to the Gryffindor table. Ever since he was little, he'd dreamed of being in Gryffindor. Not to mention that cute girl over there…

* * *

**A/N: Yes, the girl is Molly. Review please! : )**


	7. Astoria Greengrass

**A/N: Astoria Greengrass. The girl never mentioned, but married to a main character. :P**

* * *

"Greengrass, Astoria!"

**Ah, Greengrass. Related to Daphne?**

_Yes, I am. She's in Slytherin._

**I know, I put her there.**

_Well, I know that!_

**Do you now?**

_Yes, I do!_

**I see.**

_Hmph._

**I don't think you are a Gryffindor.**

_Oh… okay. Well, I'd only be disowned by mom anyway..._

**Possibly. You aren't a Ravenclaw. You aren't quite smart enough.**

_Uh… alright._

**Hmm… Slytherin would go with your family. But I don't judge by that.**

_Good._

**Do you like your family?**

_Well, I like Dad, he's fair. But Mom's a bit crazy. All that pure-blood stuff… so I don't like her that much, but she isn't abusive or anything. And Daphne is a mix of them, so she's okay. But I wish I had a sister more like me, you know?_

**Yes… long rant there.**

_Well, I'm sure I'm blushing._

**Ah. Well,back on track, you are a bit cunning.**

_Okay…_

**But… yes…**

_What house am I in?_

**Hmm… loyalty… yes.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

Astoria smiled a little. She wouldn't be around any family, but she could always make new friends. Hufflepuff did look very inviting. She made sure not to look at the Slytherin table, and Daphne's furious face. Nothing could ruin her blissful mood.

* * *

**A/N: Nowhere in canon did it say Astoria is in Slytherin. And while it's unlikely for Draco to marry a Hufflepuff, oh well. He could've changed some. And I must say, from this interpretation of her, I really like Astoria. Probably where Scorpius got all his niceness that you see in fanfictions... review please! : )**


	8. Alicia Spinnet

**A/N: wow, there's a ton of A's in HP. Lol**

* * *

"Spinnet, Alicia!"

_Not Slytherin, please!_

**Why not?**

_Because I don't want to be there!_

**Hmm… you are quite cunning…**

_NO!_

**But I think you are also smart…**

_Not Slytherin!_

**And loyal… yes, too loyal for Slytherin…**

_YES!_

**But not enough so for Hufflepuff… and not really Ravenclaw material either… quite brave… yes…**

_Yay!_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

Alicia was so glad to not be in Slytherin, she nearly forgot to take off the hat. Nearly. She laughed a little on her way to the Gryffindor table. Hopefully her clumsiness would go away this year.

* * *

**A/N: Review please!**


	9. Angelina Johnson

**A/N: Here she is. The one and only… Angelina! Lol**

* * *

"Johnson, Angelina!"

**Hmm, there is no doubt.**

_For what?_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

Surprised at the short length of her sorting, Angelina got up and went to the Gryffindor table. They looked friendly enough…

* * *

**A/N: I know it's short, but Draco can't be the only one with a 5-second sorting. Review please**


	10. Audrey Ryan Weasley

**A/N: Audrey Weasley is finally portrayed here. Lol**

* * *

"Ryan, Audrey!"

_Put me in whatever house is best to become the Minister._

**Well, you're ambitious.**

_I know I am, now sort me!_

**Fine. Hmm… not so loyal. You'd save your own life over your friend's, but you would sacrifice your life for a true love.**

_Who wouldn't?_

**Many Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs.**

_Oh._

**So… intelligence, yes. Cunning and ambition, you are full of it.**

_So, does this mean I'm in Slytherin? I can't be, though, I'm Muggle-born!_

**Anyone can be in any house if they fit there.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

Hardly any of the Slytherins clapped, since Audrey's Muggle-born. She felt terrible. Why couldn't she just be in Hufflepuff, or even Ravenclaw? Well, there's no escaping.

"It's okay, I'm Muggle-born too." A girl said, at the Slytherin table.

"Really?"

"Yes. I'm Makenzie Stanton. I'm a first year too."

"I'm Audrey Ryan… it's good to stick together." Maybe being a Muggle-born Slytherin wouldn't be quite so bad after all.

* * *

**A/N: Percy had to marry a Slytherin… he pretty much belongs there himself. Review please!**


	11. Anthony Goldstein

**A/N: I know he's hardly mentioned.**

* * *

"Goldstein, Anthony!"

_Hello, hat._

**A student saying hello?**

_Yes._

**Oh, well, uh, hello.**

_What house am I in?_

**Well… not Slytherin.**

_Okay. I don't think I'm very brave either._

**No… you are, but not enough for Gryffindor.**

_What about Hufflepuff? Or Ravenclaw?_

**You are very loyal. But your intelligence is that of Ravenclaw's. Rowena would love to have you in her house.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

Anthony went to the clapping Ravenclaw table. This would be a good school time. Not only was he in the best house, to him, but blue and bronze were his favorite colors, even before Hogwarts.

* * *

**A/N: review please.**


	12. Augusta Griffin Longbottom

**A/N: the last one for tonight. Augusta Longbottom. More soon, though. Enjoy!**

* * *

"Griffin, Augusta!"

**Ah, yes… I see you are not a Hufflepuff…**

_Why'd you realize that so quickly?_

**You just aren't the type. Nor for Ravenclaw.**

_Okay then._

**I see you are cunning, ambitious, brave, and chivalrous… hard indeed. Lion or snake?**

_Lion._

**I don't know… you are good for Slytherin…**

_I am not!_

**Careful, you said that out loud.**

_Oh, Merlin, no… I'm a possible Slytherin, and now this?_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

Forgetting her embarrassment, Augusta went to the Gryffindor table, relieved to not be a snake.

* * *

**A/N: Review Please!**


	13. Bellatrix Black

**A/N: Here's a chapter. : )**

* * *

"Black, Bellatrix!"

**A Black.**

_You got a problem with that?_

**No, no…**

_You do. Admit it!_

**I do not!**

_Do too, and I will kill you! I know the Unforgivables, I think. You look like a good test subject…_

**You disturb me.**

_YOU DISTURB ME!_

**Er… shall we get on with the sorting?**

_Yes, I need to get this piece of FILTH off me! I just realized, it's touched mudbloods' heads! I might get lice!_

**Shut up!**

_DON'T YOU TELL ME TO SHUT UP!_

**Oh, I will!**

_I WILL KILL YOU, AND BRING YOU BACK JUST TO KILL YOU AGAIN!_

**Ah, threats… a Black family classic.**

_JUST SORT ME YOU NITWIT!_

**Nitwit. Psh. Hmm… not loyal… not too smart… kinda brave… I think you belong in Gryffindor.**

_DON'T YOU DARE!_

**I do dare.**

_IF YOU DO I'LL KILL YOU THREE TIMES!_

**Your threats are empty.**

_ARE NOT!_

**I can read your mind. Anyway,**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

**It's the only place for your sick little mind, besides St. Mungo's.**

* * *

Seething with anger, Bellatrix threw the hat on the ground. "That hat insulted me numerous times, Professor," she hissed to McGonagall as she walked by.

"I know. Your whole conversation was loud enough for the whole Great Hall to hear, Miss Black."

* * *

**A/N: A lot of humor in this one. Lol. Review please!**


	14. Bill Weasley

**A/N: I didn't realize it'd been so long! Anyway, enjoy. : )**

* * *

"Weasley, Willliam!"

**I recognize your name… all the Weasleys were in Gryffindor, except your 82456 greats grandfather, who was in Hufflepuff.**

_Well, thanks for the pressure._

**Ah, you're welcome.**

_I was being sarcastic!_

**I know that!**

_You didn't until I told you!_

**Not true. And I think you'd do well in Slytherin.**

_No!_

**You know you want to be in it.**

_I do not, I want to be in Gryffindor, or at least Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw! Not Slytherin!_

**But it's perfect for you.**

_It is not!_

**I have made my decision.**

_No! Please!_

**I will not change my mind.**

**_GRYFFINDOR!_**

* * *

A stunned, yet relieved, Bill Weasley walked to the Gryffindor table. "That hat is sarcastic. I think it belongs in Slytherin!" he said to a boy he'd met on the train, also at the Gryffindor table.

"It was for me too… glad I'm not the only one."

* * *

**A/N: Kind of an odd chapter. Oh well. : )**


	15. Bartemius Crouch Sr

**A/N: Yikes, it's been a while! :P One reason I hate homework… which I don't usually get much of.**

* * *

"Crouch, Bartemius!"

**I thought we outgrew old times… I mean, Bartemius?**

_It's Barty, and don't make fun of me._

**Alright, alright. What's your dad's first name?**

_Alphalpha._

**Haha. Wow. I remember that poor sap...**

_He's quite rich, actually. And my mom is Gwineta, and my grandfathers are Moraxan and Xsavien, my grandmothers are Blanch-Gertrude and Aleczinya._

**Name troubles?**

_Nah, I like them._

**Strange boy. Not fit for Hufflepuff, by the way. Not one ounce of true loyalty. You think for yourself, and no one else.**

_Isn't that what everyone does?_

**No.**

_Oh. Well, what about Gryffindor? My parents and ancestors were all there._

**You are not fit for Gryffindor in the slightest, Bartytemius.**

_I am a Gryffindor! And don't call me that!_

**I'll just say Crouch then.**

_Fine._

**And you aren't a Gryffindor, Crouch.**

_Ravenclaw then?_

**Hmm… you are quite smart, Crouchy.**

_Hey! And just please, please, please, not Slytherin!_

**Hmm… sorry, Crouch, but you are most certainly only fit for**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

While the Slytherins clapped unenthusiastically, the rest of the tables were surprised. Crouch was a common name in Gryffindor, and the lions had already prepared to clap.

Meanwhile, a fuming, yet more nervous than before, Barty Crouch was walking slowly over to the Slytherin table. This would not be a fun experience. And, oh, what would his parents say?

* * *

**A/N: I know those are wierd names, lol. Blanch-Gertrude and Alphalpha are the only ones I didn't create. They are from my great-grandma and a kid from 'The Little Rascals' movie. Anyway, review please, hope you liked it! : )**


	16. Bartemius Crouch Jr

**A/N: Another chapter!**

* * *

"Crouch, Bartemius Jr.!"

**Crouchy, I see.**

_Don't call me that!_

**What about Bartyemius?**

_NO!_

**I called your father both of those.**

_I don't like my father, so I don't care._

**Wow, not liking your father alone is enough to not be in Slytherin…**

_What!_

**Just kidding. You are not in Gryffindor, by the way, so relax.**

_Good. Not Hufflepuff either, right?_

**Hmm… not Ravenclaw.**

_ANSWER ME!_

**Nah… not Slytherin.**

_NO WAY!_

**I have made my decision.**

_NO!_

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

Relieved, yet irritated, Barty walked over to the Slytherin table. He then realized everyone was looking at him strangely. Not just because he was a first year.

"What?" He snapped at another kid at the Slytherin table.

"You yelled things like 'no' and 'answer me' throughout your sorting…"

"I did not!"

"You did, Bartemius."

* * *

**A/N: review please!**


	17. Blaise Zabini

**A/N: here is another one. : )**

* * *

"Zabini, Blaise!"

**The last one… at last. Literally.**

_Just sort me. You'll be able to get rid of me faster._

**If thoughts could be sneered, you sure would've just now.**

_Just sort me you stupid piece of cloth._

**I am not stupid and I'm not even made of cloth!**

_Whatever. Just sort me._

**Okay. Hufflepuff... maybe. Gryffindor… maybe.**

_No way. No way again._

**I choose the house. Ravenclaw… no. Slytherin… horrifyingly bad for you.**

_I will be in Slytherin!_

**No… you will be in Gryffindor.**

_I will not!_

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

"That hat has a rotten sense of humor." Blaise sneered to a fellow Slytherin, who he knew from their parents' parties, Draco Malfoy.

"I know it does. I wish I could just set it on fire."

"Maybe your father can."

* * *

**A/N: And thus, Draco starts his father obsession… nah, it was started when he was a baby, I'm sure. Lol. Review please! : )**


	18. Cornelius Fudge

**A/N: I keep forgetting to update my stories! This one's kinda funny... Well, hope you enjoy! :)**

* * *

"Fudge, Cornelius!"

**Do you like chocolate?**

_Why does everyone ask me that when they hear my last name?_

**Because your last name is Fudge…?**

_So! No one asks about Dumbledore having anything to do with dumb doors!_

**Dumb doors?**

_Well…_

**Okay… anyway, do you like chocolate?**

_No, I don't like chocolate!_

**You… what!**

_I don't like chocolate!_

**Wow…**

_Just sort me!_

**Um… only Slytherins dislike chocolate…**

_Not true! And shut up about the chocolate!_

**Sheesh… rude much?**

_Just. Sort. Me._

**Eh… I don't know… you aren't brave, smart, cunning, or nice… and your loyalty is not always right.**

_Well, just choose one!_

**I guess the only one that would even come close to working is…**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

Cornelius walked over to the Hufflepuff table. His parents would have no idea how he got here… and so would he.

* * *

**A/N: He's a lot like Zacharias Smith… which is why he's there. Review please!**


	19. Cedric Diggory

**A/N: I'm going to do 2 today, since both aren't very long. :)**

* * *

"Diggory, Cedric!"

**Hmm… you are no Slytherin, that's for sure.**

_Okay… my dad was in Slytherin._

**Well, family doesn't matter. And your mother was in Gryffindor.**

_True. So, what am I?_

**Well, you aren't a Gryffindor either. You are relatively brave, but not enough for Gryffindor…**

_So, Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff?_

**From here, it's obvious, since you are extremely loyal and fair.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

Cedric walked to the Hufflepuff table happily. They looked the most welcoming, that's for sure.

* * *

**A/N: review please!**


	20. Charlie Weasley

**A/N: Here's another one.**

* * *

"Weasley, Charles!"

**I see a Slytherin, that's for sure.**

_No, you don't!_

**I'm pretty sure I do…**

_You don't!_

**Do.**

_Don't!_

**Oh, let's not go there.**

_Don't!_

**Stop.**

_Don't!_

_**SLY-!**_

_No!_

**Anyway, from this brief conversation, I've seen that you are only fit for Gryffindor or Slytherin.**

_Not Slytherin!_

**Why not?**

_Slytherins are evil!_

**If I put you in Slytherin, it would make you suddenly evil?**

_Maybe!_

**Oh, brother…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

Trying to ignore the scowling Slytherins, who might have once been nice, before their sortings, Charlie walked over to the Gryffindor table, to sit beside his brother, Bill.

* * *

**A/N: review please! : )**


	21. Draco Malfoy

**A/N: this story seems to be coming fast… lol. : ) Oh yeah, I'm doing this one instead of the one I had planned for next because of a request from geegee20.**

* * *

"Malfoy, Draco!"

_Just do it quickly._

**It's too obvious:**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

Smugly, Draco walked over to the Slytherin table. Father would be so proud…

* * *

**A/N: this one was short (it's short in canon) so I'll do another one today. Maybe two… ;)**


	22. Cho Chang

**A/N: Here's the next. : )**

* * *

"Chang, Cho!"

**Ah, quite the friendly girl… you'd do well in Hufflepuff.**

_Okay? That was quick._

**Alas, I am not finished!**

_Oh. Carry on then._

**I don't think you are quite fit for Slytherin… no, not at all.**

_Phew…_

**You aren't quite a Gryffindor either. Not that you aren't brave, you are, a bit, but you aren't the right type for Godric… I should know.**

_Yeah, you would know best, I suppose._

**Thank you.**

_You're welcome…? Weird saying that to a hat…_

**Sigh…**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

**You are very smart. Use it wisely.**

* * *

_Did the hat usually say something after the house is yelled out?_ Cho wondered this as she walked to the clapping and cheering Ravenclaw table. It didn't seem like there was enough time… but apparently, there was.

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, one more tonight… hope you liked it! Review please! : )**


	23. Colin Creevey

**A/N: Last one till tomorrow or Thursday! Lol.**

* * *

"Creevey, Colin!"

**Erm… a word of advice: don't stalk people!**

_I don't! What does that even- oh, I know what it means. Never mind! _

**Mm… Muggles teach their kids these things too early, in my opinion.**

_My mom is gone, I don't know her. But my dad is awesome! He's a milkman!_

**Nice. The second one, that is.**

_Yeah! I love milk!_

**Nice. Of course, Slytherins don't like milk…**

_Yes! I would never befriend Harry Potter if I was in Slytherin! Thank you dad for making me love milk!_

**I was kidding… either way, you are no Slytherin. Or a Ravenclaw.**

_Yahoo! Thank the milk god!_

**…What…?**

_The milk god!_

**Sigh…**

_Well… for the love of milk, it's been a whole minute! Sort me!_

**Hmm… this conversation has made it clear:**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**But not to stalk Harry Potter!**

* * *

"Like I'd stalk Harry Potter." Colin said to a fellow first year, after explaining his sorting.

"Yeah… only a girl would."

Secretly, that was exactly what Colin planned to do. Only he didn't realize it was stalking.

* * *

**A/N: I like Colin. I was just playing around with the story. I mean, it's humor for a reason! Review please! :)**


	24. Dean Thomas

**A/N: here I am again! : ) lol**

* * *

"Thomas, Dean!"

**Oh no, you're so tall the hat doesn't quite cover your eyes!**

_So…?_

**You just broke the law!**

_Um… what law?_

**Oh, you have no sense of humor! The Sorting Hat Law, duh! Anway, not a Gryffindor…**

_What!_

**Fine… not a Slytherin.**

_Okay._

**Note the mood change…**

_Um…_

**Not a Ravenclaw.**

_That was random…?_

**Yes, it was.**

_…_

**Hmm… Gryffindor or Hufflepuff?**

_…I don't care._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

_That's a weird hat,_ Dean thought as he walked to the cheering and clapping Gryffindor table. _Not even Mum is that ridiculous…_

* * *

**A/N: review please! I am 97% sure I'll update tomorrow! :D**


	25. Dennis Creevey

**A/N: I'm at my friend's house, so I can just do one chapter while she watches her new show. (she, like, lives for tv. -_-)**

**

* * *

**

"Creevey, Dennis!"

**Hey, do you like milk?**

_Yeah, love it! And plus I love the Giant Squid! I wanna marry her!_

**Her…?**

_Yeah, the Giant Squid is female!_

**Nice…**

Yeah!

**So, you sure don't seem like a Slytherin…**

_Yay!_

**Or a Ravenclaw…**

_Okay…?_

**Or a Hufflepuff…**

_Gryffindor! Alright! Woohoo!_

**Just one word of advice: do not join the Harry Potter fan club with your brother.**

_What!_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**

* * *

**

"Why do think I wouldn't be able to join your fan club?" Dennis asked Colin, sitting at the Gryffindor table.

"I don't know!"

"I'm joining anyway, 'cuz," Colin joined in here, as it was their motto, "Harry Potter is the best!"

* * *

**A/N: The sorting hat said that because they would've had to disband when Umbi-wait, the rating-Um**_**bridge **_**took over. Anyway, review please! : )**


	26. Dolores Umbridge

_**IMPORTANT:**_

Fanfiction won't even let my edits on doc manager come up. If you can read this, you are lucky. Please notify me immediately, with a review or message. I tried to copy and paste the chapter here, so let's see if it worked!

**A/N: Here's another chapter… and it includes Miss Kitty. :P**

**Sorry it took so long, the site wouldn't let me update Harry Potter stories. But from reading Dimcairen's story, her A/N explained how. So, thank you! :) Kind of funny it happened at the chapter you were looking forward to...**

**Oh yeah, let me spread around how you do it: just click on edit like always, then change the url, where it says properties, to content. Fairly simple. :)  
**

* * *

"Umbridge, Dolores!"

**Oh, just one look into your mind is enough to… urg…**

_Shut up you dimwit!_

**I'm just going to sort you.**

_Into what house!_

**I hate answering direct questions like that.**

_Well, answer it anyway! I command you!_

**Since when did you have any power over me? You're an eleven year old human.**

_So?_

**So?**

_Yeah, so!_

**Oh, Merlin... truly an eleven year old.**

_I'm almost twelve!_

**Whatever. Either way, I think you should be sorted before you mess with my mind or something...  
**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

Clearly, the Slytherins hadn't expected Dolores to be in Slytherin. Most Slytherins don't wear big, pink bows in their hair, with pink kitten earrings.

"What are you all looking at?" she yelled to the Slytherin table.

Everyone went back to watching the sorting. She obviously belonged here.

* * *

**A/N: Review please! :)**

**Okay, fanfiction won't let me upload Daphne's chapter. I tried twice, and it didn't upload it. I now remember it saying something about incorrect file types... ah well, I'll just put it here. Hope you don't mind, I'll try and fix it! Stupid glitches... fanfiction is full of them nowadays... i'll have to go to their facebook page and complain... grr...**

* * *

"Greengrass, Daphne!"  
**Oh, you are anything but a Hufflepuff, that's for sure.**  
_Well, good. Not Gryffindor either!_  
**No, you aren't brave at all…**  
_Hmph. Just put me in Slytherin already!_  
**What if I don't? No, let me guess… you'll burn me?**  
_Good idea!_  
**Sigh…**  
_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Kind of short… oh well. Review please! : ) And once again, sorry for the technical difficulties! (if this makes it... :/ )**


	27. Daphne Greengrass

**A/N: Sorry about the long wait! Fanfiction was being evil! But it works now! Woohoo! :D I am itching to update this one again and maybe make a one-shot... since i haven't made one since December. :S**

* * *

"Greengrass, Daphne!"

**Oh, you are anything but a Hufflepuff, that's for sure.**

_Well, good. Not Gryffindor either!_

**No, you aren't brave at all…**

_Hmph. Just put me in Slytherin already!_

**What if I don't? No, let me guess… you'll burn me?**

_Good idea!_

**Sigh…**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Kind of short… oh well. Review please! : )**


	28. Ernie Macmillian

**A/N: Since I'm being evil and lazy at the same time, I have to update. :P I have been doing nothing but my project and reading this week, basically. I went on face book about 10 minutes five out of seven days, and I finished reading the stuff on Story Alert. (Although I'm sure I have more now, I just needed to update this first.) But yeah, I've been busy reading Percy Jackson, and I need the fifth book or I will die. (April Fools, I would only be very anxious.) Anyway, on with the story! :P**

**Oh yeah, this just came back to me: last time I was going to update this, I forgot how to spell Ernie's last name. So I looked it up on Harry Potter Wiki, which is actually pretty accurate. Then we went somewhere or ate dinner or something, so I never updated. :/**

**And I just got distracted again while looking it up. I accidentally clicked on Youtube instead of HP Wiki, so… yeah. I watched one video, and I didn't even watch the whole thing, and I commented on someone's channel. So… don't kill me! :S**

**And gosh, such a long A/N! :/  
**

* * *

"Macmillian, Ernest!"

**Mm hmm… You are quite difficult to sort, with qualities of every house.**

_Well… that's a good thing, right?_

**I suppose it depends on your point of view.**

_Well… brave, smart, loyal, friendly, ambitious, sly… seem good to me._

**Nice to know. Also nice to know you didn't name 'evil' for Slytherin. Most Gryffindors would.**

_So, I'm not in Gryffindor?_

**Though not for that reason, you aren't quite right for it, although you are indeed brave.**

_Okay. So what am I?_

**Well, let's see… I don't think you belong in Slytherin. You aren't quite right for it, either.**

_I guess I won't be involved in any major conflicts._

**Not between houses, but believe me, there will be some events in which even the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs must choose sides. Be aware.**

_Hmm… well, I'll just take the good side…_

**A wise choice, however, not something a Ravenclaw would say.**

_Wait, before you shout Hufflepuff, let me ask you something!_

**What is it?**

_What would a Ravenclaw say?_

**Something along the lines of 'I'll choose whichever side has the most logical reasons for their actions.'**

_Alright. By the way, I like Hufflepuff, so thanks._

**You are welcome.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: Yay, I updated! And I think this is my best chapter yet in this story! :D Maybe I should write after my bedtime every time I update… in my defense, though, I did the first A/N and the first line before my bedtime. :P**


	29. Frank Longbottom

**A/N: Now that I can log in, I HAVE to update! : )**

* * *

"Longbottom, Frank!"

_What house am I in?_

**Whichever house accepts rushers… I'd say Slytherin.**

_NO!_

**I was kidding…**

_Phew…_

**You could… no, you most certainly are not a Slytherin.**

_Yes!_

**Let me guess, you'd like to be in Gryffindor.**

_Yeah, of course!_

**Who doesn't…**

_Malfoys?_

**Besides the obvious.**

_Well… I don't know. Evil people?_

**Evil people… psh… not all Slytherins are evil.**

_Then how come every Slytherin I know is evil?_

**Well, because you have bad luck in which Slytherins you meet, I suppose.**

_Oh… well, I'm sure that 99.999999999999999-_

**Oh, Merlin, I get it!**

_Sorry…_

**Sigh…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I thought this one was kinda funny… : )**


	30. Fred Weasley

**A/N: Sorry, I was transported into medieval times, so I couldn't update. Alright, fine… I was just playing the Sims Medieval. Same concept though. Either way, I wasn't in a writing mood… I'm still not really, but I can't go too long without updating. And you know what? The sortee for this chapter is one of my favorite characters! (Fred.)**

**Oh yeah, in case you're confused, I changed my username. :S Agapplesauce just doesn't fit. So now I'm Luna [Lovegood] Angel [Ride] [Zoe] Nightshade. Characters from HP, Maximum Ride, and Percy Jackson. :)**

* * *

"Weasley, Fred!"

**Wait… Weasley? The fourth one? Weasleys are only supposed to have three kids!**

_Well, mate, I'm the fifth._

**Fifth? Can you not count?**

_My twin came before me. Oh yeah, there's sixteen more after that, mate._

**WHAT?**

_I'm just joshing you, mate. There's two of the little buggers._

**Phew… and what's with the accent?**

_What accent, mate?_

**The accent! It's some horrible mix of Australian, British, American, and German!**

_Right on 3 accounts, mate._

**I am not your mate!**

_Yes, you are, mate._

**Don't…blow…up…**

_Boom, mate!_

_**"GRYFFINDOR!"**_

**Now I can blow up in peace- oh no, he has a twin… crap…**

_I heard that, mate!_

**These kids... they kill me.**

* * *

Fred and the Hat would have continued their quarrel, but Minnie interrupted them. She knew how the older students felt when Sortings took too long.

* * *

**A/N: I think I did a good job with Fred… ah, haven't written him in human form since I was a budding writer! (Believe me, that story is not very good. It was my first one.) I have only written him as a person in George's dreams… I really should write the sequel to that story. If any of you have read the series, I will do it in the summer. I will make myself. :P**

**Now, this isn't the place to talk about other stories! Let's have a party for the 30th chapter! We have… dun dun dun dun… CLOWNS!**

**And the star clown is my engineering teacher! (We had a brief discussion in class where he agreed to be a clown for $50 an hour for 30 minutes.)**

**To escape my madness (evoked by one Reese's mini thing and just my normal self!) just review. :P**


	31. George Weasley

A/N: Now, for the first fictional character I was ever truly obsessed with… well, the first HP one, but Scooby Doo characters hardly count. :P

* * *

"Weasley, George!"

**Oh, please be nothing like your brother.**

_Oh, you mean Percy? Don't worry, I'm not._

**I meant Fred.**

_Oh, well, I am exactly like him!_

**Well… at least you didn't get the same bright idea as him…**

_What are you talking about, mate?_

**Where did that come from!**

_Fred and I planned this out, you see. Like most things we do, mate._

**Oh, you Weasleys… tell me the rest aren't like this.**

_Nah, Ron's a Percy, and Ginny's… I don't know, mate._

**What do you have against Percy?**

_Everything, mate._

**You are quite rude.**

_You are even more rude, mate._

**Well, at least you didn't use a Jamaican accent…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Thanks, mate-mon!_

* * *

**A/N: Sorry, I'm obsessed with Jamaican accents… mon. : ) I must go call my mom a mate-mon… bye! Review!**


	32. Gilderoy Lockhart

**A/N: Erm… I am now back in school (well, I was, but now it's the weekend…) so once again, the time disappeared. I mean, I don't have that much after-school time, but it still goes faster than vacation somehow. :P Interesting fact about Lockhart: he was the only HP character based on someone real (not counting Crookshanks)… I wouldn't want to be that person. **

**Okay, holy crap: Thought I posted this... sorry! I didn't realize how long it had been! I thought it was only a few days, and I went to update... urg...**

**Well, I have a lot on my mind... I find out I might be moving, I find out someone I thought I knew since 3rd grade is more Draco-Fanfiction-Malfoy than i ever thought... (just read Draco stories that aren't romance, and take a hint, because I don't feel like explaining at the moment... It would be longer than my longest story.)**

**But i really wrote a one-shot for one of the things on my mind... Not posting it, unless I edit it. Either way, it would go under Fictionpress, unless I changed the character to Draco. But it wouldn't have the same effect.**

**i'll just shut up now... :)**

* * *

"Lockhart, Gilderoy!"

_This hat is ugly… ruining my appearance…_

**I take offence to that.**

_Ah! You talk!_

**Did you not pay attention to my song? Or the sortings before yours?**

_…Not really._

**Too busy complaining about your hair, I would imagine…**

_Well, that rain is awful!_

**I see… not.**

_Oh, just sort me! And not Slytherin, my dad's a muggle-born!_

**Ah… no, you do not fit in Slytherin. You aren't as brave as a caterpillar…**

_Hey!_

**It's true. You are also not as smart as one…**

_You stop it!_

**Caterpillars are rather smart.**

_I don't care!_

**Well… you don't fit in Hufflepuff either… but I guess it would work… better than the other houses anyway... Helga did say she'd take the non-brave, unintelligent, and non-cunning ones...**

_**"HUFFLEPUFF!"**_

_Caterpillars are stupid!_

**Just sit at your table already!**

* * *

**A/N: I have no idea if caterpillars really are smart… let's just pretend they are. :P**

**Ah, uploading the document, i named it 'tsha chap 32'. That reminded me of Tisha, a 5 or so year old who died in the book I just read... makes me sad. She was way too young to die, not even JKR is that cruel with character death!  
**


	33. Ginevra Weasley

**A/N: I know it's short and kinda late, but I had end-of-grade tests this week (I passed, unsurprisingly) and this one just fits. Er, it fits with Ginny's Fred/George side, that is... but that's the one I prefer. :)**

* * *

"Weasley, Ginevra!"

**Aren't you the… seventh Weasley?**

_Yeah._

_**Are you the last?**_

_Yeah._

**Are you the only girl in a while?**

_Yeah._

**Thought so.**

_Yeah._

**…Yeah?**

_Yeah._

**Alright…**

_Yeah._

**Got anything to say?**

_Yeah._

**What?**

_Yeah._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Yeah. :P**_**  
**_


	34. Gregory Goyle

**A/N: 88 reviews…. That's really amazing. Now, my challenge is to get to 100 by my birthday- which, by the way, is June 1st. I think, with the 50 people on Story Alert, you should be able to do it. It's only 12 reviews in 8 days. : )**

* * *

"Goyle, Gregory!"

_Uh… can I be in Slytherin?_

**Hm… maybe. You sure aren't a Ravenclaw.**

_Uh… they're the brave ones, right?_

**No. But you aren't a Gryffindor either.**

_Oh… so I'm not brave or smart._

**Er… right… well, do you consider yourself to be more of a Hufflepuff or a Slytherin? I value your opinion.**

_A Hufflepuff's evil, and Slytherins are loyal… uh… Hufflepuff!_

**I honestly don't agree.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Is Goyle stupid enough? :P**


	35. Hannah Abbott

**A/N: Well, I think we'll get past 100 reviews by June 1st. : ) Thanks for all the reviews! The minute I see we reach 100, I'll update once a day until June 1st, and maybe once a day after June 9th, when I get out of school. : ) Probably once or twice a day from June 29 to July 3, when I have nothing to do. :/ Anyway, we're getting way ahead here… here's the chapter.**

* * *

"Abbott, Hannah!"

_Why do I have to be first…? Why?_

**What's wrong with being first?**

_I- you're in my head!_

**Well, I am just talking quietly, so only you can hear me.**

_Oh… okay… well, what house am I in?_

**You're here so we can find out.**

_Well, I know that!_

**Good.**

_So, am I in Slytherin?_

**Do you _want_ to be in Slytherin?**

_No!_

**That's good, because you are not right for Slytherin. Not very cunning or sly, though you have some ambition in there.**

_Well… that's a relief. What about Ravenclaw? I don't think I'm smart enough._

**You aren't 'dumb', so to speak, but you are correct; you are not Ravenclaw-smart.**

_Okay. Am I a Gryffindor or a Hufflepuff?_

**Well, that's often a tough choice with those houses being so similar… only bravery really sets them apart, sometimes.**

_Well then, am I brave or not? I once killed a big snake, is that brave?_

**I believe it was brave, considering you may have saved your sister's life. However, I am not so sure Gryffindor is quite right for you.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: Hm, I think I made a good one… : ) Just 2 more reviews, I don't even have to ask, really. So, Hermione is tomorrow, just so you know… I have them all planned out… although I will take requests. However, no next generation yet. I will do them eventually, but I'm finishing all the already-sorted-by-1997 ones first.**


	36. Hermione Granger

**A/N: Thanks for the 104 reviews! Sorry I didn't update yesterday, but I'll update twice today. I was busy last night (the Bruins are going to the Stanley Cup! :D ), and in the evening my computer wasn't working, but it's fine now.**

* * *

"Granger, Hermione!"

_Just go ahead and say Ravenclaw!_

**Why?**

_Because that's my house, of course, and I don't want to be with that Ron Weasley, and he isn't smart enough, and-_

**Okay, okay. Breath. And accept that you're in love with this Ron Weasley.**

_What? I am not!_

**You are, and you'll realize it some day… I hope. I'll have to ask your children if that happens.**

_I am not in love with that Weasley!_

**You are…**

_I am not!_

**Am not what? A Ravenclaw?**

_In love with Ron Weasley! What do you think?_

**Oh, you _are_ in love with Ron Weasley?**

_Can we stop discussing my non-love life?_

**All you had to do was ask! Which house do you want to be in?**

_Ravenclaw is where I belong, although Gryffindor sounds better._

**Well, I know which one you really belong in-**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**But Ravenclaw is your second house, for sure. Say hi to the Weasleys for me! Including Ron!**

* * *

A/N: Yeah, I always wondered how she got into Gryffindor… I think it has something to do with the hat playing matchmaker. :P And I know Ron was sorted after Hermione, but the Hat just knows he'll be in Gryffindor...


	37. James Potter I

**A/N: Just so you know, this is James as in Harry's father, not his son. James II is for later on when I do NextGen.**

* * *

"Potter, James!"

**Another Potter, I may as well say Gryffindor already. But with Black earlier, that isn't safe.**

_Sirius is different from the other Blacks._

**In major ways, but they still have some similarities, such as the temper.**

_Well… I guess. But what house am _I_ in?_

**Well, not Slytherin or Ravenclaw, but the others fit.**

_Can I be in Gryffindor?_

**Well… since it works… and the others don't work any better…**

_Is that a yes?_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I think James would fit in any house except Slytherin; although he is smart enough, he isn't bookish enough for Ravenclaw. But Hufflepuff and Gryffindor are quite similar.**


	38. Justin FinchFletchley

**A/N: Sheesh, I have not kept my promise at all, have I? I just can't write when I have a friend over, you know… but I'll make up for it now. Sorry about that!**

* * *

"Finch-Fletchley, Justin!"

**Finch-Fletchley… I'm sure I'd have heard of that name, or at least the two names in it. Muggle-born?**

_Yes. Why is that such a bad thing?_

**It's not, why do you think that?**

_Well, this blonde kid came up to me on the train and called me a mudblood, and my new friend Ernie figured out what it meant!_

**Blonde kid… oh, I do see a Malfoy in the crowd…**

_Malfoy… isn't that some evil family?_

**Well, they aren't all evil… there was one 300 years ago who was good… sort of…**

_Okay, so they're evil._

**You may think that.**

_So, what house am in? Is it Malfoy's house?_

**Malfoy doesn't yet have a house, but you won't be a Slytherin, I can assure you.**

_Good… I heard that's the evil house._

**No, it's the cunning, sly, and ambitious house. But a lot of them turn out evil, yes.**

_Oh. Whatever. Am I in the good one? Gryffindor?_

**…Good one? They are all good!**

_No, only Gryffindor is, I heard._

**Not everything you hear is correct!**

_I believe everything Ernie says because he's my best friend._

**…Didn't you just meet him, what, _today_?**

_Yes._

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_What? They're duffers!_

* * *

**A/N: Stereotyped, much? Well, I think there had to have been some reason why the hat was so quick with Malfoy, since he could've been a Ravenclaw, so this works.**


	39. Katie Bell

**A/N: I'm back… five seconds later. :)**

* * *

"Bell, Katie!"

_Which house is for clumsy people?_

**There isn't one specifically for clumsy people, though they often end up in Hufflepuff.**

_That's my house then. I'm clumsier than clumsy._

**You are not.**

_You don't know me!_

**Well, I can see into your head…**

_Oh… well… um…_

**You are still clumsy, but it's often just bad luck causing you to have accidents.**

_Well… that is clumsiness!_

**It is not.**

_Is too!_

**I'm not going to continue this entirely pointless argument.**

_Fine!_

_**…**_

**I've been looking in your head all this time, and I've decided you are a**

**_GRYFFINDOR!_**

_Yay!_

* * *

**A/N: Um… yeah. That's yesterday's chapter. :3**


	40. Kingsley Shacklebolt

**A/N: Now we are finally on today's chapter. Tomorrow is my favorite character: Luna! :D**

* * *

"Shacklebolt, Kingsley!"

**I already know which house I'm in.**

_Which one?_

**Gryffindor.**

_Ah… you think?_

**No, I know. I already said so.**

**Hm… well… you are not a Ravenclaw, but you'd do well in Hufflepuff…**

_What about Slytherin?_

**I thought you were so sure you'd be in Gryffindor?**

_I am, I just wanted to hear your opinion on Slytherin. It could be my second house, after all._

**…Second house?**

_You know, like a smart Gryffindor's would be-_

**I know. I just didn't know you students actually kept track of those…**

_Well, duh!_

**They didn't a hundred years ago.**

_Huh… those oldies sure weren't well-rounded, then._

**Oldies? At the time, they were 11!**

_Some were 18._

**They started at 11.**

_Can we get on with this?_

**Eager to change the subject… not a Hufflepuff…**

_What does that have to do with Hufflepuff?_

**…Nothing. Just commenting.**

_…Okay…so, _am_ I a Gryffindor?_

**…Hm…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_I'll take that as a yes._

* * *

**A/N: So, that's all for today. I honestly have no idea where I went with this one, but it's all good. At least one chapter tomorrow! : ) And I will make Luna's… interesting. : )**


	41. Luna Lovegood

A/N: I thought I'd get out multiple chapters on my b-day. Haha. Good thing I didn't promise that. O.o I just found out my grandma read Maximum Ride and watched Harry Potter… and I thought she only read adult romance. Oh yeah, just so you know, rewriting Cinderella is not the best homework: it takes forever.

Okay, I know I didn't post it yesterday: I tried. My computer didn't work, but... I tried... well, here it is, nice and early-ish too!

* * *

"Lovegood, Luna!"

**Lovegood- are you anything like your father?**

_Hello, I suppose I am, though people say I'm just like my mum._

**Ah… oh boy, you are. Sylvia Erwin... strange one, she was...**

_Strange is a good thing. Also, you seem agitated, do you have some Sasodefe Dkaosqouks in your head? They make you annoyed because of their loud buzzing sound._

**I don't hear a loud buzzing sound. Not to mention I don't have a head…**

_Oh, you don't _hear_ the buzzing sound. Not to the naked ear. And they like hats, 'in your head' is just an expression._

**Erm… yes…**

_Well, just curious-_

**Which house are you in?**

_Well, Ravenclaw, of course. But I was going to ask if you've ever seen a Crumple-Horned Snorkack._

**Eh… no. And I'm glad you did all the work for me… well, Ravenclaw does seem… right…**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

**Phew, she's gone- wait, you did not just hear that, it was the, uh, Sasodefeey Dkaosqjlokouks. Yeah. Those. Bye!**

* * *

**A/N: Phew, Luna's creatures- the names. Lol. O.o I think the Hat would've gotten tired of her quickly… same with me. You do not want to be in my head- I have too much for myself sometimes. Yes, I once dreamed up a scenario so realistic, I completely forgot that it wasn't real… okay, more than once. :3**

**Since my grandma is here until June 29, I might not update every day. I'll try to at least do a good one every other day though. K?**


	42. Lee Jordan

**A/N: I just solved a mystery! …Well, not really on topic, but I did… okay, anyway. For a whole year almost, I'd wondered who this guy in my neighborhood was, now I found him in a yearbook, and he turns out to be that weird kid I don't even know. o.O **

**Sorry I haven't updated in so long! The last week of school is busier than you'd think! Tomorrow is my last day! Woohoo! I actually like school though. I just hate waking up early… Also, Walmart has a good selection of books… I got Harry Potter 6 & 7, some Mortal Instruements books, some Percy Jackson, ANGEL, Witch and Wizard, The Caster Chronicles, Shimmer… I think that's it. But they had even more… and this isn't even a big-city Walmart. Also, it's cheaper than Barnes & Noble- just so you know. ;)**

* * *

"Jordan, Lee!"

_I bet I know which house I'm in!_

**Which one?**

_Gryffindor! That's where all the pranksters go!_

**…Pranksters, you say?**

_Natuurlik, ek is lief om prank._

**…What? I'm afraid I don't speak Afrikaans, and you don't have anything in your mind to help me…**

_Wag, jy lees gedagtes? Bloody hel! Kry uit my gedagtes!_

**Speak English!**

_Engels? Hoe durf jy praat so sweer in my jong gees!_

**I'll just have to go by what I see…**

_Laat my gedagtes, jy dom hoed!_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**That was risky…**

_Ek haat jou! Ten minste het jy het my in die regte huis... nog steeds ... grr ..._

**A/N: Here's a translation for Lee's Afrikaans, not sure how accurate it is.**

_**Natuurlik, ek is lief om prank- Of course, I love to prank.**_

_**Wag, jy lees gedagtes? Bloody hel! Kry uit my gedagtes!- Wait, you read minds? Bloody hell! Get out of my mind!**_

_**Engels? Hoe durf jy praat so sweer in my jong gees!- English? How dare you put such swears in my young mind!**_

_**Laat my gedagtes, jy dom hoed!- Leave my mind, you stupid hat!**_

_**Ek haat jou! Ten minste het jy het my in die regte huis... nog steeds ... grr …-I hate you! At least you put me in the right house... still... grr...**_

**Okay, I hope it was worth the wait. : )**


	43. Lily Evans

**A/N: I'm going long times without updating, aren't I? But I think, with school out, it will be a bit more frequent… maybe…**

**Oh yeah, and I got one step closer to one of my lifetime goals. (Convince all my family and friends to read Harry Potter.) My grandma has enjoyed it from SS chap 1. :) She was on 'The Midnight Duel' an hour ago.  
**

* * *

"Evans, Lily!"

**You seem… well… infuriated.**

_I am! That Potter was making fun of Sev! He is such a prat!_

**…Just wait; it's obvious you like Potter.**

_I do not! Anyway, am I in Slytherin? Or Gryffindor? Because Sev thinks I could be in either one, and he thinks he'll be in Slytherin! But I'm Muggle-born, so I couldn't be in Slytherin but I want to be with Sev, and he's my only friend-_

**Enough rambling! You're going to blow out my nonexistent eardrums!**

_…You make no sense._

**Well, I'll put it bluntly- your rambling annoys me, and it surely annoys your friends and family as well.**

_I can't help it, I'm nervous! Just put me in a house, please!_

**I was working on it.**

_Didn't seem like it, and still doesn't._

**If you gave me a chance to tell you what I was thinking, you would know the thoughts behind this action.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I think I'll write the next chapter and then post them both, since I haven't updated in a whole 5 days, which is the longest I, long ago, said I would go without updating anything. So, get ready for one of my most hated characters in HP- Lucius Malfoy. Grr to him.**


	44. Lucius Malfoy

**A/N: Grr, it's Malfoy Sr… Okay, I already expressed my hatred of him. (Although I do love my version of Draco who you will hopefully be able to read about before 2012.) Oh yeah, sorry it's kind of short, but he's so Slytherin-y, the Hat couldn't have taken much longer than Draco, probably shorter, but I felt like writing some more.**

* * *

"Malfoy, Lucius!"

_I know I'm in Slytherin, and this stupid piece of cloth is ruining my hair. Just hurry up and shout the name already. Slytherin, Slytherin._

**Hufflepuff!**

_WHAT?_

**You know, only you heard that. I'd love to put you there, just to spite you for insulting the hat of Godric Gryffindor. Unfortunately, I have to put you where you belong.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Well, review please! It would be funny if the hat could put people where they didn't belong… only in a parody fic, or a troll fic, I guess.**


	45. Lavender Brown

**A/N: I have a new fic, also a game show! I need lots of people to review and vote for this to work, so please check out 'Who Would Win in a Duel?'! It's on my profile.**

**I just read the weirdest crossover ever- Percy Jackson and Justin Bieber! http :/ www . fanfiction . net /s/ 5983234 /1/ Demigod _ Percy _ J _ Justin _ Bieber_ xover**

**Even if you don't like JB (I don't) it's a great story.**

**And WOOHOO, THE BRUINS WON THE STANLEY CUP! :D**

**Oh, and sorry for the lack of update- I've been busy, uh… reading. Yeah. Reading. *Cough***

**Now, I have slight writer's block for this chapter (I mean, Lavender!) but I will force myself to write now.**

* * *

"Brown, Lavender!"

_Does this hat, like, read my mind or something? I mean, it, like, sung earlier, and shouted out the other people's houses…_

**I do 'read your mind', as Muggles would call it, and I can assure you that you won't be placed in Ravenclaw.**

_It talked!_

**'It'?**

_Yes, it!_

**Well, I like to think of myself as 'male'.**

_Um… I wish this thing would just sort me…_

**You are starting to annoy me, I hate when people can't accept my powers, so I'll just kindly 'read your mind' and sort you.**

_Bloody hat, get out of my mind!_

**You _do_ realize that you are thinking and I am responding, right? So, you are inviting me to invade your mind… how contradictory.**

_JUST SORT ME ALREADY!_

**I decided a whole minute ago… but, I'll wait until you are polite, I believe.**

_Please sort me._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Bloody hell… about time…_

* * *

**A/N: Well, I guess it's good enough… I just dislike Lavender… so, I'm not sure why I wrote her anyway… then again, I did write a chapter for Lucius Malfoy… Well, review please! :)**


	46. Ludo Bagman

**A/N: The background of my computer is now a picture of Lucius Malfoy, even though I hate him! Does that make sense…? Well, it's funny though. If you type 'Lucius Malfoy peacocks' into Google Images, it's the first one that comes up.**

* * *

"Bagman, Ludo!"

**I've already been having a bad day, so let's just get this over with.**

_…alright?_

**Which house do you want to be in?**

_Um…_

**There is not a house called 'um'! Make up your mind!**

_Um, Gryffindor? I don't even know all the houses!_

**…How can you not even know all the houses?**

_…Well, I'm, er, Muggle-born, and I, well, didn't pay full attention when McGonagall came to my house and explained everything._

**So, you weren't excited by the magic.**

_Of course I was!_

**Oh, look-we've reached the thirty second time limit I've set for today.**

_What?_

**Better be… ah, this isn't too hard of a choice…**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: The Sorting Hat is in a bad mood! Yeah, I sometimes get writer's block with this. Only with some characters, though. Like, Hermione is easy- just talk about Ravenclaw, Ron, all that stuff. And Lavender and Ludo are kind of… hard.**

**Well, anyway. Review please! : ) Also, check out my two new fics- Who Would Win in a Duel? and Snape or Snake.**


	47. Minerva McGonagall

**A/N: I now have a great idea of what to write! …I love Minnie. Not romantically. Oh, and her (current?) last name is there because I don't think she is married… if she is in canon, let me know, and I'll fix it.**

* * *

"McGonagall, Minerva!"

**Ah, you have great potential in any of the four houses. Which one would you prefer?**

_I'm… not quite sure. Maybe… Gryffindor? I hear it's the best._

**Gryffindor… hm, you are quite brave. You would do anything to protect those you love, and those who are your responsibility.**

_Even die?_

**That's something you'll need to decide yourself.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Yeah… it's short. Shorter even then my other fic's update for today. I think. Well, Minnie (Yes, I love calling her that!) is definitely a Gryffindor. Also, just a question of interest (and to make up for the short chapter, I guess), which house would you be in/is your favorite? Mine is Ravenclaw.**


	48. Molly Weasley nee Prewett

**A/N: It's only been 3 days! Lol. But for the next few days, I might update every day because I won't have much to do.**

* * *

"Prewett, Molly!"

**Hm… you are a bit trickier than most, that's for sure.**

_I want to be in Gryffindor! Or maybe Hufflepuff wouldn't be too bad… but I prefer Gryffindor._

**Okay, well, it's either Gryffindor or Slytherin for you.**

_Gryffindor!_

**I have to decide which one fits better…**

_Just. Say. Gryffindor._

**Gryffindor.**

_I don't think you said it loud enough._

**Oh, you want the whole school to hear it? You should have said so… tsk tsk.**

_Yes, sort me into Gryffindor! For Merlin's sake, it's not that hard!_

**Oh, you wish to be sorted. I'll sort you then.**

_Finally!_

**Hm… ah… yes…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I was going to end it after the fourth line… glad I managed to make it longer…**


	49. Sylvia Lovegood nee Erwin

**A/N: Ack! It's been days! Again! Well, uh, my grandma is here! So that's an excuse! …anyway. For those of you who have read 'George Weasley and the Death Eater', 'Holed Away', and/or 'The Cloaked Woman', I am working on the fourth installment! :D It's called 'Finding Fred'. Unless I come up with a better title. And it's not just about George! It has more Fred in it besides Dream-Fred and Evil-Fred! But it'll be a while before I post it… hopefully before September.**

**Also- this is Luna's mum. It's kind of a bonus chapter. And her name is Sylvia because that's what I think it is… it was never specified.**

* * *

"Erwin, Sylvia!"

_Hi, do you talk?_

**Erm, hello, yes, I do.**

_Same here! I think you can talk because of the Alaosn Sqopwas! They make inanimate objects speak German, and you could have learned English from there! Or we could be speaking in German and not even know it!_

**…I'm afraid you are incorrect. I speak because Godric Gryffindor put a spell on me to make me have a mind of my own. Now, which house would you like to be in?**

_Ooh, all of them sound amazing! Even Slytherin!_

**Alright… which house do you think you belong in?**

_Hm… either Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff. I'm smart, I think, and I think I'm nice and loyal, caring, all that. Plus I can be witty._

**Ah… how very true. You could easily go for either house. Do you have a preference?**

_No._

**Very well.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Probably my most serious chapter in a while… :P Oh, and happy 4th to my fellow Americans! :D I hate this stupid drought, because I'm not sure I'll be able to shoot off fireworks because of it! Grr!**


	50. Michael Corner

**A/N: I always come up with my good story ideas in the master bathroom. Any idea why? But I came up with this chapter in the bathroom, along with a story I'm writing but not posting yet, and a story that I think I'll write a book out of some day. :P**

**Oh, and they really do say loo in the UK, right? I'm an American who's never left the side of the country I'm on, so I have no clue.**

* * *

"Corner, Michael!"

_Can we get this over with?_

**Why?**

_I have to pee!_

**…Well, then ask Professor McGonagall if you can be excused to go.**

_But I'm a first year, I don't know where it is!_

**Ask her to show you.**

_…okay! But can you please sort me first?_

**Sure.**

_I want to be in any house but Gryffindor or Slytherin._

**Why not either of those?**

_Too much rivalry. I want to be in Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw. Preferably Ravenclaw, because they have the least conflict of all. Do I have what it takes to be in Rowena's house?_

**Hm… I believe you might. However, you would also fit in Slytherin just as well. So, it is your choice.**

_Ravenclaw, and I _really_ have to go!_

**I'll hurry it up then-**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

"Erm… Professor?"

"Yes, Mr. Corner?"

"I… I have to use the loo, but I don't know where it is."

"Ah, go ask your new head of house, Professor Flitwick. He's the short one, 3rd seat to the left."

"Okay, thank you."

"No problem."

* * *

**A/N: Haha. I like this one. : ) You have to admit it's strange- there's no bathroom on the Hogwarts Express, and no one ever has to go. Then again, no one every uses the bathroom in pretty much everything I read! And Happy 50th chapter! :D**


	51. Parvati Patil

**A/N: Hey, I'm alive! Sorry it took so long, I was grounded, but now I'm allowed on fanfiction. No other website… and I got the one that I really care about. :P Not complaining though! Anyway, I was still allowed to go to the midnight release of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2! :D It was so awesome! I dressed as Hermione with bushy hair and a purple bathrobe. :P I'm going to ramble about the movie now.**

**Warning: HPDHP2 spoilers.**

**Okay, people in my theater screamed when Bellatrix was killed and when Nagini was killed. But no noise when Voldemort was killed. O.o**

**I hated that white light before the limbo! Luckily, I'm still not blind.**

**Remus and Tonks got justice at last! I mean, a whole 5 seconds devoted to their death! In exchange for Colin, I suppose. And I just realized they never showed Wormtail's death in the movie. Oh, and what ever happened to Teddy?**

**I was thinking I might cry when Fred died. BUT THEY GAVE HIM NO DEATH SCENE! AND GEORGE SEEMED OKAY WITH FRED'S DEATH! I suppose Oliver Phelps is to blame for the latter, but David Yates could have included an epic death scene!**

**The Gringotts break-in rocked. :D**

**Voldemort **_hugged_** Draco. That seriously creeped me out. I was like, are there now 2 gay guys in HP? Ah, yes, Dumbledore and Voldemort… such a wonderful couple. :P Lol. Can you imagine how Draco would've felt? Or how Tom Felton actually felt? Oh, and Tom Felton has a youtube account where he has music. I was listening to one song, and it was like Draco Malfoy was singing 'in Hawaii' or whatever… it was very strange. **

**My brother's sort-of girlfriend (who was with us) cried at Snape's memories. I wanted to, but I don't cry easily. I think they did a great job on that part though. :')**

**Anyway, I really love Snape now too. So, now I have- Fred, George, Sirius, Remus, James, Draco, Cedric, and Snape! Haha, wish me luck finding a real boyfriend someday! **

**Ah, and I loved the scene when Neville killed Nagini. He had just sliced off her head with the sword of Gryffindor and his face was like 'Carry on then, nothing unusual.' Lol.**

**And the epilogue was good, but I feel it should've been more lengthy. **

**One more thing- I loved how Harry broke the Elder Wand and all, but he seriously should've fixed his Phoenix Feather wand first. **

**Oh, and I copied and pasted this A/N from Who Would Win In A Duel?- my other ongoing fic, just thought you should know in case you're experiencing déjà vu.**

* * *

"Patil, Parvati!"

_I don't know which house I want to be in, Gryffindor or Ravenclaw! Padma is in Ravenclaw, and I want to be with her, but I want to be in Gryffindor as well!_

**Whoa, slow down there! I think you would do fine in Gryffindor, though perhaps Ravenclaw is not quite right for you.**

_But Padma and I are twins, we have to be in the same house!_

**No, you don't have to be.**

_Well, we should be! The point is, she should have been in Gryffindor!_

**Too late, I already sorted her, and she was not right for Gryffindor, just as you aren't right for Ravenclaw.**

_But-_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Ah, yet another of my ideas from the bathroom… :P**


	52. Padma Patil

**A/N: Yeesh! It's been forever, hasn't it? (No.) It feels like it… but I just had to update this fic! Even though I still kinda have writer's block… I'll try! And I'll also try to update once every 3 days, at the least.**

**The only reason it took so long is because I needed a break from writing to really think, and watch Youtube videos. (Hey, you'd be surprised- just look up 'Malfoy's Peacocks' and get started! Yes, they have videos using Katy Perry's 'Peacock' with Lucius Malfoy…)**

* * *

"Patil, Padma!"

_I don't care which house I am in, just let Parvati be in the same one._

**Ah, a strong bond with your sister, eh?**

_Yes, do you have a problem with that?_

**No, no. But as close as the two of you are, I'm not so sure you really belong in the same house.**

_No! We have to be together!_

**Believe me, I know which house is right for you. It is not Hufflepuff, loyal as you are to your sister, or Gryffindor, not that you aren't brave.**

_I want to be in the same house as Parvati, even if that means Slytherin!_

**You are clearly very loyal to your sister, to not care about going into Slytherin even being a half-blood. However, I know which house is right for you, and I will soon know which is right for your sister.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Well… for a chapter in which I had no idea what I was doing, I suppose it came out good enough… I'm just glad to have something!**


	53. Millicent Bulstrode

**A/N: Hello! I'm updating on time for once! Haha…**

* * *

"Bulstrode, Millicent!"

_Not Gryffindor…_

**Why not?**

_Gryffindor is where all the mudbloods and mudblood lovers go._

**Do not say that word, and not all Muggle-borns and 'blood-traitors' are in Gryffindor.**

_Whatever._

**Which house do you wish to be in?**

_Slytherin, of course._

**Alright… you most certainly do not belong in Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff… now, Gryffindor…**

_No!_

**Are you so sure?**

_Yes, Slytherin is where I will be!_

**Sir, yes, sir!**

_I'm female!_

**…sorry.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_Thank Merlin._

* * *

**A/N: Hm… I still keep on getting writer's block on this.**

**I've decided on when to end this fic. I'm just going to finish my list, then I'll be done. I'll eventually write a fic, not really a sequel, about sorting the next generation, when I feel up to it- I do believe that'll be more fun, because we only know for sure that James 2 is in Gryffindor, I believe, and I'm not even sure if that is a fact!**

**But… yeah. Review please!**


	54. Moaning Myrtle Henderson

**A/N: I almost forgot to update this! Oh, and Myrtle's surname is that of the actress who plays her, because she never had a surname in canon, and I doubt her name was 'Moaning Myrtle'. :P**

* * *

"Henderson, Myrtle!"

_I don't even care which house I'm in, just don't let it be the same as that Olive Hornby!_

**Ah, I can see your reasoning for that. However, I will place both you and her in the houses in which you belong.**

_Well, I refuse to be in the same house as her!_

**I will place you both in the house which most suits you. Now, let's continue the sorting. Is there any house you prefer?**

_I hear Slytherins resent Muggle-borns, so I don't think I want to be there, I'll only be teased even more._

**Slytherin… not the best house for you, don't worry.**

_Good._

**You don't belong in Gryffindor either.**

_Alright._

**Hufflepuff… I'm not so sure loyalty is your specialty, you are a bit… temperamental, and this can affect your relationships. However, you have the potential to be very intelligent… yes…**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Hm, I think this is my most… ah… In-Character chapter. I don't know, I am suffering from Writer's Block, so who knows!**


	55. Olive Hornby

**A/N: I haven't gotten many requests in this fic, but I'm doing nearly everyone anyway. And I wasn't planning on doing this character, but she was requested, so here she is. : )**

* * *

"Hornby, Olive!"

_Not Ravenclaw, please!_

**Why not?**

_I can not be in the same house as that pathetic Moaning Myrtle._

**What if I told you Ravenclaw was perfect for you?**

_I would hex you once I learn a hex._

**Ah… a very… Slytherin… answer.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Short, I know… oh well.**


	56. Tom Marvolo Riddle aka Voldemort

**A/N: Ah! I almost forgot to update! And I've been looking forward to this chapter! Then again, it'll be hard to write, I think, because Tom just kinda needs to be kept serious, you know?**

* * *

"Riddle, Tom!"

_I believe Slytherin sounds like the best house._

**Yes, plenty of wizards believe that… but not so many half-bloods.**

_It's not my fault that I'm a half-blood._

**I know that, I am not a prejudiced pure-blood.**

_Well, which house do I belong in? I don't like to be kept waiting._

**You'd like to be in Slytherin, correct?**

_Yes, of course._

**Ah… Well, let's see. You would get nowhere in Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw, but you could have a chance in Gryffindor.**

_No way!_

**Let me continue. However, I feel that your best choice is most certainly…**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: I think I did a great job, considering that I listened to Cannibal (Ke$ha) while writing it… that makes me think of the Donner party, who went on the Oregon Trail in 18-something, rumor has it they had to resort to cannibalism to survive.**


	57. Nymphadora Tonks

**A/N: Oh my gosh, 100 alerts! I think, because of that, I'm going to start updating every other day, rather than every 3 days! I'll start tomorrow (later today...), though, because I don't want updates to always be the same as my other fic… oh, and I got a great idea for this last night, around 3 am. Surprising that I remember it!**

**Oh, and this may not relate to HP at all, but happy birthday (August 18) to Percy Jackson, son of Poseidon! :) Although at the moment, if he were real, he'd believe himself to be a son of Neptune...  
**

* * *

"Tonks, Nymphadora!"

_Picture yourself in a boat on a river…_

**Why…?**

_With tangerine trees and marmalade skies…_

**Why are you singing 'Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds' during your sorting?**

_Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly…_

**I guess I'll just look into your memories to sort you.**

_A girl with kaleidoscope eyes…_

**Hm… yes, yes…**

_Cellophane flowers of yellow and green…_

**Ah…**

_Towering over your head…_

**Of course, of course.**

_Look for the girl with the sun in her eyes,_

**Very well…**

_And she's gone…_

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_Lucy in the sky, with diamonds..._

* * *

Tonks had wanted to talk to the Sorting Hat. It was a once in a lifetime experience. Unfortunately, her dad just had to get that song stuck in her head, and she couldn't think of anything else.

At least Hufflepuff looked inviting.

Maybe she would end up in Dumbledore's office later on, and try the hat on again.

Just for fun.

* * *

**A/N: Man, it's awesome to be able to include a song I love without it being totally unrealistic- The Beatles were already broken up by the 1980s, I'm pretty sure. Anyway, sorry I got it out kinda late, but I'm reading 3 legendary stories at once, so writing is kinda a burden… when I finish those fics, I'll be much more enthusiastic about it. : ) Oh, and all 3 of them are soon going into my community, so I advise you check them out. Two are HP, one is Percy Jackson.**

**Oh yeah- I do not own the Beatles, or the song Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. Nor do I own Harry Potter or anything associated with it, although I believe I already said that ages ago.**


	58. Xenophilius Lovegood

**A/N: I haven't even read the reviews and I'm updating… I'm late. I went shopping today, so I really didn't get on the computer much… I always have an excuse, huh? Oh well, I consider 1:32 am to basically still be the previous day, since I'm usually up then!**

* * *

"Lovegood, Xenophilius!"

_I wish not to be placed in Gryffindor or Slytherin._

**Why not?**

_They have a major rivalry, so there must be a lot of Nargles in their dormitories._

**…Right. Well, don't worry, neither of those houses are fit for you.**

_That's a relief._

**Yes… now, which house, ah, has less Nargles, Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff?**

_Oh, Ravenclaw, of course. Hufflepuff isn't too heavy with Nargles, but I believe the house is filled with Ranxes. Ravenclaw has lots of Allorbians._

**Of course, of course… You could be in Ravenclaw, but your knowledge isn't quite… fact. You are very loyal to those you love, so Hufflepuff is quite a possibility.**

_I'd like Ravenclaw._

**Are you sure?**

_Yes._

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Allorbians make you a faster learner when they're nearby, and Ranxes… I don't know what they do, just make something up. :)**


	59. Marcus Flint

**A/N: Hey, is anyone having trouble uploading chapters? Because none of my alerts have been updated since the 19th- and I have over 3 or 4 hundred alerts. Anyway, sorry about the missed update, I just didn't have the time. Anyway, I'm probably getting a major hurricane- possibly a direct hit- this weekend, so I'll probably be able to write, but if the power goes out, that means no internet, so I won't be posting. Oh, and I felt an earthquake for the first time in my life today! Luckily it was a long ways away, so there was no damage in my area- not even a tree branch fell down. Anyway, obsessed as I am with the weather, I'll stop rambling.**

* * *

"Flint, Marcus!"

_Slytherin, Slytherin, Slytherin…_

**Do you wish to be in Gryffindor?**

_No way! And how are you talking to me?_

**I'm a talking hat, yes- it's called magic. Now, why do you not want to be in Gryffindor?**

_Gryffindor is for mudbloods-_

**Do not use that word.**

_-and blood traitors! I need to be in Slytherin!_

**I see… yes, you could be in Gryffindor… ah, no. No, not Slytherin, I'm afraid.**

_I HAVE TO BE IN SLYTHERIN!_

**…You sound like a troll.**

_I'm part troll, so what?_

**I have nothing wrong with it, I just hate to think of how a troll and a human can possibly… have children.**

_Oh, gross! I'm only one sixteenth troll anyway, now just shout Slytherin already!_

**Hm… you most certainly could not be a Ravenclaw. No way. Hufflepuff just wouldn't cut it either… I have to say…**

_Slytherin!_

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Oh my goodness, for once I'm going to post a chapter before midnight! That's a major change!**


	60. Narcissa Malfoy nee Black

**A/N: Lol, I just started school today and now there's no school tomorrow. That is just too funny… guess I owe Irene one! So, I'll try to update on time still, but no guarantees.**

**Ah, one of my favorite female characters for this chapter! : )**

* * *

"Black, Narcissa!"

**Let me guess, you'd like to be in Slytherin?**

_I have to be in Slytherin. I'm a Black. Plus, Mum would kill me if I wasn't in Slytherin._

**Ah… I see. However, I am not entirely sure Slytherin is right for you…**

_No, it has to be!_

**I know Hufflepuff is not where you belong, but you'd do well in Ravenclaw or Slytherin. Perhaps Gryffindor, if you ask, could work.**

_I have to be in Slytherin, I already told you!_

**Yes, I'm aware that you believe you have to be in Slytherin; however, I, as the Hogwarts Sorting Hat, have the right to place you in whichever house you truly belong, Slytherin, Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, or Hufflepuff.**

_Alright, I get it… but I really, really, want to be in Slytherin!_

**Do you now?**

_Yes!_

**Very convincing… I, myself, am not quite sure as to whether or not you are lying, so I'll just have to take it from here.**

_Fine with me as long as I'm in Slytherin._

**You know, I don't think I've had a Slytherin who hasn't begged for that house since Cassiopeia Black…**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Oh wow, the 60th chapter! We've gotten so far! Well, happy 60th! (I feel like I'm talking to someone who's turning 60...) In celebration for the 75th chapter, I think I'll be doing something special. And I've decided to do NextGen as well, which means this will be over 100 chapters- wow!**

**Hm, I'm bored and I had a ton of fun- more than usual!- writing this... I'll write more than just one chapter today! :D  
**


	61. Neville Longbottom

**A/N: Haha, I know I said I'd post another chapter(s) at the end of the last chapter, but I was talking to my grandma, so that's the half-hour at most delay. :P**

* * *

"Longbottom, Neville!"

_Please shout out a house, please shout out a house…_

**I always shout out a house.**

_B-but I don't have much magic…_

**You really do, you're only eleven, too young to fully understand yourself…**

_Well, I guess I'm in Hufflepuff…_

**Nothing wrong with Hufflepuff! Though, really, I'm thinking you'd do well in a different house…**

_I'm not smart, brave, or cunning… I'm not even sure if I'm loyal!_

**Oh, you are. I feel as though you belong in…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Yes! Yes! Yes! How on Earth did that happen?_

**Return me to McGonagall!**

_Oh, right! Oh no…_

* * *

**A/N: In case you forgot, Neville ran off with the hat by accident… Okay, I know it's no longer only a half hour later than I thought, but… oh well. I wrote it when I didn't have to, so… be happy! : )**

**Also, I am getting a major hurricane soon. So, I doubt I'll update Saturday. And if I don't update by… Thursday, I either have no computer/internet or I'm dead. But please, don't assume I'm dead unless it becomes January 2012 and I haven't updated, alright? I'm actually excited for this hurricane, to be honest :P Now, weather ramblings belong on The Weather Channel's facebook page, so I'll just post the chapter now. : )**

**And if it does come to that- 'To the well-organized mind, death is but the next greatest adventure.' Anyone know who came up with that quote, without Google?  
**


	62. Pansy Parkinson

**A/N: Hello! Yeah, that hurricane was not a big deal… to my neighborhood, that is. A nearby town was underwater, I hear, but the worst damage in my yard was a few palm fronds that were blown away. :P So, I just got my internet back about 30 minutes ago, so after going on facebook and using the light (:D) I'm updating. I'll also post a one-shot tomorrow (well, later today) that I wrote while the power was out, but I still have to type it and possibly edit it… Yeah, I had a boring day… I almost never write something on paper.**

**Oh, and yes, Dumbledore said the quote in HP... but I was looking for JKR. I'm pretty sure one person said that. :)  
**

* * *

"Parkinson, Pansy!"

_Slytherin, Slytherin…_

**You wish to be in Hufflepuff?**

_No way, I have to be in Slytherin!_

**Why?**

_Otherwise I'll be surrounded by mudbloods!_

**Don't use that word.**

_Why not?_

**It's a bad word.**

_It's a bad word used to describe bad creatures._

**Muggle-borns are as human as you, possibly more, as they aren't slightly inbred.**

_I AM NOT INBRED, YOU-_

**So, your parents aren't 3rd cousins?**

_SO WHAT IF THEY ARE?_

**I had hoped not to get too many pure-blood maniacs today, I suppose I didn't luck out…**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Not all Slytherins are evil! Just most of them in Harry's era are... well, okay, all the Slytherins we've heard of, pretty much... but seriously, a quarter of the whole wizarding population can't be evil. That's too many. Oh, the houses make me think of Pottermore… and how my email is taking forever. Did you know that Rupert Grint was put in Ravenclaw? That's absurd. Ron is not a Ravenclaw, and Rupert will forever be Ron to me! Also, Tom Felton and the Phelps twins are in Hufflepuff, and Evanna Lynch is in Gryffindor. I can't imagine Draco Malfoy in Hufflepuff, but the others… I guess. Alright, I am going to post this now…**

**Oh, I just realized- now that the power is back, I'll have to go back to school! Well, at least I like school, I just don't like getting up early and going to bed early.**


	63. Percy Weasley

**A/N: Finally I get to go back to school! Lol, yes, I'm looking forward to it. :) I'm really just getting bored of reading and writing all day long… Anyway, on with the fic, because it's way past my bedtime so I need to hurry up.**

* * *

"Weasley, Percival!"

**Ah, very, very, ambitious.**

_Don't put me in Slytherin!_

**Why not?**

_I would have the reputation of being a dark wizard, and that wouldn't make a good Minister of Magic! …Plus, that's where all my family have gone._

**Ah, yes… ambition and loyalty, pride, bravery, intelligence. You could be in any house easily, but I believe it is really down to Gryffindor and Slytherin.**

_Gryffindor, it has to be._

**Very well…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Honestly, I don't see how Percy was not a Slytherin! He's so ambitious! So… I have to get up at 6 tomorrow (well, there's a 2 hour delay, so I don't have to, but I am…) and I still need to reset my alarm clock, so… that's all! :)**


	64. Peter Pettigrew

**A/N: Pettigrew really annoys me… Also, my whole 4th period class now knows that I love Draco Malfoy! Haha…**

* * *

"Pettigrew, Peter!"

_R-Remus and S-Sirius are in G-Gryffindor but I c-couldn't be…_

**Hm… you could do well in Hufflepuff, I'd say, although Gryffindor…**

_I know, no._

**No, no… it's a possibility. If you were in Gryffindor, you'd have your new friends with you… you have the potential for great things, bravery included. In Hufflepuff, I just don't feel you could reach your full potential...**

_Y-you're putting me in G-Gryffindor?_

**_GRYFFINDOR!_**

**What do you think?**

* * *

**A/N: I had to make it short- I hate Pettigrew. I mean, sure, he might've been forgiven in the afterlife (depending on what it's like in HP world, he could've just gone to… we'll just say Hades) by the Marauders, but I'll never like that rat.**


	65. Regulus Black

**A/N: So… um… I know I'm late… but… barely. : ) Anyway, I think I'll have to make this relatively quick, so I can hurry up and actually do something with my friend here… :P**

* * *

"Black, Regulus!"

**Another Black… are you like your brother, or the vast majority of your family? In other words, Gryffindor or Slytherin?**

_What if I'm neither?_

_I can tell you aren't too loyal- no offense, but it's not your greatest quality. You just aren't quite as book-smart as Rowena liked._

_Oh… well… I don't know._

**You are very cunning, with plenty of ambition, but you have great potential to be brave…**

_Well, Sirius said Gryffindor is best, but… I can't disappoint the family! Mother would be devastated if both of her boys were in Gryffindor… she really does love Sirius, I think, she only wishes he would get out of his rebellious stage._

**I believe you may be right about that. So, basically, you must choose- Gryffindor or Slytherin, Sirius or the rest of the Blacks?**

_I… I don't know…_

**Where do you feel you'd do best?**

_W-well… Slytherin._

**Good luck… Sirius can hold a grudge.**

**_SLYTHERIN!_  
**

* * *

**A/N: And comes years of hatred… I love Regulus. :) Then I also love Sirius…**


	66. Remus Lupin

**A/N: I love Cleverbot. 'Will you marry me?' 'Yes.' 'I love you.' 'Are you lilly evans.' 'No, I am Severus Snape, you are Lily Evans.' 'Yes. Always.'**

**Cleverbot supports Snape/Lily too! :D Always! So… er… let's get on with the story, shall we?**

* * *

"Lupin, Remus!"

**A werewolf, at Hogwarts? That's a first!**

_P-please don't tell anyone._

**Why would I tell someone, when you clearly don't want anyone to know?**

_Because I'm a dark and dangerous creature._

**Only once a month! You seem like a very nice person whenever you're yourself!**

_Well… you know I'm a _werewolf_, right?_

**Of course I know that!**

_Do you know what a werewolf is?_

**Of course I do! But listen, the wolf inside may be bad, but you are not a bad person!**

_I'm. A. Werewolf._

**You need to get it into your head you are a perfectly fine boy.**

_That… sounds slightly odd coming from your… fabric._

**Oh, come on, don't be ridiculous.**

_Well, it does._

**Which house do you want to be in?**

_Changing the subject, eh? Well, I've never thought about a house, but I guess Slytherin is where dark people usually go… I'd never have a chance in Gryffindor._

**Really? You are quite brave, you know.**

_I... I am?_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**Of course.  
**

* * *

**A/N: I hate how Remus thinks so low of himself because of his lycanthropy… well, at least, he does in just about every fanfic I've read about him, and I've read a lot of them. :)**


	67. Rita Skeeter

**A/N: 304 reviews… you guys are awesome! :D I didn't even expect 100!**

* * *

"Skeeter, Rita!"

**Ah, a real ear for gossip, I see… and very good at creative writing. Perhaps Ravenclaw?**

_No, no, no, no, no! I will not be a nerd, thank you very much!_

**Yes… forget I said that, you are not bookish enough. Unfortunately, there isn't a house for good writers.**

_Well, put me in Slytherin! That's where all the smart and cool kids go!_

**Is it now? I never knew, and I sorted them all!**

_Well then you must be a lunatic!_

**Excuse me? I could put you in Ravenclaw, you know.**

_No!_

**Alright… I'll admit there is only one house for you.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_Yes!_

* * *

**A/N: We did the funniest thing in Social Studies today… we started reviewing culture, so we got this worksheet about a foreign culture- the Nacirema. It said all sorts of stuff about their habits- spending hours in private shrines and putting all their trust in the latipsoh (healing shrine). They had people who made holes in their teeth even bigger before stuffing them with magical ingredients and when they were sick they had more magical ingredients. So, we had to come up with 3 words to describe them- most people got stupid. (I got unique, spiritual, and interesting.) The catch? This culture is really… Americans! An outside culture's view on us… American backwards=Nacirema. Hospital backwards=latipsoh. LOL. It was hilarious how everyone called themselves stupid, unhealthy, idiotic, etc. except me and a few others. : )**

**Okay, this is ridiculously long- I just couldn't help sharing. : ) The A/N is probably longer than the chapter. :P**


	68. Ron Weasley

**A/N: My computer is being evil! First, my desktop background disappeared, then my song on Youtube suddenly changed to some blank page… Anyway, here's the chapter, before my bedtime for once!**

* * *

"Weasley, Ronald!"

_I'm probably in Gryffindor, aren't I?_

**I don't just decide in 3 seconds!**

_How do you explain Malfoy?_

**That was 4 seconds.**

_Wow, big difference._

**It sure is.**

_So, am I in Gryffindor? It's been, like, 20 seconds._

**It's been 18 seconds.**

_Whatever, am I in Gryffindor?_

**Hm…**

_Oh, come on!_

**I imagine you wish to be in Slytherin?**

_NO!_

**Ah… well, good, as you don't belong in Slytherin, or Ravenclaw, for that matter.**

_Good! And I'm a Weasley, so I'm in Gryffindor… see my logic?_

**No, I don't. Just because you're from a long line of pure-blood wizards who were mostly in the same house doesn't mean you are in that house. Honestly, you're acting like one of those Slytherin pure-bloods you despise so much. Malfoy, for example.**

_I AM NOT! And bravery and stuff is from genetics!_

**Not necessarily.**

_Well, whatever, just sort me!_

**Touchy.**

_I swear-_

**If I don't sort you, you'll burn me?**

_How'd you guess?_

**A- I'm a Legilimens. B- Lots of kids say that.**

_HURRY UP AND SORT ME!_

**I think… ah, very loyal! Congrats, you are the first Weasley to be sorted into Helga's house.**

_…Hufflepuff?_

**Got a problem with that?**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_What?_

**I thought you said you'd be in Gryffindor? Glad I didn't say Ravenclaw!**

_OI!_**  
**

* * *

**A/N: Hm, that's a long one! : ) Oh, and everyone who said my social studies class is interesting- it is, but you haven't met my science teacher! I swear, he's insane… he reminds me of Bill Nye. And this isn't elementary school… lol.**


	69. Rubeus Hagrid

**A/N: I seriously didn't even realize it was 1 am… I thought it was 11 pm! So, now I'm updating… :P**

**Oh, and I know Hagrid's dialect isn't very good… well, I tried.**

* * *

"Hagrid, Rubeus!"

**It's been a while since someone's eyes haven't been covered by me!**

_Well, I don't expect ye have very many half-giants at Hogwarts._

**No, no, we don't.**

_Didn't think so._

**Yes. Now, which house do you wish to be in?**

_Well, Gryffindor sounds nice, but I'm not sure if I could get in._

**You are very brave, so why not?**

_I'm not brave._

**Yes, you are…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

A/N: Yeah… that's it. :P


	70. Sybill Trelawney

**A/N: Originally, I was going to sort Seamus, but I just feel like writing about the old fraud... : )**

* * *

"Trelawney, Sybill!"

_My prediction is that I'll be in Gryffindor._

**You must not be a Seer, because that is not where you belong.**

_I am a Seer and I will be in Gryffindor!_

**Sorry, but you are not a Seer and there is not a brave bone in your body, no offense.**

_I WILL BE IN GRYFFINDOR!_

**Calm down! You. Do. Not. Belong. In. Gryffindor.**

_YOU- ah, I see it now, I do not indeed belong in Gryffindor._

**Nice change of mind…**

_The Inner Eye is still young, so of course it will make mistakes from time to time until I mature._

**Right… so, now which house do you wish to be in?**

_Well… the Inner Eye isn't telling me which house I'll be in, so… I don't know. Perhaps Ravenclaw, that's where my Seer ancestor was, Cassandra Trelawney._

**Yes, that is true. You could be quite intelligent if you applied yourself somewhere besides Divination… but it's not quite right, and you aren't cunning at all. You'll work hard to get a stronger Inner Eye, Hufflepuff would work.**

_I don't have a problem with that._

**Good.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: This took me so long to write, but only because I somehow ended up looking at HP Wiki for an hour or so. -_-' That site's addicting.**


	71. Seamus Finnigan

**A/N: I really need to go to bed, so sorry if it's short…**

* * *

"Finnigan, Seamus!"

_Gryffindor, Gryffindor…_

**Hufflepuff?**

_What?_

**I said Hufflepuff.**

_Why?_

**…Do you _really_ need to know that?**

_Yes._

**Wonderful. Well, I said it for no apparent reason.**

_Oh._

**Yes.**

_Is there a house for accidental pyromaniacs?_

**You know there isn't.**

_True, true… well, Gryffindor is red, like fire, right…?_

**Fire isn't just red, take a Muggle art class! Anyway, I have the impression that you wish to be in Hufflepuff.**

_No! I want to be in Gryffindor! I'd wrestle a troll to get in!_

**Would you really?**

_Yes!_

**Ah… I see truth in your mind. That can only mean one thing…**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Thanks!_

* * *

**A/N: Is it just me, or is he the first person to thank the Hat…?**


	72. Severus Snape

**A/N: I was just about to go to bed when I realized I forgot to update… :P**

* * *

"Snape, Severus!"

_Why did you put her in Gryffindor?_

**Lily Evans, you mean?**

_Yes._

**Well, because she belonged there, of course.**

_She does not! We should have been in Slytherin! _Together!

**Sorry, but Miss Evans is not a Slytherin.**

_She is too!_

**No, she is not. I've been sorting children for centuries, so I might just have a clue…**

_We belong together! Now she could end up with Potter or Black for all I know! We might not even be friends if I'm in Slytherin, which I know I will be!_

**Calm down, you can still be friends.**

_A Gryffindor and a Slytherin friends? _Please.

**Who said you're in Slytherin?**

_You will._

**Ah, I see, you can read my mind…**

_Well, I do know Legilimency._

**That's impressive, for someone your age. You'll grow up to be a very accomplished Legilimens, that's for sure. Now, I'm afraid I must sort you.**

_Fine… I… I don't even mind Gryffindor if it means I'm with Lily._

**Alas, you do not belong there… I apologize, but it must be done.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Poor Sev… I love him. :') I like to think he and Lily got together romantically in the afterlife… I will admit I'm not a big fan of James anymore.**

**Whoa… I just realized something. The song that's stuck in my head kinda-sorta-maybe relates to Snape. Odd… (Face Down, by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus…) Although I actually think of characters from a TV show who don't even relate to the song, thanks to a songfic. :P**


	73. Sirius Black

**A/N: We'll be starting NextGen before October, I believe… :D I can't believe I've kept this going since February. Only 3 more left to sort before I make sure I haven't forgotten anybody, then move on to NextGen- so, if you've noticed anyone besides Sirius, Oliver Wood, and Flitwick who you want done, make sure you tell me!**

* * *

"Black, Sirius!"

_Before you sort me, I'm not just another Black! Please don't put me in Slytherin!_

**Why not?**

_If I'm in Slytherin everyone will just assume I hate Muggle-borns, Muggles, and Half-bloods, and that's not true! Plus, I want to be with my new friends, and I know they aren't Slytherins…_

**Ah, putting your friends before your family. Not a Slytherin trait at all. You really aren't ambitious either, but you can be cunning.**

_Just please don't put me in Slytherin! Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff is fine, and Gryffindor sounds awesome!_

**Don't worry, you don't belong in Slytherin. Or Ravenclaw, for that matter.**

_Thank you so much!_

**Just stating the truth. Now, if you are brave, and can handle the wrath of your family, you are a Gryffindor. If you aren't quite so brave, and can't handle the wrath of your family but will get it anyway, you are a Hufflepuff.**

_So, it's a lose-lose, or a win-win, depending on how you look at it._

**That's correct. Now, Gryffindor or Hufflepuff?**

_You're letting me choose?_

**Just seeing where you think you should be.**

_I… Gryffindor._

**I agree. Glad you chose wisely.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I love Sirius… but if JKR wrote a series about the Marauders, I think it should center around Peter. Why? So we can figure out why he went bad! 'Peter Pettigrew and the Year I Made Some Friends. Peter Pettigrew and the Year My Best Friend Is A Werewolf! Peter Pettigrew and the Year I Started to Become an Animagus. Peter Pettigrew and the Year You-Know-Who Made It Big. Peter Pettigrew and the Year I Became an Animagus. Peter Pettigrew and the Year Snape Was Almost Killed By Remus Because of Sirius. Peter Pettigrew and the Year I Joined the Order of the Phoenix and the Death Eaters.' Not sure if it's chronologically correct, but it's funny. :P Alright, this author's note is too long, so good-bye for now!**

**Oh, one last thing- for those of you who read Sirius angst- ever realize his initials are SOB? Kinda odd... I know someone whose initials are RED. Lol.**


	74. Oliver Wood

**A/N: My goodness, I got to page 3 of the reviews before they were old ones! That's a lot all of a sudden! : ) So, I looked up the rest of the characters, and it'll be another 22 chapters after this one before I do NextGen. And since I realized AVPM would be really out by then, along with all our music, TV, movies, and just culture… I think it'll be easier to write. AVPM… mwahahaha. (What the…? I just typed an evil laugh and spellcheck changed it to maharaja! What is that? *looks it up* an Indian prince?) The Scarf of Sexual Preference. Okay, I'm going to get writing! : )**

* * *

"Wood, Oliver!"

**I haven't seen someone so big on Quidditch since…**

_1982 B.C?_

**…1982 _A.D._**

_…Oh. Well… is there a house for Quidditch?_

**You know there isn't.**

_Yeah. So, Gryffindor? I hear Charlie Weasley is the best player Hogwarts has seen in years!_

**I believe you are correct. He is quite the fanatic.**

_Yeah, he's in Gryffindor, so I should be too._

**Wonderful logic… do you consider yourself brave, chivalrous, loyal?**

_Yes, all of those._

**Great. I agree.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Okay, not sure if I'll be able to update Saturday… I have a birthday party to attend, then I might be having a sleepover with someone else… so, unless I update early in the day, or am not allowed to have the sleepover, I probably won't be updating. But if that happens, I'll update Sunday.**


	75. Filius Flitwick

**A/N: Okay, I will be updating Saturday. I'll have time even if it's technically Sunday morning. Now, since I have nothing to say, I'll just go ahead and write!**

**Oh, wait! Happy birthday Tom Felton! :D (And my friend, and my language arts teacher!)**

* * *

"Flitwick, Filius!"

**It must not be easy being so short.**

_Why does everyone comment on my height?_

**Well, excuse me!**

_No, no, just sort me!_

**Where do you wish to be sorted?**

_Ravenclaw…_

**Why?**

_I don't know, I just like the house._

**Ah…**

_Well…_

**Yes…**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: My brother got a half-stack (amplifier) today… My ears are going to fall off, I swear it. :/ Anyway… Those of you who remember Goyle's sorting- Slytherins are particularly good finders.**


	76. Pomona Sprout

**A/N: So… here's the update. : ) Apparently there was a 'hatstall' for Flitwick… see, now, that's why I need to be in Pottermore, so I can learn these things!**

* * *

"Sprout, Pomona!"

_Please say Hufflepuff!_

**Hufflepuff.**

_You know what I mean, sort me into Hufflepuff!_

**Ah, you'd like to be in Hufflepuff? Well, then, do you have a reason?**

_Well, the other houses are just not for me. I'm not brave, smart, or cunning, but I am very loyal and hardworking. I belong in Hufflepuff._

**I see.**

_Do I have you convinced?_

**You are no Slytherin!**

_Er… that doesn't answer my question._

**Yes, yes, it does.**

_Okay…_

**No, I am not insane.**

_If you say so._

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_You aren't insane!_

* * *

**A/N: Off to check my email again! :P**


	77. Garrick Ollivander

**A/N: Haha, I know it's not time to update, but I got into Pottermore! I'm in Slytherin! I put a bunch of stuff on my profile about it if you want more info… but I am so happy with my wand, and I found out today is Ollivander's birthday, so I just had to sort him today. : )**

* * *

"Ollivander, Garrick!"

_I feel as though I belong in Ravenclaw, not to sound egotistic._

**Why do you feel so?**

_I believe I am highly knowledgeable in wandlore for one so young, and 'highly knowledgeable' and 'intelligent' are quite similar._

**I see your point, but you would do well in Slytherin as well… you are clearly destined for greatness.**

_Why, thank you. However, I must say, I believe Rowena's house better suits me than Salazar and Merlin's._

**You actually know about Merlin's house? Few students do.**

_Yes, yes, I do. My mother was in Slytherin, so naturally, she knows all of its achievements._

**Naturally.**

_I don't belong in Gryffindor or Hufflepuff, do I?_

**No, you certainly do not. I must agree with you…**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_Thank you._

* * *

**A/N: Slytherin isn't evil, it's for cunning, ambitious, sly, people who will achieve greatness. That's what Gemma the Slytherin prefect told me on Pottermore… and Merlin was in Slytherin! Anyway, I got the house I wanted, so I'm really happy. :D And my wand is Yew, Dragon Heartstring core, 12 ½ inches, slightly springy. Add me if you want, I'm GhostSword48. And, that's all! Sorry if you haven't gotten into Pottermore and these author's notes are getting you down.**


	78. Susan Bones

**A/N: Pottermore never does load… but I'm preoccupied with my new facebook HP page (7 likes and 3 admins… XP ), writing this, writing my other story, homework, and lots of other stuff… On a brighter note- I preordered The Son of Neptune from Barnes and Noble! :D Even better- my mom bought it for me! That means I'll still be able to buy Beautiful Chaos… next week? Whenever I get it! All the other books that come out this year that I want to read will have to wait for Christmas…**

* * *

"Bones, Susan!"

_I think I know where I belong._

**Where?**

_Ravenclaw. I'm smart, just not with Potions or Defense Against the Dark Arts._

**Well, not bad reasoning… But it takes more than brains to achieve Ravenclaw. You have to truly be an intelligent, witty learner. Plenty of Slytherins, Gryffindors, and Hufflepuffs are book-smart as well.**

_I suppose so… but do I belong there? Or in my parents' house, Hufflepuff?_

**Or in Gryffindor or Slytherin?**

_No, no! I don't wish to be involved in such a rivalry!_

**A trait shared by both Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, or most of them. I imagine that's why those two houses don't have a rivalry…**

_They do conflict in ways, don't they?_

**Yes.**

_So, I couldn't be in Hufflepuff._

**Ah, but you are fiercely loyal to those you love, and you'll work hard to achieve greatness, not have it handed to you with a bit of trickery like a Slytherin. Are those not Hufflepuff traits?**

_I suppose they are._

**Well spotted.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: According to Pottermore, Slytherins are destined for greatness- now that's more proof that My Immortal sucks! Enoby wasn't destined for greatness! :P Anyway, I don't believe that any one house is destined for greatness, I think they have to work for it, even if they are a pure-blood with a long line of pure-blood ancestors. (Draco… I'm talking to you.) I want to be an author when I grow up. If I just sat down and wrote a bunch of nonsense, even being a Slytherin, I wouldn't make millions from that! Just as a Hufflepuff- JKR is one- could do anything great! So could a Ravenclaw or Gryffindor (Harry!) of course. Now, I'm off to make my Christmas list!**


	79. Vincent Crabbe

**A/N: I'm starting to really hate that song 'Party Rock Anthem'… it keeps getting stuck in my head! :P On the bright side, this is the first weekend in a while that I don't have homework!**

* * *

"Crabbe, Vincent!"

_Put me in Ravenclaw!_

**You really do _not_ belong in Ravenclaw… no offense.**

_But I need to befriend the smart people so we can figure out what number 7 means!_

**In Arithmancy?**

_Yes!_

**Ah… I see, you have a hidden talent for the 'hardest' branch of magic.**

_Yes, and I wanna know what 7 stands for!_

**Don't we all…**

_Yeah!_

**Well, you truly are not a Ravenclaw or Gryffindor. You aren't hardworking, except for when it comes to Arithmancy, and you are loyal to those… above you. You'd have a chance in Hufflepuff.**

_No way! Slytherin, if not Ravenclaw!_

**If you insist… just remember I'm not sorting you just because of your choice. You can choose your path- don't let Draco Malfoy choose for you.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: The idea of Crabbe being good at Arithmancy is not my idea, it's from a fic I love. It's called 'A Necessary Gift: A Harry Potter Story' by cosette-aimee. Harry dies and is sent to another world, where there is just one key difference from his own world- the Harry Potter of that world died at age… was it 4...? In a car accident. It's really good.**


	80. Marietta Edgecombe

**A/N: At the moment I want nothing more than for it to be Tuesday! (SoN!) I'm so excited… it makes me want to go to school already, just because school days go by quicker than weekends! :P Also, fyi, The Mysterious Benedict Society is an awesome series. I'm on the second book, and it's nearly impossible to put it down! : )**

* * *

"Edgecombe, Marietta!"

_My parents would be most displeased if I was sorted into a house other than Ravenclaw, please sort me there._

**Excluding your parent's thoughts, why do you wish to be in Ravenclaw?**

_Well, Gryffindors are rash, Hufflepuffs are just plain dumb, and Slytherins are evil! Ravenclaws are smart, witty, and sensible!_

**Not necessarily sensible, and not all Gryffindors are rash, most Hufflepuffs are not dumb, and most Slytherins are not evil. Although many Slytherins would insult the other houses…**

_NO! I have to be in Ravenclaw!_

**Since you caught on to what I was suggesting, you must have a bit of intelligence in there…**

_Quite more than a bit, I say!_

**I suppose you are correct… but have you taken an IQ test?**

_A what?_

**I don't suppose you have.**

_Of course not! What is it anyway?_

**A muggle test of intelligence.**

_Like a single test would determine one's intelligence! Muggles are so naïve!_

**You must realize that just as not all muggles are naïve, not all wizards are not naïve.**

_Well, no Ravenclaws are naïve!_

**Really?**

_Yes._

**Could you write a 5 foot essay on that?**

_I could write a 10 foot essay on that._

**An essay far taller than any human or partial human, with the exception of half-giants?**

_Of course. If I had Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem, I'd be smarter even than her._

**Vanity is a Slytherin trait, you must realize.**

_I am not vain!_

**Oh, brother…**

_Okay, people are starting to look at me strangely! Just sort me please!_

**Alright, I suppose you are a hatstall. Ravenclaw or Slytherin, it's your choice…**

_Ravenclaw, duh!_

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: She can just be a Slytherclaw. :P At least she'll always be winning in Pottermore! Lol. Last I checked, Slytherin was winning. :D**


	81. Penelope Clearwater

**A/N: Yeah, I know I didn't update… no reason, really… :P I've just been busy doing nothing… : )**

* * *

"Clearwater, Penelope!"

**Aren't you a bit young for that?**

_What?_

**What's been going through your mind, of course! Aren't you a bit young to be angry at someone for dating the 15 year-old Muggle boy you have a crush on?**

_No. I'm quite mature for my age._

**I see.**

_So, of course, I wish to be in Ravenclaw, as maturity and intelligence, like with most, run hand in hand with me._

**I see. However, you are also quite ambitious.**

_If I'm in Slytherin, my chances at politics are ruined, I'll have a bad reputation._

**True, true…**

_So, please place me in Ravenclaw._

**I am afraid I must, as otherwise you won't have nearly as much potential at being the Minister of Magic, unfortunately.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

**But you are really a Slytherclaw.**

* * *

**A/N: If that dating thing was random, just know that I'm listening to Avril Lavigne, so that's what comes into my mind… Well, I'd better go start packing my bags since I'll only have an hour and a half tomorrow before my sleepover… : ) I would make it longer if I had more time.**


	82. Orion Black

**A/N: I only got about 5 hours of sleep last night… : ( Now I'm tired… as in about to fall asleep while writing this. XP So it will have to be short.**

* * *

"Black, Orion!"

**Ah, very easy.**

_Slytherin, please!_

**Don't fret, it's a simple choice.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Well… yeah… kind of pathetic. I'll probably do a longer one next time.**


	83. Sir Nicholas de MimsyPorpington

**A/N: Yay, I'm officially going to be Lily Evans for Halloween! My grandma bought me red hairspray. (I have brown hair, so I don't look like Lily at all… I look like Hermione a bit.) I'll have to wear my dad's old bathrobe though, lol.**

**Okay, I dearly hope Nick wasn't before the Hat's time…**

* * *

"de Mimsy-Porpington, Nicholas!"

**Quite the fancy name, lad.**

_Indeed, however, I am proud of my family name._

**Splendid.**

_Indeed. I desire to be sorted into Gryffindor house… do I fit the characteristics?_

**You seem to be quite chivalrous, and you are brave. Loyal to your family and friends, as well.**

_That sounds wonderful._

**Yes, a true Gryffindor… I should shout it out before Godric Gryffindor's sword falls on your head.**

_Good one._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**Why, thank you.**

* * *

**A/N: I have no idea if that's what people really talked like back then… XP It's even harder to write old-tyme talk when listening to Evanescence and Avril Lavigne… not so old.**


	84. Cuthbert Binns

**A/N: I got the Son of Neptune today finally! :D I'm on chapter 4 (I had to finish my other book first, then homework and stuff, then I could read…) and it's already really good! I think my favorite part is having Percy's humor back. Maybe not in 1st person pov, but I love him so much more than Jason and Piper… Leo is close, but I like Percy a bit better. : ) Just a bit.**

**And that had NOTHING to do with Harry Potter… or this story…**

* * *

"Binns, Cuthbert!"

**So… which house do you wish to be in?**

_Wherever I'll be the smartest, I guess… I'm always bored, so I learn… sleep… eat… and learn…_

**I see. Ravenclaw _would_ be good for you. Not Gryffindor or Slytherin, and Hufflepuff… well… no.**

_So, Ravenclaw then…?_

**I suppose so. Just please try to add some interest to your life.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: I can't find him too interesting. Lol. It's short because I want to check my story alerts and respond to my messages, maybe go on facebook, before my bedtime in 2 minutes… XP**


	85. Walburga Black

**A/N: Hello! …I don't really have anything to say at the moment.**

* * *

"Black, Walburga!"

_I simply must be in Slytherin; there is no other way to be a respectable pure-blood._

**But what if you don't belong in Slytherin?**

_I do, so that is not even a question to be asked._

**Sadly, I must say you aren't in Gryffindor or Hufflepuff, so your wish is a possibility.**

_Sadly?_

**Er, ignore that.**

_Fine. I refuse to be a Ravenclaw, by the way. They are all a bunch of smart-alecks._

**Whether you refuse, accept, or bring in a hundred lawyers I'll still sort you into the correct house, which is**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_What's a lawyer?_

* * *

**A/N: Wow… I looked it up, and Walburga's maiden name is actually Black. Incest… :/ My great-grandma's maiden name was the same as her married name, but that was pure coincidence.**


	86. Mundungus Fletcher

**A/N: Now I can't wait for Tuesday, even though I haven't finished The Son of Neptune… Beautiful Chaos, the 3rd book in the Caster Chronicles, comes out! And I'm going to ask my dad to get it at Barnes and Noble, which is 45 minutes away but near his work, so I don't have to wait until 8 DAYS AFTER IT COMES OUT. *coughSonofNeptunecough***

* * *

"Fletcher, Mundungus!"

**Ah, a very sneaky and cunning young boy you are.**

_Yeah… so, just shout out Slytherin._

**I must make sure it is right for you… you aren't at all brave or intellectual, no offense. Not very hardworking either, so I suppose you were correct when you guessed your house.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: This one couldn't be too long- it was just too obvious. XP**


	87. Phineas Yaxley

**A/N: And I'm updating early! I have to go to the local talent show, because my brother's in it, and that means I'll have about an hour of freetime tomorrow. So, with homework and wanting to relax a bit, I won't be able to update tomorrow.**

* * *

"Yaxley, Phineas!

_I am a cunning pure-blood, so I must be in-_

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_I didn't even finish!_

**I know.**

* * *

**A/N: I just borrowed his name from a (possible) ancestor, because he only has a surname… This is too short, but I'm out of time, so I must go…**


	88. Zacharias Smith

**A/N: Oh wonderful! There's a freaking sex offender who lives 3 houses away from me… now I feel safe. :/ I could give you details, but… for all I know he could be reading this right now! Since he keeps guns in his house and tries to kidnap his victims to bring them into the woods and (similar to 'ripe') them, I don't want to be his next victim, if you know what I mean… Well, I guess I won't be going for walks anymore!**

* * *

"Smith, Zacharias!"

_I must be in Hufflepuff, for she was my ancestor._

**Very well, I cannot argue… you really couldn't belong anywhere else as it is. Perhaps Slytherin, but all the teasing because of your ancestor would crush that ambition.**

_Obviously._

**_HUFFLEPUFF!_**

* * *

**A/N: So… all that's on my mind tonight is in the above author's note, and he's lived in 90 places, so… remember that. Not all of them are in my state. Also, on a brighter note, I started a Percy Jackson story similar to my other Harry Potter story 'Who Would Win In A Duel?'. It's on my profile page if you're interested. : ) Call me crazy for having 3 or 4 stories going at once… well, one of them is going to be deleted, after I fix some things up with the last one so that it can just stay a trilogy. (I simply have lost all inspiration for it, plus no one reads it, and I don't blame them because it's so bad!)**

**Okay, I'm sorry I'm late! The doc manager kept crashing, so I couldn't update… :/**


	89. Gideon Prewett

**A/N: Oh, I was just about to say sorry I'm late for updating! But I'm not late! Gosh, don't ever try to keep up too many fics at once- my limit is definitely 2... Maybe I'll end Who Would Win in a Duel soon… but not this one. : ) I have to sort everyone, because that's been my goal since February 2011 or whenever it was when I got the idea.**

* * *

"Prewett, Gideon!"

**Ah, fiercely brave and loyal. It's just too simple- Gryffindor or Hufflepuff?**

_Gryffindor, my brother's there!_

**Of course.**

**_GRYFFINDOR!_**

* * *

**A/N: Sorry about the length, I've written about 5 pages of stuff and watched Twilight today… I'm kinda tired. By the way, Kristen Stewart is the worst actor ever… she only has 1 or 2 facial expressions… XP**


	90. Fabian Prewett

**A/N: Oh my goodness… I have just finished Beautiful Chaos! I rate it 7 out of 5 stars! It is just so freaking amazing, you guys NEED to read Beautiful Creatures, then Beautiful Darkness, then Beautiful Chaos! (Then add to the oh-so-tiny fanfiction archive!) I can't give you the plot of Beautiful Chaos without spoiling it, because it's all twists and turns and 3 characters I love die… just pay attention to the shadowing songs, because they do indeed come true… I need to rant about it, but I can't give away spoilers- has anyone here read it?**

**Okay, it took me a while to update because, for those of you who aren't reading my other stories, I can't keep up 3 at once, so my new update schedule is every 3 days until I end Who Would Win In A Duel, which might be done by 2012...**

* * *

"Prewett, Fabian!"

_Please tell me I'll be in the same house as Gideon, my twin._

**I haven't sorted him yet, I can't be sure.**

_We simply have to be in the same house. Otherwise, my sumo wrestler great-great-great-great-grandfather will eat you for breakfast._

**Oh, such a threat.**

_Isn't it though? He lives in Japan. Shanghai, to be exact._

**Shanghai is in China.**

_No it's not!_

**You are a fool.**

_Oi! Molly told me it's in Japan!_

**Well, Molly told you wrong!**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_What'd I do that's brave?_

**You said 'oi'.**

* * *

**A/N: Oh, how I love the art of subtle messages… : ) Not just the one I put in this chapter (the 4 greats are 4 for a reason- Ellis Wate's home, where it all started and ended in Beautiful Chaos, the 4 amazing characters from Beautiful Chaos who either die or almost die, the fact that it's currently known that there will be 4 Caster Chronicles novels, the Mortal Instruments novels that have been released, I like 4 different TV shows, none of which are on anymore… I could go on.), but also 'There were three brothers, walking around at /twilight/-' 'Mum always said midnight.' Haha. Twilight… Twilight, as in, Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn! JKR approves of Twilight bashing! Lol.**


	91. Poppy Pomfrey

**A/N: Oh my gosh… I think my friend has forced me to eat a million walnuts since she doesn't like them or can't eat them or whatever. O.o Well, it's 4 am, so I figured I'd update…**

* * *

"Pomfrey, Poppy!"

_I wish there was a house for future healers… I love healing people!_

**Well, I'm afraid there isn't one.**

_Too bad. Which house do I belong in, then?_

**Which house do you wish to be in?**

I suppose… Ravenclaw, because if I'm in Ravenclaw, that means I'm highly intellectual, and that is good for a Healer.

**Well put… I know you aren't a Hufflepuff, but you are both cunning and intelligent. You are also brave, but not quite enough for Gryffindor. I suppose you can choose- Slytherin or Ravenclaw?**

_Ravenclaw._

**Alright.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: I drew an awesome Slytherin crest today! Along with a Hufflepuff one… it's amazing how well anyone can draw by simply bringing up an image on the computer and tracing it… :P**


	92. Terry Boot

**A/N: If I'm PM-ing anyone here or reading your story, I haven't responded/reviewed in a while because I've been addicted to The Sims Medieval… it's an awesome game. : ) Soon I'll be able to stop playing long enough to really go on fanfiction, I hope.**

* * *

"Boot, Terrence!"

_My father, his father, his father, his father, and you probably get the point, were all in Hufflepuff._

**Hm… yes, but you are not too hardworking. You do so well not because of hard work, but because you are just naturally gifted.**

_I won't let that go to my head._

**Brilliant idea.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

**Not just for the idea…**

* * *

**A/N: I'm just in a good mood today for a lot of school related reasons! My math teacher changed his teaching ways, so that means a lot less homework (we only get it if he thinks we need more practice, and I'm in the AIG class, so…), then I get to not take the class where all you do is fantasy football, and instead be a tech assistant, which is a really awesome thing to be! So I'm in a good mood today. : )**


	93. Quirinus Quirrell

**A/N: And… once again, I have nothing to say. :P**

* * *

"Quirrell, Quirinus!"

**You have true intellect and wit, along with individuality, a lesser-known Ravenclaw trait.**

_So, I'm just screaming Ravenclaw, am I?_

**Indeed you are. Nice... metaphor?**

_Thank you._

**You are welcome. Just remember this- do not walk the wrong path.  
**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Wow. One chapter left until NextGen, possibly. Only problem is that I don't know if I want to continue this story immediately, because I've been writing so much and getting so little time for other stuff that I want to take a break… start again maybe Thanksgiving or Christmas. I don't know what I'll do yet. I need to decide soon though!**


	94. Amos Diggory

**A/N: I have the most dreadful news ever… this is the last chapter.**

**Now, what's our Queen's initials?**

* * *

"Diggory, Amos!"

**I see much ambition in you, boy.**

_Well… yes, I mean, if I don't keep rising in power, what am I?_

**Spoken like a true Slytherin.**

_But my father was a Hufflepuff!_

**Well, you are not one. Family does not matter a bit when it comes to being sorted. However, you just displayed another Slytherin trait- family importance.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Okay, it didn't say his house in canon, and he is NOT a Hufflepuff. Well, maybe his movie self, but not the book version. :P So, it's been nice having you all… :'(**

**(Remember- the Queen's initials!) **

**Also, today is my one-year anniversary on fanfiction. :'D 17 stories... and 2 on fictionpress. Plus one that's on both, so 19 total...**


	95. Teddy Lupin

**A/N: Haha, I love Angry Birds… :D I've finally beaten the 1st level after a whole week of playing. :P**

**Okay, only a few people at most got my Queen's initials thing. So, the Queen means JK Rowling. As in, Just Kidding, I'm not Really ending this…**

**Yes, I'm doing NextGen. : )**

**Starting right now.**

* * *

"Lupin, Theodore!"

**Your father… Remus Lupin, and your mother… they're… dead?**

_Yeah, I was just a baby, though._

**That is awful, they were both wonderful people.**

_That's what everyone tells me. I wish I could meet them._

**Hm… well, why don't you ask Professor McGonagall if you can use her Pensieve?**

_Her what?_

**I'll let her explain it, we need to get on with the sorting.**

_Okay… I want to be in either Gryffindor or Hufflepuff, in honor of my parents._

**Understandable. You possess bravery, loyalty, especially to family, fairness, hard work, intelligence, cunning, ambition, and chivalry.**

_So, which house?_

**I supppose it's your choice… Gryffindor or Hufflepuff?**

_Um… Hufflepuff, so I can help their reputation._

**Wise choice, maybe I should have considered Ravenclaw.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: Yay, that was so fun! : ) And I'm happy because there's no school tomorrow and it's 11/11/11! (On 10/10/10, I didn't even know the date until the next day, so I completely missed out...) And Veteran's day, of course. Speaking of Veteran's Day, I can relate to Teddy with not knowing family who died when I was a baby- both of my grandpas died before I was born, and my step-grandpa died when I was 2. At least I didn't have to go through the pain of losing them- that's the best part of losing relatives that young. :P**


	96. Victoire Weasley

**A/N: I think 3 is my lucky (or unlucky…) number. The third time I read the chapter 'Beyond the Veil', I almost cried. The 3rd time I watched Goblet of Fire (today :D ), I almost cried when Cedric (I love him :') ) died. And I'll go with unlucky, because a group of 3 people doesn't work out in real life. Then my lucky number is either 7 or 13. : )**

* * *

"Weasley, Victoire!"

**You have a brilliant young mind, dear.**

_Thank you. Does that mean Ravenclaw?_

**Hm… I'm not quite sure. You are also quite brave, and fiercely loyal to your family. The last trait is both Slytherin and Hufflepuff…**

_Teddy told me he was all four, too._

**Yes, you two have some chemistry, but please, you are too young for that!**

_Oh, come on…_

**You should make sure not to take advantage of people with your Veela blood, young lady.**

_Perhaps._

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

**You just proved to not be quite so chivalrous…**

* * *

**A/N: Evil Victoire! Lol.**


	97. Dominique Weasley

**A/N: Aha. It is so fun to make a playlist for the school dance! My math teacher is the DJ… XD So he asked us to give him some song suggestions… I gave him some classic rock, some pop, some Evanescence (I couldn't resist.), and an AWFUL screamo song, because it's simply hilarious. (That was my brother's suggestion, by the way…)**

* * *

"Weasley, Dominique!"

**I can see that a new generation of Weasleys is starting…**

_Yeah, I'm the second._

**Indeed… how many of you are there?**

_Um… twelve, I think._

**Oh, Merlin help me.**

_I thought you only had the founders-_

**Yes, yes, I do.**

_Okay. Speaking of the founders-_

**Not Slytherin or Gryffindor.**

_Will you ever let me finish a-_

**No.**

_Why-_

**Because I'm sick of sorting people by the time I get to the W's, so I have to play around. Well, actually, I get tired by the C's, especially in the past when there were Blacks to sort.**

_Oh, that makes-_

**Yes, it does.**

_Would you stop-_

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_You're making me want to unleash a Slytherin-_

**Go to your table!**

* * *

**A/N: This story really is the most fun to write. : ) Not that I don't like my other ones. :P Anyway, I read my first Drarry fic last night, on a reader's recommendation… and I enjoyed it! It wasn't one of those ones that's all smut, I wouldn't read that. :P It's funny, because a year ago today, I had never even thought about whether or not I support homophobia, never mind which noncanon pairings I like!**


	98. Louis Weasley

**A/N: Oh, come on, fan fiction's changed again… well, barely, but still. It's actually improved, though. (They changed the 'do you want to delete this' on the Doc Manager.) And I think I convinced my brother that not all Slytherins are evil… yay! Since he's (maybe) a Gryffindor who hasn't ever read fanfiction, that's quite an accomplishment. XP**

* * *

"Weasley, Louis!"

**Finally, a true Weasley from Bill...**

_Er, what about my sisters?_

**They aren't Gryffindors, so they aren't true Weasleys.**

_Oh. Okay. So, I'm a Gryffindor?_

**Did I not just say you are a true Weasley? Merlin, did all of the French girl's intellect go to Victoire?**

_Maybe._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Just so you know, it won't be hard to guess the order I'm doing NextGen in… I'm doing them in order of the original seven Weasleys, and I'll also do Fred's kids, because he lived and married Angelina.**

**Ah, I love Yellowcard... how the heck can my brother think they're gay? That's atrocious! (said like Tom Felton, of course)  
**


	99. Molly Weasley Jr

**A/N: I think the thing I hate most about Tara Gilesbie is that she ruined MCR for some readers… I'd have never guessed they sounded like this if I hadn't heard them on the Sims 3. :P They are about as emo as a sponge, just so you know.**

**Hm… did I already say that in this story, or am I thinking of something else…?**

* * *

"Weasley, Molly!"

It brought great joy to Minerva to realize that Percy Weasley loved his mother enough to name a child after her…

_I really don't want to be in Gryffindor._

**Why not? Most Weasleys want to be in Gryffindor.**

_Exactly! I don't want to be like everyone else!_

**I see… you could be a Ravenclaw.**

_No, that's not special enough. Victoire is there, and she's the jewel of the whole Weasley clan._

**I have to say, you have a good point. Slytherin is the only un-Weasley-inhabited house left, though.**

_So? Slytherin means ambition, cunning, power, resourcefulness, and traditionalism. Those are great qualities to have!_

**I take it you've been so cunning as to fool me into not realizing you just want Slytherin but don't want a three-second sorting?**

_Precisely._

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

**That was too crafty for me to make an excuse. I mean, you fooled _me_. I have a part of Salazar Slytherin himself implanted in me!**

* * *

**A/N: A Weasley in Slytherin! Gasp! Well, I like to think Audrey was a Slytherin, and I don't care what the Hat thinks, Percy is a Slytherin. He has more ambition than me and my dad put together, and we're both Slytherins! (And my mom and brother are Hufflepuffs… a bit of rivalry between us now. At least it's not Slytherin and Ravenclaw or Gryffindor- Pottermore and the books. : ) )**


	100. Lucille Weasley

**A/N: Crap… my laptop broke Wednesday, and I just realized that means I don't have my list of characters to sort next. :( I remember some of the order, so we'll just have to hope that it's fixed before I run out of Weasleys, Potters, Malfoys, Scamanders, and Longbottoms! Nah, it'll be fixed before the Weasleys are done. XP The only problem is that now I have to try and remember the houses they're in! Urg…**

**On the bright side- happy 100th chapter! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D Virtual cookies to every single person who's read this far in the story, even if you just started today! :)**

* * *

"Weasley, Lucille!"

**I do see some ambition in you, like your sister.**

_Okay…_

**But you aren't very cunning, so don't plan on being in Slytherin.**

_I am not complaining. Molly says Slytherin's great, but I don't like snakes, nor do I like water._

**Yes, yes. I suppose, really, you could be in Hufflepuff or Gryffindor, because while you have a hint of bravery, you are also fiercely loyal…**

_I'd rather be in Hufflepuff, so I'm unique, at least for the immediate family._

**Are you sure?**

_Yes, I said so, didn't I?_

**You are more like your sister than you'll ever know...**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_What's that supposed to mean?**  
**_

* * *

**A/N: I hope I did deem her a Hufflepuff… :P I'm pretty sure I did. Now then, I hope none of you were trampled while Black Friday shopping! I didn't do any, myself, like usual, unless you count online shopping. I know what I'm getting for Christmas. XP So far, my laptop being fixed (it'll come out of my Christmas money...), a Slytherin keychain, a Slytherin wall scroll, and Draco Malfoy's wand… :)**


	101. Fred Weasley Jr

**A/N: Yay! My laptop is almost working! It's not really working at all, but my mom found a way to hook it up to the monitor of my old desktop computer, so now I can use all my old documents and pictures! :D Well, Mozilla Firefox won't work for some reason, so I'm using Internet Explorer, but… we're almost there. : )**

* * *

"Weasley, Fred!"

It brought tears to Minerva's eyes to read the name of George's eldest son, despite knowing that something or other had happened and Fred hadn't died.

**Fred Weasley…**

_That's me, mon!_

**Really? Did your father or uncle, whichever it was, tell you to say that?**

_No, mon, I've got no idea what you're talkin' about, mon!_

**Oh, bloody hel-ck.**

_Helck, mon? Nice invention, mon!_

**I swear, you prankster Weasleys have it in for me!**

_Eh, mon, that's not nice, mon!_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**Godric, I'm sorry.**

* * *

**A/N: When I sort Fred's kids, I'll give you guys the full backstory on how he's alive. : ) Of course, you'll already know if you're reading Who Would Win in a Duel or if you read The Cloaked Woman months ago, but I know the latter sucks, and, yeah… that's it! Also, today, November 28th, is Popsicle Day- to celebrate, just have a popsicle or freeze pop! I made it up with a friend 3 or 4 years ago. :P**


	102. Roxanne Weasley

**A/N: I think I already said this… like, three times today… but if you're still using Internet Explorer, you NEED to download Mozilla Firefox. I hate IE so much, it's slower than my mom was right after her KNEE SURGERY. ON BOTH KNEES.**

**And some stupid wannabe Potterheads are faking their friends' deaths to get more likes on a facebook page… what is wrong with some people?**

**Minirant over… I'm aggravated right now, because of the internet, those stupid people, and the popcorn kernel thing stuck in my tooth! :P**

* * *

"Weasley, Roxanne!"

_I need to be in the same house as Alexis._

**Need?**

_Yes, we're best friends!_

**I see… you don't have to be in the same house to be best friends.**

_Yes we do!_

**Are you the sorting hat?**

_Yeah!_

**Bloody helck.**

_Helck?_

**Yes, helck. It's a word.**

_I see._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I've finally been sorted on MyHogwarts! Well, I got the questions- I haven't yet gotten my house! I'm nervous! :/**


	103. George Weasley Jr

**A/N: Wow, this weekend went by so fast! At least we're reading 'A Christmas Carol' in school, that makes it more bearable! :P**

**Having Fred alive is Siriusly confusing me, I keep forgetting who's who and who's mom is who!**

**And since Fred married Angelina, George married someone named Bridgette, a Ravenclaw in the year above him, who I don't feel like giving a long biography on. :P Just know that she's pretty cool.**

* * *

"Weasley, George!"

**Interesting, very interesting...**

_What, mon?_

**You have some sort of... power. I can't go into detail, because that would get me killed...**

_Whoa, now I'm interested!_

**I shouldn't have brought that up.**

_I'm glad you did, thanks! But seriously, what is my power?_

**You will find out one day, I promise. Most likely next year, when you're twelve. That's when it usually happens.**

_When what happens?_

**When... your power comes out, I suppose. I'm looking Death in the eye right now...**

_Well, you can sort me. I'll ask Dad about it._

**How did you know your mum has nothing to do with this?**

_I... I don't know! I just did!_

**Just... please, try to stay as far in the east as you can.**

_Why the east?_

**It's safer, for now.**

_What?_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_I want answers!_

* * *

**A/N: Anyone even slightly curious as to what his powers are? Haha, of course you are... he is a legacy of Pluto. Since Fred, his dad, died, he had some of the powers of the dead, so George and his sister inherited them, and are the equivalent of 7th generation demigods, while Fred is the equivalent of a 3rd generation demigod. If enough people ask, and I have time, I'll write a fic about it...**


	104. Alexis Weasley

**A/N: I swear, Youtube knows me. o.O Whenever I listen to Fall Out Boy, it gives me ads and suggestions about Harry Potter... and what's more, I found out about the band because of an amazing fic called A Compulsory Heart (it's Evil/DeathEater!Harry by the way, and some parts are hilarious while others are just plain amazing).**

**And no one said 'don't write that fic, it sounds horrible!' like I expected. Haha. Good thing I want to write it and would've written it anyway... XP I'll let you know when it's up, I don't have time today, but sometime before 2012, I'll do it. I know I'll have time over Christmas, unless my grandma randomly shows up or something, but that won't happen because she's saving for our trip to Orlando this summer! (And, of course, HP World!)**

**Alright, I know Alexis Weasley is entirely Headcanon, but I can't just NOT sort Fred's daughter...**

* * *

"Weasley, Alexis!"

**You should be dead.**

_Oh, ha ha. I'm not anything like my brother, Chiron!_

**Really...? And I'm the Sorting Hat, not some old centaur!**

_Well, not much. The point is, you will not fool me into thinking I'm a demigod! I do love Ricky though._

**Ricky?**

_Rick Riordan, as everyone else knows him. A Muggle, kind of._

**I see.**

_He's technically a son of Apollo, but he makes the Mor- the muggles believe he's one of them._

**Yes, I know! A student from two years past told me every detail about my life!**

_Who?_

**A Slytherin by the name of Hillary Davis.**

_Nobody I know._

**I'm aware of that.**

_How do you know everything?_

**Because I do.**

_Wow, that's an amazing answer._

**Sarcasm- the voice you use to pretend you were not just pwned.**

_How the heck are you so modern? You look older than Great-Great Auntie Muriel!_

**Great-Great-Great, isn't it?**

_Whatever! That's not the point, and she's a grouchy old hag anyway!_

**She is, isn't she?**

_That's not the point!_

**I will not answer your question, it's too obvious for me to answer.**

_What?_

**You heard me.**

_You- you are impossible!_

**Sorry, but you aren't Hermione Granger and I'm not Ronald Weasley.**

_You- you-_

**You cannot say you are nothing like your brother, as you possess the same gift and the same curse as he.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Tell me the stupid prophecy! I know there's one regarding me and George!_

**Pwned.**

* * *

**A/N: Haha, I now love Alexis... this story is great, it gives me some characterization of my own characters! XP Before this I had no idea what Alexis was like! So, I want to write that fanfiction... you know what, instead of writing down pointless ideas about original stories that I'll probably never write, I'll come up with an outline of The Story. First things first, though, will it be a one-shot or multi-chapter...? I'll decide after I create the plotline!**

**Because I have to mention one band TWICE in one chapter, Fall Out Boy covered Beat It by Michael Jackson (who I knew and liked before he died!)... it's awesome! :D**


	105. Rose Weasley

**A/N: I watched Twilight ages ago, and now I've finally seen New Moon, and I'm 200% team Jacob... Edward is just scary... :P Besides, Jacob seems to love her more, and it wouldn't turn Edward against Bella if she went with him- but then again, Bella doesn't have a brain to choose, does she? Plus, I've always loved werewolves, and that might have something to do with Remus, and Abraham Ravenwood (who's technically something similar to a vampire), and Jordan Kyle and Maia Roberts (who make a perfect couple).**

**Anyway, I've got just about all the songs I favorited on Youtube on my iPod now- I'm listening to music on it rather than the computer! :D I can't find my favorite song, though... maybe I'll have to look harder...**

**Oh, and I will maybe write that fic tomorrow... erm... not promising anything... I will eventually...**

* * *

"Weasley, Rose!"

_It's great and all that Al's in his house, but I don't want it._

**Why ever not?**

_I just don't feel it suits my academic requirements- and I won't be content with any house but Ravenclaw, to be honest._

**Goodness, you are demanding.**

_I am a Ravenclaw, many of us are._

**You are not a Ravenclaw yet!**

_Yet being the key word!_

**I suppose I can't argue with you, much as I'd love to.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Just to put this out there, I do ship Scorose... but he's not a Ravenclaw.**


	106. Hugo Weasley

**A/N: So, I'm in a bit of a dilemma here. Because of Hurricane Irene, we have a half-day of school Monday, then we get out. Should I even go, or should I just skip school? It's not like we'll do anything! But then again, I have perfect attendance so far (every year except kindergarten... I don't get sick easily... *knocks on wood*), and I don't want to ruin it just because I don't feel like getting up. So I have no idea what to do!**

**Okay. Here goes.**

**I PROMISE I will get that fic about George and Alexis up by... the 19th. I will go and write myself a sticky note, pausing in listening to I'm Just a Kid by Simple Plan even though I love that song... :P**

* * *

"Weasley, Hugo!"

**You, young man, are a lot like your father, I can just tell.**

_T-thanks. He's really famous-_

**No he's not, if he said that it's a load of bull- er, poo.**

_BS?_

**Why do you know that word?**

_Dad._

**Of course. His language was vulgar even back when he was 11 and I sorted him into Gryffindor.**

_Really?_

**Yep, if you stop by Dumbledore's office sometime, I could tell you some embarrassing stories. I collected them from his and his siblings' heads during their sortings, and remember them still...**

_Sweet. Thanks!_

**My pleasure.**

_So, where will I be sorted?_

**You have Slytherin qualities, but I think you'd do well in Gryffindor.**

_Really?_

**Yes. Where would you like to go?**

_Gryffindor._

**Alright, suit yourself.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Hm, something random just came to me that I have to share. My brother is annoying me lately, because he keeps replying to every comment I make on a Youtube video- like, when I said "I love the way this guy sings!" he replied saying "gay", and when I said that the lead singer of Yellowcard looks like Tom Felton (HE DOES) and put a 3 next to it, he said gay in person! Then I say I love the way the lead singer of Fall Out Boy says 'let the good times roll' in Thanks for the Memories, and what does he say but gay, of course! He's being really immature for a 19 year old, I think... :P**

**Rant over, since I kind of had to study for a vocab quiz thus didn't get to follow my new schedule and update early. Hey, at least I have an excuse this time, right?**

**I have to say, I think the sorting hat is a Slytherin. Especially in this chapter, just offering Hugo embarrassing stories! I had a perfect word to describe it, but I can't think of the word right now... hate when that happens.**


	107. James Sirius Potter

**A/N: I think I will go to school on Monday, but not because of any reasons I've mentioned before- because I know I'll be bored by Wednesday, so going to school will delay it a bit, and I won't be bored on Christmas! According to the school librarian, they were supposed to be showing a movie, but the library's carpet is being replaced, so they might not be able to get in the library to play the movie... so who knows what we're doing? One of my teachers didn't even have anything planned for today, never mind Monday! (We ended up watching How the Grinch Stole Christmas and doing a word search.)**

* * *

"Potter, James..." Minerva simply could not say that name with an exclamation point anymore; he was dead... and had been for a while.

**James Sirius Potter... please tell me you are nothing like your namesakes.**

_The Marauders? They're- we're- awesome!_

**I fear for Professor McGonagall, I must warn her at the end of the sorting.**

_Oi! She doesn't need a warning!_

**I suppose that's true, your name is a giveaway.**

_Hmph, Al is lucky, his name sucks and all but it doesn't give him a reputation..._

**Being named after arguably the greatest wizard of all time doesn't give one a reputation? Which planet are you from?**

_Erm... Narnia._

**That's another world; Pluto is still our world, Narnia is not.**

_Fine._

**Rather than discussing lions, witches, and wardrobes, let's sort you.**

_Gryffindor._

**Why, hello, Mr. Sorting Hat!**

_Ha ha ha._

**Oh, a sarcastic hat, eh?**

_I could say the same to you._

**Of course, of course.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: There's this one present under my Christmas tree that's heavy and fairly large, maybe about 1 foot by 1.5 feet or something like that, and my mom said it's fragile... any idea what it might be? I'm trying to figure it out!**

**Oh, and today in the library at school I noticed there's a notebook with the Hogwarts crest on it saying Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titalindus (sp?)... and I cracked up when someone asked 'What is a Hufflepuff?' XD He knew it was a house, though, and he knows the traits, he just took a while to figure out it's a badger. Still, AVPM anyone?**


	108. Albus Potter

**A/N: Lol, I have 3 followers on tumblr and their usernames all start with L... XP One of them I actually know in person, although not too well XP She's just the only other person I know who has a Tumblr.**

**And I will write that fic today, I promise! And if I don't (I suck at keeping promises to people I don't know in person, sorry...) it'll be up... um... before Christmas. Not tomorrow, probably, because my friend's sleeping over...**

**I now officially love Tuna... erm, Tom/Luna, not the food...**

* * *

"Potter, Albus!"

_Not Slytherin, not Slytherin, not Slytherin..._

**Harry Potter? Oops, sorry, you reminded me of your father.**

_Did I? Then I'm a Gryffindor right?_

**...Not necessarily.**

_Not-_

**Slytherin, I know. Even though you were named after one, and he's one of the bravest kids I've ever sorted.**

_Dad? Oops, sorry, you reminded me of my father._

**Oh, how funny. Would you kill me if I sorted you into Slytherin?**

_Perhaps._

**Hm... hope they know what to do without me. Sorry, but it's perfect for you.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

**Not all Slytherins are evil!**

* * *

**A/N: Sometimes I hate always having a song stuck in my head... I went from My Chemical Romance to Rebecca Black... her new song that's worse than Friday, specifically. :/**

**Forget my promise to write that fic today, will you? There's 8 minutes left in today... but I will try to write it before Christmas!**


	109. Lily Potter

**A/N: I've discovered two good things about Grand Theft Auto... one- you learn how to drive (erm... learn how to crash, blow things up, and die if you're me...), and two, you can hear new music if your car lives long enough to hear the radio! XP I've discovered, like, 4 songs from this game already(A Horse With No Name, Been Caught Stealing, Hellraiser, Cult of Personality), and one is now on my iPod... (A Horse With No Name)**

**I guess I forgot to write that fic... sticky notes didn't work... um... I'll write it... before New Year's? I don't know... just keep reminding me, and I might write it sooner. Not sure if it'll work though.**

* * *

"Potter, Lily!"

_After I'm sorted, there is the Scarf of Sexual Preference to sort me too, right?_

**A Very Potter Musical and Hogwarts have just about nothing in common. Darren Criss was even a Slytherin!**

_What? He's a wizard?_

**Yes.**

_Maybe someday I can marry him! Yay!_

**Oh no, rabid fangirl...**

_Oi! I'm not rabid! I once had a bunny that was rabid, though, we had to put him to sleep..._

**That's too bad.**

_Isn't it? I loved him, his name was Death Muncher!_

**Very similar to a follower of Lord Voldy.**

_Dad came up with the name._

**Did he? How amusing.**

_Considering he spent his whole childhood just about fighting Voldy-shorts! Anyway, can you sort me already? I want to go to Hogwarts, to-_

**No AVPM references. Which house do you want to be in?**

_Hm... I'm not a good guy, so no Gryffindor, I'm not bad, so not Slytherin, and the third house... well, what the hell is a Hufflepuff?_

**You're a bit young to be using that word!**

_So?_

**Sigh... Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders!**

_I am a very good finder!_

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: I've been wanting to write AVPM reference-chapter since... I don't know, April? :)**


	110. Lorcan Scamander

**A/N: Hey, guess what that strange package I think I asked you about was? A new laptop! :D I'm using it right now, but there is just one small problem... it doesn't have Microsoft Works! That's what I've always used for writing! Although now that I'm using WordPad, I think I like it better. Well, hopefully I'll have enough Christmas money to buy Microsoft Word... that'd be even better! **

**I also got a Slytherin scarf, wall scroll, and keychain :) Along with Draco's wand, the 3rd Witch and Wizard book, a couple of Sims games, clothes, makeup, gum, another scarf (not HP related though), a bracelet, DH part 2 DVD, and... there might be more, I'm not sure... **

**Well, Christmas isn't all about gifts, obviously! Merry Christmas even if it's technically the 26th now, and Happy Kwanzaa because I think that's today! If anyone even celebrates it anymore... I'll have to go open my old computer now so I can get the list for what to write... otherwise I'm confused! :)**

**Whoa, you guys sure do love AVPM don't you? :) Don't we all, though? Maybe I'll have another chararacter mention Lauren Lopez or someone... hm...**

Linebreka

"Scamander, Lorcan!"

**You remind of somebody.**

_Who?_

**Fred Weasley. The first.**

_Really? Why?_

**Why do you think?**

_I don't know, I barely know him!_

**You NEED to get to know him, then!**

_He must be a great guy for you to think so highly of him. Does he believe in Nargles?_

**I don't think he's heard of them, to be honest.**

_What? Not heard of Nargles? How delusional is he?_

**Quite, considering his head was full of Nargles when I sorted him many years ago.**

_Oh, that is not good. No wonder._

**You'll have to help him get the Nargles out, or have your mum help him.**

_Indeed, I will!_

**That is wonderful, but I am afraid our time has come...**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_I'll try to talk to you again, Mr. Hat!_

Linebreka

**A/N: I've always loved Lorcan and Lysander :) Since I wrote a multi-chapter fic about them ages ago, they've been my favorite NextGen chraracters! And their mum (Luna) is my favorite female character... and tied for favorite overall character (with Draco!). **

**Nargles are as real as ferris wheels.**


	111. Lysander Scamander

**A/N: With all the Total Drama fanfics I've been reading lately, I've finally come across the obvious... they copied Harry Potter in one episode! Well, maybe. :P The 6th episode of TDI, or whichever one it was that Tyler was voted off on, the fear one... everyone had to face their biggest fear! Boggarts! :P Unfortunately, none of them were awesome and said their greatest fear was a Dementor... well, no wonder that's always been my favorite episode... the 4th season hasn't come out yet, right? They are so late, it should've been out in June or July... what, are they trying to copy Pottermore now?**

**Anyone want some good news? Thought so. I've finally planned the totally supermegafoxyawesomehot ending to this story... even though it's quite a few chapters away. I get bored of counting after 20 or so, but it'll make 150 chapters, maybe even 175. I'm not telling you the surprise ending, no matter how much you beg :) Just that before today, I was going to sort Roger Davies' youngest daughter and be done... how boring, right? Every story has to have a supermegafoxyawesomehot ending!**

**Hm. I'm in a rare writing rampage mood. If I still am after posting this, expect that story about George Jr. to be out by the next update :D And if you check my profile by tomorrow rather than waiting for me to announce it, maybe it'll be up by then! If my mood fades, just keep on begging, okay?**

**Bloody helck, this is one long author's note. (The awesome moment when you can share an inside joke with people you don't technically know, just because of ff and the joys of writing and reading...) Seriously, though, it's FOUR PARAGRAPHS long. I've written entire fics that probably aren't this long! O.O Alright, maybe not, now that I'm seeing it in ff font. But I have written shorter chapters than this, for sure.**

* * *

"Scamander, Lysander!"

_Can you just put me in Gryffindor, please?_

**Why do you all assume you'll be in the same house as your siblings?**

_For some people, it's the Nargles. For me, it's because Lorcan and I are twins, best friends, and alike in every way._

**The Nargles very well could be getting to you, because you should have said 'For me, it's because I'm brave and chivalrous.'**

_That's boring. Every Gryffindor wannabe says that._

**Individuality is a Ravenclaw trait.**

_Not solely._

**Arguing with a hat is a Slytherin trait.**

_That's not even a trait!_

**That's as much of a trait as believing in Nargles!**

_No, because probably 85% of the magical community have argued with me, and approximately 0.000000000007% of wizards believe in Nargles._

**More like 99% for the former.**

_80% of statistics are made up on the spot._

**Like that one.**

_Yeah, and the last three._

**Mmhmm.**

_So, if you say Gryffindor loud enough for the whole hall to hear-_

**Bribery doesn't work on me, and I've half a mind to call out Slytherin because of that cunning little trick.**

_Nah. I'm not ambitious._

**True.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Thanks a lot, mon._

**Oh, Merlin help me.**

* * *

**A/N: Oh my goodness, I was so into the writing I didn't change the song on my iPod and I ended up listening to my grandma singing. NOOO! XP (Don't even ask why my grandma, the self-proclaimed worst singer in the world, is on my iPod.) I think she was trying to sing Smoke on the Water. It sounded more like Voldemort laughing. Mixed with NYAHHHH, the Nyan Cat, and Friday.**

**Hm. I think I am in a writing mood. I'll let you know when that fic is up, but first I'll have to plan it out. Then comes the writing part.**


	112. Scorpius Malfoy

**A/N: My new computer is confusing me... On Safari, instead of a homepage, I have all my most visited sites, and I keep clicking on facebook instead of fanfiction by accident! :) Oh, and happy new year, although I just colored a Barbie doll's skin black as my celebration XD Hey, it was funny! And not black as in "I'm racist", black as in literally black... like an oreo or whatever...**

* * *

"Malfoy, Scorpius!"

_**SLY-**_

_Wait! You didn't even say... anything!_

**Oh, my apologies. I should know better than to just assume all Malfoys are Slytherins.**

_I'm not like my father was, and I'm not like my mother at all._

**Ah, you don't like her much?**

_No. She's an annoying bi-_

**Whoa, you are 11!**

_Oh, that's right, I am. Doesn't feel like it. I feel 20 sometimes._

**Do you? That's not good, you should hang on to your childhood! You can never get it back.**

_Yeah, Father's told me that a hundred times. It just hasn't sunk in fully._

**Mmm...**

_Well, I don't want a two-second sorting, but I don't want to have a hatstall either._

**Of course you don't.**

_I'd like to be in Slytherin, but at the same time, I want to be in... Ravenclaw. Gryffindor is overrated, every 'good guy' goes there, and Hufflepuff... well, I'd be killed either by embarrassment or my mother._

**You are no Hufflepuff or Gryffindor, no worries. I feel you are a true Slytherin, but I'm hearing you out anyway.**

_I just don't want people to judge me and think I'm just like my father. That's exactly what they'll do. People are just so... so stupid._

**Yes, they can be... that's why I never complain about being a hat.**

_I'd kind of like to be a hat, or a scarf, perhaps._

**Oh, you do not realize the irony of that, do you?**

_No._

**Look up 'A Very Potter Musical' and 'slash'.**

_Okay... in the library?_

**No, no. The internet- Muggle thing.**

_No Muggle things at home._

**Ah.**

_Yes._

**I feel this is going to be a hatstall if I don't hurry up.**

_Do what's right, then._

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

**Good luck.**

* * *

**A/N: Ug, I feel like a total... uh, forgot the term... right now, because I totally just characterized a character to be like myself... except that he's an exaggerated version of me, I suppose! Either way, I like this chapter. Scorpius is awesome, and one of my headcanons is that Astoria is a rhymes-with-witch who holds Draco back from greatness. She might even be abusive. (Gotta go write down an idea for a fic I'll likely never write!) I used to think she was a Hufflepuff... amazing what fanfiction does to your mind! Well, I feel the overwhelming desire to immerse myself in fanfiction, so adios!**

**Oh, and that George Jr. and Alexis Weasley fic is up. :)**


	113. Alice Longbottom

**A/N: Hello! Just a slightly late warning... from here to the end of the story, there will be just headcanon characters. Like Neville and Hannah's kids, which are this chapter and the 2 after it. So, if that bothers you, you don't have to read this- as long as you're fine with missing the awesome (I hope) ending... which is not headcanon, for the most part. :)**

* * *

"Longbottom, Alice!"

_Don't even think of putting me in Hufflepuff. It is simply despicable, I don't care if my dratted mother was in it._

**Not a fan of Hufflepuff? That's a Longbottom first.**

_Shut up. I don't care. I am not like them._

**Clearly.**

_The Longbottom family has never achieved greatness, no matter that stupid snake my dad killed. Big deal! I will rise above them all and be the greatest Longbottom there ever was! And they're all so... I don't know, joyful and carefree, like Dad doesn't care that his friends and family died. How can someone live like that?_

**I don't know, do I? I haven't done it, but some people say life goes on. You live after the pain because you have to.**

_Whatever, I don't want your stupid philosophy. Just shout out Ravenclaw or Slytherin and get it overwith._

**No Gryffindor either, eh?**

_No freaking way._

**Ah, okay.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

The sorting hat was quite honestly glad to be rid of Alice Longbottom.

* * *

**A/N: Haha. My Alice (who actually goes by Allie...) is kind of... well, emo/gothic/whatever. Not goffic, though, no worries! ;)**


	114. Frank Longbottom Jr

**A/N: Holy crap, the new season of Total Drama is finally out! :) I watched the first episode on Youtube (doubt it's on American TV yet!) and despite my doubt about all-new characters, it's awesome! One character is an obvious clone of Luna Lovegood :) The second time I've noticed a HP reference in the series...**

**I can't believe I'm up at 2 am and not sleeping on my keyboard right now! I've been up much later than this, but not often on Fridays- with school, I don't get much sleep- 7 hours a night at the most, 5 at the least... :/**

**So, there's about a 99% chance I am going to HP world in August :D For doing most of what's there, but definitely NOT the Dragon Challenge, do you reccommend one day or two?**

* * *

"Longbottom, Frank!"

**You are much like your father and your grandfather.**

_Really?_

**Yes.**

_Dad's dad, you mean?_

**Yes, your namesake.**

_Whoa. That's quite a compliment, you sure?_

**I saw into his mind years ago, didn't I? And now I see yours, eerily similar- you'd think you were twins or something.**

_Seriously?_

**Sirius Black is dead, but yes.**

_Oh, that stupid pun._

**It's rather enjoyable.**

_Sure..._

**Do you wish to be in Gryffindor?**

_Why, of course!_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**Just like your father and grandfather- it's only right you're in the same house!**

* * *

**A/N: The one thing I hate about weekends is that they are so short. I mean, sure it's only 2 am on Saturday, but still! I did the math, and with homework added in, we spend more of our lives in school than doing what we want! :/ Where I live with 180-day school years, that's 185 days at home, but with enough weekend homework and stress of exams and whatnot to equal more school... not that I hate school, just that I'd prefer being on fanfiction reading about Tom Riddle to math! :)**

**Oh, and starting I think the 22nd of January (whoa, I feel British saying it that way XD ), I'll be updating every other day instead of every 3 days. :) Then this story will end sometime in 2012. Don't ask me to count the chapters, there's so many and it's a small font... XP**

**Wow, I am tired... I accidentally named this document 'Frank nevilles daughter' XD**


	115. Alastor Longbottom

**A/N: :( I'm trying to update this and I have exactly 10 minutes till bedtime... and fanfiction won't work! :/ So, if I'm not able to get it up in time, just know that I tried...**

**Funny how bad news often comes with good news, isn't it? I find out that my grandma's cat has gingivitis, so he'll have to either have $1500 surgery or be put to sleep, and if the former happens, my grandma likely won't be coming to visit this summer. Then my parents and I get another moving streak, where we want to move! Who knows if it'll actually happen for once, though...? ...Oh, I forgot, most people don't see moving as a good thing XD Well, I do, because in this 500-population small town, nothing ever happens and it's boring!**

**I guess the login part of ff isn't working today... it would have been nice if they'd have let us know yesterday so I could post already :(**

* * *

"Longbottom, Alastor!"

**Goodness, I don't believe a Schlongbottom has had this many kids since... ages ago.**

_Schlongbottom?_

**Don't tell me you're missing out on pop culture.**

_I'm not a Muggle, so if some stupid pop band rhymes with my name-_

**Schlongbottom a pop band?**

_How is it that a magical object knows more about the Muggle world than I do?_

**Good question. It's because I sort Muggle-borns too...**

_Oh. Right. Well, could I be in Hufflepuff?_

**Why do you want to be?**

_I can tell Mum wants to have a kid in her own house, and I'm the last one..._

**Well, that's a very Hufflepuff thing to do, I must say.**

_So am I a Hufflepuff?_

**Hm... I suppose... indeed... but... no...**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_I'll take that as a yes._

* * *

**A/N: Isn't it funny what a writing muse can do to you? I've written some loose planning for a future fanfic, and it's longer than about 10 chapters of this... and did I mention that's just one of the 30-something characters? XP (And it's Mike from Total Drama Revenge of the Island... Multiple Personality Disorder is fun to write about!)**

**So, did you know they make Goldfish (like the fish-shaped cracker thingy) shaped bread? My dad bought some, and it's good! :) They might not have it in other countries besides the USA, though- I wouldn't know! :P**

**Oh, and yes, Alastor Longbottom is named after Mad-Eye Moody :) No idea where I came up with that, but the dead must be honored, right? I like to think Albus Severus named a kid 'Hedwig'...**

**Phew, fanfiction's working again. -_-'**


	116. Kaila Wood

**A/N: Darn it, annoying Canadian Youtubers won't upload the 2nd episode of Total Drama Revenge of the Island... Watch me go listen to the song Canadian Idiot! XD I hate how Americans have to wait so long for the episodes :P It's on there in French, but I don't understand French, so it'd just be pictures with weird words I don't know!**

**On another note, it's finally the weekend... well, Thursday night... close enough XD**

* * *

"Wood, Kaila!"

**Please tell me you aren't as big of a Quidditch maniac as your father.**

_No, I'm not._

**Phew.**

_I'm worse._

**Oh, bloody helck.**

_I won't even ask... I feel Slytherin's Quidditch team is lacking. I need to be there. Those Beaters will have to go, as will that one 6th year Chaser- the Seeker is incredible, and we need two Chasers and a Keeper-_

**Okay, okay, okay!**

_Both of my parents were Quidditch freaks. So am I. I'll be Captain once 5th year Muggle-born Slytherin captain Janie Wyatt graduates._

**Of course you- wait, how do already know your house?**

_Slytherin needs a Quidditch player. I must do my duty._

**Very well...**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Lol, Oliver Wood and Alicia Spinnet's daughter... :) Quidditch obsessed enough?**


	117. Jason Wood

**A/N: Does anyone think it's strange that I'm now starting to ship Draco/Tom Riddle...? Um... yeah... the things staying up till the early hours of the morning reading Aleheather (TD) fanfiction with a song stuck in your head can do... but seriously, they're great for each other! Because... well, they're the HP version of Aleheather! XD (I need to write a Total Drama fanfic once WWWIAD is done. This is one huge obsession that I keep forcing on my dear readers... and my mom...)**

**Just to make myself sound sane, (XD) happy birthday Martin Luther King Jr... even though that was yesterday... your I Have a Dream speech temporarily inspired me to not want to move to Canada! (It lasted 5 minutes.)**

* * *

"Wood, Jason!"

_Oh, I have to be in Gryffindor!_

**Let me guess- since their seeker is gone, you need to do your duty and help?**

_Well, that, and the fact that my parents were in Gryffindor._

**Neither of those are legit reasons.**

_Oh, come on!_

**Still, you are brave- would do anything for Quidditch- and chivalrous.**

_I am a fine gentleman full of chivalry and-_

**Okay, sure. It's the 21st century, nobody is truly 100% chivalrous.**

_Fine. Just shout out the house..._

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: Oh no, I have Nargles in my head... again... XD Don't even ask why... as if I know why they're drawn to me! Oh, maybe it means I'm magical... nah, no Hogwarts letter :P**


	118. Millicent Goyle

**A/N: Crap. My entire HP fanfiction folder has disappeared. Guess I'm writing this chapter over again!**

* * *

"Goyle, Millicent!"

_Father told me I don't want to be in Tacofartbrains._

**What?**

_It's the mudblood house. I want to be in Jigglypuff so I can kill them all! Die! Die! Die!_

**Very corrupted mind you have there. Please seek the Headmistress tomorrow evening.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Haha. Tacofartbrains. XD It's Goyle and Millicent Bulstrode's eldest daughter's version of Pigfarts house, which is on many HP facebook pages...**


	119. Gregory Goyle Jr

**A/N: Kinda odd when I start to think a cartoon is hotter than Tom Felton... O.o (especially when he fell off a volcano, was trampled by 25 people, and was mutilated by lava... whereas Tom Felton is 100% intact...)**

**So, we're nearly at chapter 120! Amazing, isn't it? I wonder if ff has limits with how many chapters you can have in a fic...**

* * *

"Goyle, Gregory Jr.!"

_I'm not stupid like my father is._

**That's interesting, the first Goyle in about... 7 generations... to not be.**

_Must be Mum's blood._

**Probably. Are you saying you should be in Ravenclaw?**

_No, because loyalty and fairness are more important than wit._

**Do you think so?**

_Yes._

**Did your mother cheat on your father and name you after him to compensate?**

_W-what?_

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: It's for you to decide whether or not Millicent Bulstrode Goyle cheated on her husband... XD Oh, I finally remembered what it was I was going to do earlier... check a certain fanfiction archive... :P And stay up past 3 am! :)**


	120. Vincent Goyle

**A/N: I'll be updating this every other day from now on. So, more updates for you guys :)**

* * *

"Goyle, Vincent!"

_Please, don't put me in Slytherin._

**What is Slytherin house?**

_Cunning, ambitious, resourceful- why?_

**Just testing your knowledge and determining whether or not your mother cheated on your father to have you and your brother.**

_My sister is even smarter._

**Yeah, she totally cheated. I'm sure of it.**

_She couldn't have- she and Father make out so often!_

**Do they? Forgiveness, maybe?**

_Ah, no!_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Wait, _what?

* * *

**A/N: In the next chapter, it'll be revealed whether Millicent cheated or not... even though I'm sure it's obvious by now... well, I'm updating early tonight, huh? It's not even 8 pm!**


	121. Amanda Goyle

**A/N: Mwahahaha, and the truth comes out! *cue evil creepy music* :) Isn't it nice to get more frequent updates? I actually like it myself. This is my favorite story to update at the moment because it's quick and easy, yet enjoyable XD My other one is enjoyable, but not so quick, and not hard but not 'do-it-at-6-am' easy...**

**I think I've broken a record today. I had the same song stuck in my head for about 8 hours, and it's a minute and 45 seconds or so long. Think of how many times I could have listened to it in a row if not for school! :)**

**And I'm so happy, because my language arts teacher (who I still don't like) said that we're allowed to read 1 fanfic per 9 weeks and count it as a real book. Awesome! :D**

* * *

"Goyle, Amanda!"

_Would you like to know a mind-blowing secret?_

**Sure.**

_My mom cheated on my 'father' to have Gregory, Vincent and I._

**That wasn't mind-blowing, I'd guessed it already! ...Who was it? How'd you find out?**

_I don't know who, I just heard her and 'Father' talking about it one night, I think he'd just found out. He was really angry. But the next day, he didn't seem to remember what had happened._

**Drunk, most likely.**

_Yeah. I want to be sorted quickly, I'll do some skill-testing questions!_

**Skill-testing questions?**

_Yeah!_

**That... won't be necessary...**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

The entire hall was stunned... a Goyle in Ravenclaw? Surely the hat was losing its touch.

* * *

**A/N: Lol, a non-symbolic name XD I just saw it in a fic somewhere, and it's just canon to me that Goyle had a daughter named Amanda... she wasn't even a main character! But yeah, Millicent sure did cheat, didn't she? Probably with Stephen Hawking- Millicent wasn't exactly smart either, I'm led to believe...**

**In the same language arts class mentioned above, we have to write a short story... so, I borrowed a character (Alejandro) from Total Drama World Tour. Then I decide to make the guy who's a hardened criminal yet good at heart have a name that means 'kind'. I look up 'name meaning kind' and what do I find but... Alejandro! Freaky, huh? Except it actually was 'protector of mankind, variant of Alexander' or something like that. Still... inception XD**

**I just lost the game. And so did you!**


	122. Joshua Smith

**A/N: I guess a lot of people want to know who Millicent cheated with :P Well, the answer is- I don't know! Make it up! Ooh, I know... she cheated with... *cracks up* Harold McGrady- a random Canadian muggle XD (Who doesn't exist!)**

* * *

"Smith, Joshua!"

**Your blood and your personality truly do not mix.**

_So, I'm not a Hufflepuff?_

**Indeed, you are not.**

_I'm the first in my family to not be one... that's so cool._

**Your mother was in Ravenclaw, and few of her ancestors would have been Hufflepuffs.**

_I meant my dad's side._

**Yes, I know.**

_I want to be in Slytherin._

**Why?**

_It's so different. That's what I want, to be different. They'll all notice me, and that's the first step to greatness._

**With that kind of talk, no thinking is required...**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Since Smith is such a common last name, that's Zacharias' kid, fyi :) He totally didn't belong in Hufflepuff, so his son isn't in it! :P And the mom is Padma, I guess. Most of these pairings you'll see are things that I just randomly threw together, I don't really ship them, just don't oppose them :P**

**Anyone notice my new profile picture? XD It's an edited picture that I saved and then edited some more... :P So, there's not much of an original there!**


	123. Ellen WrenChang

**A/N: I'm so happy the torture of math is nearly over! ...Okay, not really, but the algebra is nearly over! Soon we'll be doing geometry, the one type of math I actually like :) (As long as I have a calculator... otherwise, screw it XD )**

**Anyway, can you believe it's been nearly a month in 2012 already? I still keep thinking it's November 2011... I'm quite behind. XD**

**Fyi, the girl being sorted is the daughter of Cho and her Muggle husband.**

* * *

"Wren-Chang, Ellen!"

_It's so amazing being at Hogwarts, and seeing all the magic!_

**It really is. I see it every year and still the Great Hall amazes me!**

_How many times have you seen it?_

**I've seen it more times than the old woman down the street from you has lived in months.**

_Whoa, that's got to be at least a thousand!_

**Probably. I'll admit, I have lost count.**

_Well, it's the 21st century._

**I know that much!**

_That's a relief, I wouldn't want you to be so hopeless. Say, can I be in Ravenclaw? I wish to be just like my mother- she's truly amazing!_

**I'm sure she would be delighted to hear it- remember that come Mother's Day.**

_Oh, I will!_

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Is it just my imagination, or did some of that dialogue sound a tiny bit like the dialogue in the Chronicles of Narnia...? Well, whatever. So... if the winter is really cold where you live (and this doesn't really apply to southern hemisphere people for now :P ) I have a tip. Think of the one person you love the most- whether he/she be real, fictional, or a celebrity (half real!)- and imagine you're cuddling with them! I went outside for 30 minutes in 40 degree F weather with just a t-shirt and it worked for me :) Imagining the fictional (or real) person you love also works when you're pissed off, bored, or tired to change your mood XD Trust me, I've had to use that method for all 3 today alone!**


	124. Cedric WrenChang

**A/N: I'm going to add on to my tip from the other day. If you're about to enter your least favorite class, there is one (possibly more) thing that helps. Having a sea shanty stuck in your head! :)**

* * *

"Wren-Chang, Cedric!"

**I see you've met the misfortune of being named after your mother's lost boyfriend.**

_Yeah, but I like the name._

**That's nice. It means kindly and loved.**

_Now I like it even more... sounds Hufflepuff-ish._

**Do you think you are one?**

_Well... I have other qualities, but I think I'm very fair and kind._

**Do you wish to be in Hufflepuff?**

_Hm... I have to go with yes on that, actually._

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_Thanks! I'll try to live up to my namesake's legacy!_

* * *

**A/N: Funny that I made Cho name her kid Cedric XD Believable, though, I think :) Also, I like to think that Cho's Muggle husband, named Michael Wren-Chang, had a girl he loved who died young much like Cedric. And despite all the girls after her, only Cho ever truly filled the void... alright, author's notes are decidedly not romances XD**


	125. Zackary Dursley

**A/N: For once, I literally have nothing on my mind to randomly put here :O Anyway, I do know that JKR said that Dudley wouldn't have any magical kids, but I'm making them magical anyway :) Just pretend he married a random witch :P**

* * *

"Dursley, Zackary!"

**Dursley? I didn't think it was possible a magical gene could survive contact with your grandfather's DNA!**

_I don't think he likes me anymore... since I'm a... uh, wizard._

**He can't appreciate what he hasn't known for many years. Just turn to your other grandfather if you need one.**

_Thanks for the advice._

**What about your grandmother, Petunia, I believe her name was?**

_She and grandpa have been arguing a lot since they found out... I think she's on my side, though._

**Really? It's about time she learns to accept the magical world- if you remember, tell her I said congrats!**

_...That may not be prudent._

**I guess that's true. Ah, well. Which house would you like to be in?**

_I don't really know anything about any of them, just that my uncle was in Gryffindor._

**Would you like to be in Gryffindor?**

_I don't know. I just want to be wherever I should be..._

**I suppose it comes down to Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. Gryffindor is for those who are brave and chivalrous, while Hufflepuff is for the kind-hearted, loyal, and hardworking.**

_I think Hufflepuff sounds nice. Gryffindor is like being a soldier on the front line, while Hufflepuff is like being a bit more in the back, sort of keeping an eye out for people and staying loyal to your friends and stuff._

**That's a nice analogy. Pretty true, actually, based on the battles I've heard all about.**

_Battles? How dangerous is this place?_

**It's safe now, but I was also talking about World War II- lots of Muggle-borns remembered it during their sortings...**

_Okay._

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: Someone is very knowledgable about the wizarding world XD**

**I'm listening to Fryday... help me get the power to click the skip button on my iPod :P**


	126. Anna Dursley

**A/N: It's so weird using Libreoffice now instead of that crappy WordPad... I like it though :) It's just like Microsoft Office, except that it's free! Just Google it if you want to download it.**

**And the Super Bowl sure is tense! I've been watching it and reading fanfics at the same time... so I don't even notice most of the touchdowns and field goals, but still XD So far, the Patriots are winning, and it's the 4th quarter... yay :D**

* * *

"Dursley, Anna!"

_I wonder if my younger siblings will also be magical?_

**Perhaps, if so far your brother and you both are. It is definitely possible.**

_I have a younger brother and two younger sisters. I am positive one of them is magical, but the other two I'm not sure about._

**Only time will tell, you'll just have to wait until the summers they are eleven.**

_I guess so._

**Caring deeply about your family like you do, I think you could be in Hufflepuff.**

_I don't know about that. That's where Zack is, and I am nothing like him. Mum says we're polar opposites, actually._

**Well, you do have something in common, and that's your familial love.**

_But doesn't everyone love their families?_

**Hm... treasure your innocence, kid.**

_Er... okay?_

**I do suppose Hufflepuff is not the answer for you, however.**

_What about Ravenclaw? I'm smart._

**Yes... you are, but it's not quite right for you.**

_What is, then?_

**Either Gryffindor or Slytherin.**

_I'm really brave, I think._

**Perhaps this will surprise you, then.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_What?_

* * *

**A/N: Four football minutes later and the Patriots are still winning and just got a 2nd down... gosh, I hope they win! :) It's 17-15, so close!**

**I need to post this so I can continue watching the game! (For those of you who aren't American, this is basically one of the biggest days of the year for us... it's the final game of National League Football season! And my favorite team is winning so far!)**


	127. Henry Dursley

**A/N: I really should have knocked on wood after posting that last chapter XD Anyway, we have 1000 reviews! :D It's so exciting... you guys are awesome :D This is more exciting than the first time I got this many reviews, because you guys review because you want to, not because of a vote :) So, virtual cookies for all :D**

* * *

"Dursley, Henry!"

_Not Slytherin, not Slytherin, not Slytherin, not Slytherin..._

**Not Slytherin, huh?**

_No._

**Why not?**

_My sister came home after a few months of being in Slytherin, and now she's evil, I swear!_

**Is she? Anna really didn't seem evil at all when I sorted her...**

_You remember her? But that was two years ago that you sorted her!_

**I remember the exact words of every sorting I've ever given.**

_Even the founders'?_

**I never sorted them, the houses are, after all, named after them.**

_Oh. Right. Well, I'm a Muggle-born, so..._

**Muggle-borns often end up getting better grades than pure-bloods, you know. Your great-aunt and your uncle's sister-in-law are perfect examples. Lily Evans and Hermione Granger, Weasley now.**

_Oh, I met her once. She had bushy hair._

**Yes... but if I recall, it got tamer as she got older.**

_You mean it was once worse?_

**Indeed.**

_I'm scared to see photos._

**You should be... even Gryffindors have fears.**

**_GRYFFINDOR!_**

* * *

**A/N: It's pretty weird typing with a font besides Times New Roman, Arial, or Calibri XD Even though you won't see this on fanfiction, Yummah Strawberriez is an awesome font :)**

**Anyway, Dudley had a lot of kids, huh?**


	128. Greta Dursley

**A/N: This year has been full of fanfiction meeting real life XD First someone mentions ff . net in class, making me realize that someone around here has heard of it, and then my teacher acknowledges that LibreOffice (which makes me think of ff since that's where I heard of it) exists. :)**

**Well, in case any of you don't like the idea of Dudley having kids, especially so many of them, this is the last one!**

* * *

"Dursley, Greta!"

**Your parents must love making babies.**

_They really do. I'm the 5th._

**Ah, I see... your older sister is not magical, is she?**

_Nope. She's terribly jealous of Anna, Zack, Henry and me._

**I bet she is.**

_Honestly, it's ridiculous. If I was the Muggle of the family, I wouldn't be complaining for more than a week. I'd certainly focus on my new chapter of life- junior high._

**Can you really say that out of experience?**

_Well, no, but I know that I am very good at thinking things out and doing what is right._

**Soon you'll realize the absurdity of believing that you'd be content without magic.**

_Someone is quite the master Diviner._

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_Looks like all the Dursley children are in different houses._

* * *

**A/N: Poor unnamed sister... let's hope she doesn't turn out like Petunia! It's very likely, though. After all, she is Tuney's granddaughter...**

**Well, it's almost the weekend- isn't that exciting? :)**


	129. Gwendolyn Goldstein

**A/N: My language arts teacher has unknowingly caused tons of ironies in my life... should I love her or hate her for it? XD And the latest one is kinda funny. I wrote a one-shot just now, because I fell in love with a pairing yesterday and named them my new OTP, then when I finished writing it my thoughts were 'that's a load off', a quote from one of the characters in the fanfic... weird :P**

**You know what's even weirder? The fact that this is actually the only story I have going right now :O (But that doesn't mean you can expect daily updates XD )**

* * *

"Goldstein, Gwendolyn!"

_Why does she have to call my real name? I don't like it._

**Why ever not?**

_It's too long. I like being called Gwen._

**Well, make sure she knows that, then.**

_I will. Anyway, I want to be in Ravenclaw. My dad was in that house, and he says it's awesome._

**You are a daddy's girl, aren't you?**

_Definitely! Isn't it weird how usually girls are more like their fathers and guys are more like their mothers?_

**I suppose so. I never noticed that.**

_Well, you are a hat._

**I have human-level intelligence, as classified by the Ministry of Magic.**

_The Ministry classified you?_

**Yes.**

_I suppose that makes sense. So... can I be in Ravenclaw?_

**Do you truly belong there?**

_That's for you to decide, I thought._

**Technicalities.**

_Well, I think I do. I love learning, and I'm not really brave or loyal, or as ambitious as I am intelligent. I want to be in Ravenclaw._

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_Yes!_

* * *

**A/N: Isn't the song Hotel California just perfect? Now, onto a less random topic... um... who thinks I should write a bunch of romantic one-shots since Valentine's Day is coming up, even though I don't really celebrate it? ...Yeah, I just answered my own question- yes! :D It'll be mostly Total Drama, though. Maybe I'll write a HP one...**

**Oh, by the way, Gwen and the next 2 kids are Anthony Goldstein's, and some random Muggle named Kelly.**


	130. Lynett Goldstein

**A/N: You know what I've decided is the most absurdly complicated computer program I've ever come across? Libreoffice Database... I tried to write random stuff for a fanfic on it, and I couldn't even figure out how to get it to let me type -_-'**

**Anyway, here's the 2nd of the Goldstein kids :)**

* * *

"Goldstein, Lynett!"

**So, your sister is named Gwendolyn and you're named Lynett?**

_My parents like the name Lyn._

**No kidding...**

_But although I go by Lyn sometimes, Gwen never does._

**Right.**

_I'm not too much like her. I mean, she's really, really, smart... I'm kind of smart, but I don't think I'm a Ravenclaw._

**You are not. You could be in either Gryffindor or Hufflepuff... it's your choice.**

_Really, I get to choose?_

**I do take your choice into account, especially when you could go either way.**

_Well, that's a lot to take in! Gryffindors get a lot of pressure, but Hufflepuffs are underestimated... which do I choose?_

**Which do you think is more important, bravery and chivalry or loyalty and fairness?**

_Hm... I know my choice._

**As do I.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: Don't you just love putting songs on repeat? XD I'm surprised this chapter didn't end up being all about Touchin On My by 3OH!3, considering how much I'm listening to it :P**

**Anyway, this not updating a fic every day is confusing me XP I keep forgetting which days I have to update... so... if I update too often or not often enough, I have an excuse :P**

**Happy 130th chapter :D**


	131. Robert Goldstein

**A/N: Well, happy day-after-Valentine's Day :P I don't really celebrate it that much, but I know lots of people do :)**

**And what do you know, their 3rd child is not named 'Lynn' in some way XD**

* * *

"Goldstein, Robert!"

**Are you related to Gwen and Lynnet?**

_Yeah, just because I don't have Lynn in my name doesn't mean I'm not a Goldstein!_

**I guess you have a point. You are a guy, after all. There hasn't been a girl in six generations without 'Lynn' in her name in your father's family, you know.**

_Seriously?_

**Yes. Notice your grandmother's name? Eilynn?**

_Yeah... I always wondered why it was spelled weirdly like that! Why, though?_

**Why? You don't know?**

_No!_

**Your great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother was named Lynn, and she discovered the magical cure to fevers! Of course, they were awful back then, unlike now.**

_Whoa, that's so cool!_

**Isn't it?**

_I want to be a Healer!_

**Most Healers are Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs.**

_My dad was a Ravenclaw, so could I be one? Or a Hufflepuff?_

**I do believe you are one or the other. Is knowledge truly the most important thing to you, or is it helping others?**

_You are kidding, right? Helping others, of course!_

**Very well then.**

_Wait, did I answer correctly?_

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

**That's for you to decide.**

* * *

**A/N: So... I have a random request. If I ever say that I hate a song that is not Justin Bieber or Nicki Minaj, make me listen to it again XD Today alone, I've discovered about 4 songs that I 'hated' yesterday -_-'**

**Anyway, I know I've said this in author's notes countless times, but... it's almost the weekend! Yay! :) This week I've been hating my language arts teacher more than usual XD**


	132. Wendaline Boot

**A/N: Gosh, so much happened today... it's crazy. First I find out that my favorite teacher is leaving... foreverish... on Wednesday :( He's going to be head of blahblahblah at the county office, so it's good for him, but I don't want him to leave! This means I'll probably only see him 2 or 3 more times for the rest of my life- Tuesday, the end of March (we have a big project due, and he said we still have to do it -_-'), and maybe once more... it's so depressing! And then, ironically enough, I went to his favorite restaurant for dinner... I didn't plan it, by the way :P**

**And of course, there's the brighter news- I'm totally excited for Friday! Not for anything anyone here probably cares about, but... still XD I get to watch one of my favorite cartoon characters ever be turned into a radioactive monster! Fun.**

**And these next 2 are Terry Boot and a random Muggle named Matilda's kids.**

* * *

"Boot, Wendaline!"

_Please, I have to be in Ravenclaw._

**Have to be?**

_Yes._

**Ah... I see. Mhm.**

_Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure..._

**You don't need to spew out Ravenclaw quotes to get in the house!**

_Okay, what do I have to do?_

**Prove yourself.**

_The-_

**No, that doesn't mean doing Calculus!**

_Oh. Sorry!_

**You are extremely intelligent, that is for sure.**

_Thank you!_

**However, I see that Hufflepuff is nearly equal to your Ravenclaw instincts.**

_I choose Ravenclaw!_

**Don't make yourself sound like a Pokemon trainer. That went out of style years ago.**

_How do you know about Pokemon?_

**Everyone does!**

_Yeah, but you're a magical hat!_

**I see in Muggle-raised kids' heads, don't I?**

_I suppose... but do they really think about Pokemon?_

**One did, once.**

_Interesting. How many leagues had they bested?_

**Every single one, including the Green version, and both Black and White, which had only just come out at the time.**

_Awesome! But... moving on from Pokemon..._

**You wish to be in Ravenclaw?**

_Of course!_

**Very well.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: I seriously do not know where the Pokemon references came from... maybe it's because I'm really tired right now. *starts singing like a Jigglypuff***


	133. Christopher Boot

**A/N: Considering the to-be-published fic I've just spent an hour or so writing, I sure hope this chapter doesn't turn out too sweet, romantic, or Jersey Shore-like XD**

* * *

"Boot, Christopher!"

_Please, whatever you do, don't put me in Slytherin._

**With ambitions as high as yours, I'm afraid I may not be able to honor that request.**

_You think I have high ambitions?_

**Yes.**

_Oh. Well, I can drop the act now- Slytherin please!_

**Act? Explain yourself...**

_Well, Wendy told me you put people wherever they don't want to go unless you pretend you don't want to be there._

**Really? That sneaky little- perhaps Slytherin wouldn't have been bad for her after all.**

_Haha, perhaps. Now, sort me already!_

**Goodness, you are a demanding child.**

Now!

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

**Impatient brat.**

_I heard that!_

* * *

**A/N: Well, that's not sweet, romantic, or Jersey Shore-like :P It's short, though. And this is one of those rare occasions where I have nothing to say in an author's note XD**


	134. Alysa Corner

**A/N: Sigh... after spending a full 8 minutes trying to get LibreOffice to work, I quit and use WordPad, then what do you know, Libreoffice comes up... about 9 times. -_-' Maybe having 70 tabs open isn't good for your computer's speed. Hm. Who knew? :P Maybe I should close out some of those tabs. They're all just slash fanfics anyway... with the same pairing... I could copy and paste them to my to-read list XD**

**Anyway, I'm sad to see my science teacher go, of course, but the new guy who starts tomorrow seems okay :) And today I found out I'm also getting a new bus driver. I'm just hoping and praying that my language arts teacher will be the next to go :D**

**...Yeah, I should do something about those tabs. My screen is flashing. This looks bad...**

**And next we have Michael Corner's kids.**

* * *

"Corner, Alysa!"

_Hello. I'm Alysa, what's your name?_

**Did you really just ask that? I'm the Sorting Hat!**

_What kind of a name is that? Mine is Alysa, some others are Dave and Gretchen. Really, what is your name?_

**I... don't have one, actually.**

_Well, you need one!_

**I'm not a human.**

_Oh well, that's irrelevant! How about... Sam?_

**Sam the Sorting Hat... I guess it has a nice ring to it.**

_Well, are you a girl or a guy?_

**I am neither.**

_Oh. Well, Sam can go for either!_

**I guess I should tell McGonagall to call me Sam then, shall I?**

_Ooh, please do! I'll tell her if you don't!_

**Oh, alright. You are a very unique person.**

_Thanks, Sam! Isn't that one of Rowena's traits?_

**It is.**

_I'd like to be in Ravenclaw! Don't worry, I'll come and see you after I get sorted!_

**Will you? That's very kind.**

_It's no problem, I sense you are very lonely!_

**Well, I guess it's never been the same since Fawkes left...**

_Who was Fawkes?_

**A phoenix, Dumbledore's.**

_Ooh, I wish I could have met him._

**Yes... you two would have gotten along very well.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_See you around, Sam!_

* * *

**A/N: Well, the sor- er, Sam- has made a friend! XD So, has anyone heard the song Dear Mr. President by P!nk? It's incredible, and really deep :) And my screen is still flashing. It's scaring me XD**


	135. Caren Corner

**A/N: Well, I now have only 2 tabs open and my computer has stopped flashing XD That's a good thing... lol. And my new science teacher is okay, I think. But I'm one of only about 2 people who don't hate him... and the other person is someone I used to really hate :P Weird, huh? And if you wanna know why I used to hate him, it's because he was once really close to beating the Pokemon league, so I agreed to help him out by temporarily trading him my Empoleon and Dialga, both of which were level 80-somethings, and then he never gave them back :( But I still beat the league on that one game and no other... I guess cheats really do help XD (Yes, I had to cheat to beat the easiest Pokemon league there is. I'm that bad at it...)**

* * *

"Corner, Caren!"

_My sister said your name is Sam. Is that true?_

**Yes, it is.**

_Why do you need a name? You're a hat! For eons you've been called 'The Sorting Hat'!_

**Perhaps I happen to like the name Sam.**

_Oh. Really?_

**Mhm.**

_Did my sister put you up to it?_

**She suggested it, but I did not protest. As a matter of fact, the two of us have had many, many conversations in the two years since she was sorted. We have had quite the fun.**

_Oh. Okay. Cool. Sorry._

**You know, you two have some similarities.**

_How could you say that?_

**I only mean both of you thirst for knowledge. Believe me, other than that you two are nothing alike!**

_Okay, well thanks!_

**It's not necessarily a compliment... in fact, quite the opposite... but a Ravenclaw would believe it is.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Does anyone else get the vibe that Sam doesn't like Caren? XD I think he really likes Alysa, and Caren dislikes her... oh, the plots I can come up with on the spot :P Well, by the time some of you read this, it will be (read this in Rebecca Black voice) Fryday! :) Finally.**

**So, did anybody get my random super-vague reference? If so, virtual cookie for being an obsessive fan like me over something that's not HP-related :P**


	136. Sally Zabini

**A/N: I just realized something weird. At the bottom of the typing program I use, it says STD. I wonder what that stands for besides 'Sexually Transmitted Disease' XD**

**And the next kids are Blaise and Pansy's :P**

* * *

"Zabini, Sally!"

_Hmph. So many mudbloods here._

**Do you really believe in that crap?**

_What crap?_

**Just like your mother...**

_Thank you!_

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

**That wasn't a compliment.**

* * *

**A/N: She seems oblivious to me :P Anyway, it's hard to believe, but only about a month and a half until Easter :)**


	137. Darwin Zabini

**A/N: I must thank you once again for your reviews... I was so pissed off a minute ago, if not for them I'd be hiding a body instead of updating this! Okay, maybe that's a _slight _exaggeration... but still. XD**

* * *

"Zabini, Darwin!"

_Please don't put me in Slytherin._

**Why not? All of your family's been there.**

_Yeah. Exactly... it's mainly my sister and mother though. Dad's alright._

**I suppose I can't blame you for not liking your sister and mother. Oh, don't tell them I said that.**

_Don't worry, I won't. I have to respect you for it! They're right old-_

**No need for an eleven year old to be swearing!**

_Okay, fine. You have a point. Why don't you like Sally and Mother?_

**Simple. The word you were about to use.**

_Ah. I see. Let me guess, they just spewed nonsense about 'mudbloods' while they were being sorted._

**Spot on.**

_So, I am the white sheep of the family, I hope. Is it true?_

**I believe so. You have nothing against muggle-borns, and you are not particularly cunning. You are a bit ambitious, but I feel that placing you in Slytherin, because of the prejudice, would simply mess you up.**

_You really would not sort me because of my possible future?_

**I believe you're a bit of a tie of Slytherin and Ravenclaw as is.**

_Really?_

**Yes.**

_Ravenclaw, here I come!_

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_Thank you, thank you, thank you!_

* * *

**A/N: ****


	138. Jessica Macmillian

**A/N: Stupid fanfiction, messing up my last author's note... if I remembered what it was supposed to say, I'd tell you XD And I can't believe I was so p.o.'d two days ago :P Now that my trip to Disney World and HP World has been confirmed, being p.o.'d is completely foreign :D**

**And now we have Ernie Macmillian and (your choice) either a random unknown witch or Katie Bell. I don't really care who the mom is XD**

* * *

"Macmillian, Jessica!"

_Oh no I can't see oh no why are they staring at me oh-_

**Calm down!**

_Ah! You talk!_

**I just sung a song to you, did I not?**

_I- I thought it was an enchantment or something- oh, Dad didn't tell me about this! What if you're a cursed object-_

**I can assure you no cursed object would be in Hogwarts.**

_Did you really just say that?_

**Yes.**

_You've got a lot to learn about 1996-1998..._

**I didn't hear any news during those years. I was stowed away in a dusty cabinet most of the time.**

_Oh... I'm sorry. Are you alright?_

**It's been over a decade now, of course I am! Thank you anyway for your kindness.**

_Does that mean Hufflepuff? Kindness... like my dad? Because that is where I want to go!_

**Is it now? Ah... hm... yes... you would do very well in Gryffindor, however, it is apparent that is not where you belong.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: I don't know about wherever you guys live, but here, unless we get a cold front, no more than another week until it'll be shorts weather- 70's Fahrenheit :) I'm glad it's finally spring- my favorite season! (Except for the pollen, which I'm allergic to, and bees, which I'm terrified of...) Anyway, I guess I'm kinda getting spring fever. Just without the cleaning part XD**


	139. Erin Macmillian

**A/N: I just realized I've been awake for 20 hours straight... and I'm not even tired! XD**

* * *

"Macmillian, Erin!"

_I want to be in Ravenclaw._

**Do you now?**

_Yes. I just said that._

**Well, do you have a reason?**

_That's where all the smart people go, and they always get far in life._

**No, not always.**

_Name one smarticle who didn't get far!_

**Hm... just one? How about Quirinus Quirrell?**

_Uh, who?_

**Helena Ravenclaw?**

_Rowena's daughter?_

**She died at a young age, you know. Ask her for the full story...**

_I will when I enter Ravenclaw tower tonight._

**Honestly, I don't think Ravenclaw is where you belong. You want just to get far in life, you don't truly believe wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure.**

_But isn't it smart to want to get far in life?_

**Yes, but it is called ambition.**

_You don't mean-?_

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: For once, someone doesn't go where they want. Because I'm feeling generous XD**


	140. Carlos Macmillian

**A/N: Sorry about not posting on time, ff wouldn't work- every time I clicked the doc manager, it logged me out :P**

* * *

"Macmillian, Carlos!"

_I can't believe I'm finally at Hogwarts... it's so overwhelming!_

**Everyone feels that way when they first arrive.**

_Even Death Eaters?_

**Okay, most people.**

_Just curious. I think I'm a lot like my dad._

**Do you now?**

_Yeah._

**So, you think you belong in Hufflepuff?**

_Well, I'll work hard to get something done, and I hardly ever make fun of people._

**I can tell you want to be there, and that is true. You certainly are no Slytherin or Gryffindor, and I think you have a greater desire for acceptance than knowledge.**

_...This is deep._

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: Does anyone know what Saturday is? It's a big day in the HP fandom ;D**


	141. Cheryl McLaggen

**A/N: Saturday is the birthday of the one and only awesome lycanthropic marauder... Remus Lupin! :D**

**And the next kid is Cormac McLaggen's... and some random OC named Kayla is the mom :P**

* * *

"McLaggen, Cheryl!"

_I don't know what is up with him, thinking he's better than me... hmph._

**Who are you talking about?**

_Ray Jones._

**Ah, your future husband.**

What?

**Oh, sorry. Just predicting the future...**

_But you're a hat, not a Seer!_

**I foresaw the marriages of Lily and James Potter, Hermione and Ron Weasley, your parents, amongst others.**

_What? Dad told me the exact words of his sorting and it had nothing to do with your petty matchmaking._

**I didn't see he would marry your mum, I hadn't yet sorted her. It was when I sorted her that I knew the two were meant to be.**

_Why?_

**Both have huge egos and-**

_Oi, they do not!_

**Yes, they do. As do you.**

_Oi!_

**And I think it is time for me to right the mistake I made sorting your mother into Hufflepuff, by sorting you correctly.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_Why Slytherin?_

**Simple. You aspire to be everything. It's called ambition.**

* * *

**A/N: And she inherits her parents' egos XD And yeah, I guess her and Ray Jones (random made-up person) will get married if you want them to :P**


	142. Hubert Flint

**A/N: Happy birthday to Moony :) It's 12:05 am, so it's technically March 10th :P And did you know that Ash Ketchum from Pokemon is voiced by a girl? Yeah... I wasn't surprised to find out XD**

**Next we have the offspring of Marcus Flint and a random OC... this story has a lot of them now, huh? Makes me a bit of a hypocrite since I don't like OC's much XD**

* * *

"Flint, Hubert!"

_I can't believe that kid had the nerve to do such a thing..._

**Call your grandfather a Death Eater?**

_Yes!_

**Well... let me finish before you explode. Although it is unwise of this child to say so, he _was_ one.**

_I know that! But the way he said it!_

**Like he thought you'd be one too?**

_Exactly! One day I'll be Minister of Magic, and I'll show him!_

**I am sure you will. Now, calm down and let me sort you.**

_Fine._

**_SLYTHERIN!_**

* * *

**A/N: Just for the record, I do not think Slytherins are evil... even if I sort all the bad people (and Hubert) there. I mean, I am one! And that's why I tried to make him seem alright. Although if any of you read the fanfic I wrote over a year ago about Chocolate Frog Cards, you would know what I really think of Hubert Flint XD (evil)**

**It's weird to have two songs stuck in your head at once... especially when they are by Evanescence and The Beatles. XD  
**


	143. Laura Flint

**A/N: Are you in the mood for a good horror movie? Well then go read about or watch something about an old Pokemon Red hack called Pokemon Black... I feel like an advertiser now XD Anyway, it's so creepy...**

* * *

"Flint, Laura!"

_Just don't put me in Slytherin._

**Any particular reason why?**

_That's where my brother somehow went. Hmph._

**U mad, bro?**

_I am not a bro, and don't you dare troll me! Stupid hat._

**I think I'm rather intelligent, actually.**

_Oh well. I'll do whatever it takes to make my brother see..._

**See... what?**

_That the true path is that of..._

**Voldemort or Dumbledore? Grindelwald, even?**

_Uh... no._

**Who, then?**

_Edward Cullen._

**What? No! Team Jacob!**

_Edward!_

**Jacob!**

_Edward!_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Edward!_

* * *

**A/N: Random twist... lol. I'm Team Jacob, except that I don't actually like Twilight XD**


	144. Aidi Jordan

**A/N: I finally brought myself to count, and there are just 30 chapters left! That's 60 days until the end unless I decide to update more often... which I'm thinking of doing... I'm sure going to miss writing this- it's been over a year since I started! But I really have already run out of canon characters (for the most part) and there can't be limitless OC's. :P**

**Next we have the daughter of... Lee Jordan! And anybody your mind can come up with is the mom... Except for the obvious *coughHitlercough***

* * *

"Jordan, Aidi!"

_'Ello, mate._

**Mate? Really?**

_Wut's wrong with that, eh mate?_

**Do you happen to know a George Weasley?**

_Two of 'em, eh!_

**Did the elder one tell you to talk like an Australian?**

_No way, eh, mate! 'e told me to talk like an Australian-Canadian, eh, mate!_

**Oh, bloody helck...**

_Helck, eh?_

**Double bloody helck!**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

**Begone!**

_Seriously, eh, who _says_ that, mate?_

* * *

**A/N: Haha... Australian-Canadian is a great accent combo, isn't it? XD And I recently beat a gym in Pokemon in less than a minute... does that count as a record or something? Okay, so on a more important note, do you think I should update more often? Like, say, once a day, twice a day? Or less often? Tell me what you think!**


	145. Maekala Nott

**A/N: Okay, I think almost everyone said I should update more often. :P That won't be immediately though, just so you know- my plan is to just prewrite most of the story (over the weekend, of course), then post maybe a chapter a day. So, opinions on that? :P**

**And the next two kids are Theodore Nott's... and I paired him with Daphne Greengrass, but if you want the mother can be anyone from Jane Doe to Annabeth Chase... although she belongs with Percy Jackson, so please don't do that :P**

* * *

"Nott, Maekala!"

_To be sorted, should I just tell you about my life?_

**Most people do that without asking, so... I suppose if you'd like to.**

_Well... okay, this is awkward._

**You think?**

_Yeah... so... how to break up an awkward moment?_

**I just lost the game.**

_Oh, _come on_!_

**I couldn't resist...**

_That's not very nice!_

**I'm just following the rules!**

_I guess you have a point._

**I know I do.**

_Arrogant, much?_

**I'd do well in Slytherin.**

_I thought you'd just be a Gryvenpuffin, actually._

**Well, yeah. That's why I'd do well in any house.**

_Okay... can we just get on to my own sorting?_

**Meh...**

_You are an odd hat!_

**Well, thanks.**

_Would I do well in Slytherin?_

**Yeah. But really, you have aspects of each house.**

_Even Hufflepuff?_

**You don't know it, but you really are very caring.**

_How do you figure that?_

**Did you not take special care to make sure your brother survived that incident?**

_Well, what kind of a sister wouldn't try to save his life after he was attacked by a neighbor's dog?_

**Why did you just give away plot like that?**

_Why did _you_ just break the fourth wall?_

**_You_ just did by telling me that.**

_Fine, fair enough._

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

**Hey, that rhymes!**

* * *

**A/N: The Game and the 4th wall... they go perfect together, don't you think? Every time I think of one, I think of the other. I lose the game more often than I read HP fanfics...**


	146. Patrick Nott

**A/N: I'll admit I almost turned my computer off to play Pokemon LeafGreen instead of updating this... what? I forgot it was already overdue and my Flareon needs to learn a fire-type move. XD**

* * *

"Nott, Patrick!"

_Muggle things still don't work at Hogwarts, right?_

**Of course not, why do you ask?**

_Phew... just making sure no one is video-taping me wearing... you... oh, that sounded _so_ wrong._

**It did, actually. And why would you fear being video-taped?**

_What if someone uses it against me when I become-_

**Minister of Magic? Gee, we're going to have a lot of those.**

_No, I don't want to be Minister of Magic. I actually wanted to be a lawyer._

**For Muggles?**

_Yes._

**Then why in Merlin's name are you at Hogwarts?**

_Um... I guess just because my parents made me go._

**Hm... well, if you don't seek a magical education, talk to them. If that doesn't work, study Muggle law here with textbooks.**

_Okay, I'll do that. Thanks for the advice._

**_SLYTHERIN!_**

**You're welcome.  
**

* * *

**A/N: Hm... (I sound like Sam now) you know how people sometimes say 'No comment'? I find that rather hypocritical... because you have to comment to say it :P And after this, the Nott kids end. Any idea who's next?**

**And if you remember how Maekala (last person) tried to save her brother's life once, she succeeded and he's just been sorted. In case you were wondering if he'd died or not...**

**Also, happy St. Patrick's Day... and his name being Patrick was 100% coincidental. No lie. I made his name up well over a year ago... with no idea I would even be writing this fic, it was 2010. Weird, huh? XD**


	147. Joanne Thomas

**A/N: And of the 4 things I wanted to write this weekend, not one of them got done XD Why am I not surprised? Well, I will start updating every day soon. I don't know when. Either when someone nags me about it enough or tomorrow if I remember it...**

**And next we have the offspring of Dean Thomas... and Parvati. :P I actually came up with this idea that these next three, the Thomas sisters (who are triplets), are all seen by the guys as the hottest girls at Hogwarts, even as 11 year olds.**

* * *

"Thomas, Joanne!"

**You sure are relieved for the reassurance this place isn't co-ed, aren't you?**

_Yes, those guys are all over me! It's so annoying._

**I bet.**

_I shall travel with an all-girl crew in my future. I love water and boats, by the way._

**That's nice... I suppose you'll spend a lot of time by the lake, practicing your... feminist sailor routine?**

_Of course! I don't even care about anything in the future, except for boats. I guess that means I'm no Slytherin._

**No, wanting to spend your whole life at sea isn't quite what I'd call ambitious or cunning.**

_Didn't think so! I don't care about book-learning either, so I'm no Ravenclaw._

**Okay, who is in charge of the sorting here?**

_Me._

**That's righ- oi! I'm Sam the Sorting Hat, not you!**

_Sam?_

**Yes. A girl once gave me a name.**

_That's really awesome!_

**It is.**

_So, can I be in Hufflepuff?_

**Hufflepuff? I'd assumed a... uh... sailor... such as you would wish for Gryffindor.**

_Nah... bunch of landlubbers, they all are._

**Landlubbers? People still use that word today?**

_No, I was just fooling around._

**I knew that.**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: This chapter was inspired by the song "I'm On a Boat"... it's so strange, yet awesome. And it's got more vulgarity than some lemons on this site XD**

**And I seriously just now realized that this girl shares a name with JKR. Haha... coincidence again...?**


	148. Juliette Thomas

**A/N: New record- I typed something into Google, something REAL, and only got 8 results! Usually I get at least 100,000... but I had no luck figuring out what it was. So anyone know what CSPSPESOSQS is? It's something in the Pokemon fandom that has to do with contestshipping (May/Drew) I think...**

**So I didn't need any nagging to update this daily! Yay! :) (Unless someone sent me a PM nagging me, I haven't actually checked yet XP )**

* * *

"Thomas, Juliette!"

**Aye, ye landlubber.**

_Oh, please don't act like my sister._

**Sorry about that. I guess you three triplets really are different.**

_Yep. I'm the last of-_

**I know that, I can count!**

_Good to know._

**So both of your sisters have had crazy obsessions, the sea and-**

_Mine is much less crazy than those two's strange pastimes._

**What is it, then? And stop cutting me-**

_Off?_

**I said-**

_I know, I was just playing. My greatest ambition-_

**I may as well shout Slytherin...**

_Hold on! My greatest ambition is to become-_

**Minister of Magic? A lawyer? A sailor?**

_Nothing boring like that._

**Boring?**

_I wish to become the world's greatest..._

**Quidditch player?**

_Well, that too... but I was talking about my greatest ambition, not my second greatest ambition._

**Carry on then. The suspense is killing me, and although I am a Legilimens and could see for myself, I once decided to be fair and make you tell me.**

_Giving out details, much?_

**Don't break the fourth wall!**

You_ just did. Anyway, my greatest ambition is to become the world's greatest doctor!_

**Doctor?**

_Not just any Muggle doctor or a Healer... I wish to become the greatest Pokemon doctor in all of Johto!_

**You _do _realize Pokemon is not real, right...?**

_Nonsense! And Brock is the man of my dreams. Getting him is my third greatest ambition._

**You have many ambitions.**

_I have a list. Wanna hear it?_

**Sure.**

_Number four is getting Ash Ketchum and Gary Oak together-_

**You have got to be kidding me.**

_No way, they're perfect together!_

**I'd rather read Drapple... or Drarry, for that matter.**

_Ooh, I love Drapple!_

**...Moving on...**

_My 5th greatest ambition is to resurrect Peter Pettigrew so that I can kill him again!_

**Goodness, you do realize he was not all bad, right?**

_Humbug!_

**Who actually uses that word? I'm not even that old!**

_Yeah you are, it's from the 19th century, you're from, what, ten thousand B.C.? And Scrooge uses it._

**I am not nearly that old, Miss Scrooge's reincarnation!**

_Nah, I think I'm the reincarnation of Ramesses the Great._

**The greatest pharaoh of Egypt? Are you that arrogant?**

_Yep!_

**Then perhaps you are in the reincarnation of James Potter instead.**

_Oh my gosh, that would be _so_ awesome!_

**Mm...**

_And number seven is-_

"Mr. Sorting Hat, Miss Thomas, are you two nearly finished?"

_**S-sorry, Minerva.**_

_What just happened?_

**It appears we've been talking for _ten minutes_ now.**

_Whoa, no way! I'll come visit you if I can! See ya!_

**Erm... see you?**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Finally, a name I can't find any coincidence in! I swear, I did not plan those names being so coincidental. My subconscious did it... and I named my subconscious Fred, so, blame Fred Weasley XD**

**And I say she's the last of the triplets because they're in alphabetical order in canon, so the one I'm doing tomorrow would technically have been sorted first because her name starts with an E, rather than a J.**

**Isn't she just a perfect representation of us fanfiction writers? Wanting to be in a fandom that doesn't exist and getting the perfect slash/yaoi couple together. *sigh***

**And I think this is the longest chapter I've ever written for this fic. :)  
**


	149. Elizabeth Thomas

**A/N: I'm still sticking to this new update schedule! :) So at this rate, the entire story will be finished a month from now, I think... oh my gosh, I can't believe it! After working on this for, oh, 13 months now, I've sorta come to believe it'll never end, haven't you?**

**And remember, this chapter takes place before the last two, because of alphabetical order. (I probably should've posted them in that order, huh?)**

* * *

"Thomas, Elizabeth!"

**The oldest, by fourteen seconds, of triplets, huh?**

_Yeah. All it means is that we're all good at something. For me, it's baseball, my sisters are good at sailing and... fangirling._

**Sailing? Fangirling? It seems to me like you're the only normal one.**

_Normal? Me?_

**Oh, bloody helck.**

_I won't even ask._

**Yeah, it's an inside joke, I guess.**

_Cool, even hats have inside jokes? I bet mine all have some! Like, I'm sure my Red Sox and White Sox hats have an inside joke about how much the Yankees hat sucks!_

**...I take back my statement about you being normal. How can you own a Red Sox hat and a Yankees hat at the same time? They're huge rivals!**

_So?_

**Also, you do know you're British, right?**

_Of course, but American baseball is so much cooler than football and cricket!_

**I suppose I can't argue with that... though being a hat, I prefer golf.**

_Ooh, you can golf?_

**Obviously not, I don't have arms! I just like to hear kids talk about it during their sortings.**

_Has anyone?_

**Well, it might have been 5 decades ago.**

_And you remember it?_

**I remember the exact words of each and every sorting.**

_Awesome!_

**Trust me, if you were a sorting hat, you would too.**

_How could I be a sorting hat?_

**I'm sure there's a way for humans to become animate inanimate objects.**

_How do I sign up for that? I'd make a great baseball cap!_

**You should ask Dumbledore's portrait about it. But I don't recommend doing that until you're nearly dead of old age; otherwise you'll throw your life away.**

_Hm, good advice._

**Which team would you be?**

_Obviously the Yankees, then I could make people invisible!_

**What?**

_Annabeth Chase's invisibility cap?_

**I'm not familiar with the Percy Jackson books.**

_Oh. You should be._

**Give me the audio books, and I'll listen to them.**

_Okay, I'll have them next term!_

**I wasn't serious, but... alright...**

_Which houses will my sisters be in?_

**How should I know, I'm not a Seer!**

_Well, one loves water and the other's a fangirl._

**I'd say perhaps Slytherin for the water one, or Gryffindor, and for the fangirl, I have a feeling I'll have trouble.**

_Okay! I'll let you get to Joanne now then!_

**You don't call out the house, so you can't say that.**

_Hmph. Fine. I'd do anything for some treacle tart, though, so can we hurry up?_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_How did that get me in Gryffindor?_

**Simple, talk to the Potters!**

_Huh?_

* * *

**A/N: No, she wasn't sorted merely because of a food preference XD That would be hilarious, though. Obviously, Sam has his reasons, which he doesn't often tell us. (And now I'm making it sound like he's real.) So, does anyone like my new profile picture? In my opinion, it's a face all humans should be able to make. ;)**


	150. Laurel Creevey

**A/N: You know, I just now realized how similar Nickelback and Skillet are... both of their singers have raspy voices :P And if they're the same person, you can call me clueless XD**

**And now we have the never-ending offspring of Dennis Creevey. He and Demelza were very hormone-ridden in their twenties, and let's just say they'd never heard of protection ;) (That was just a creative way to say that for a little over a week I'll be doing the Creevey children.)**

* * *

"Creevey, Laurel!"

**Are you sure you aren't a Weasley?**

_Um... yeah, why do you ask?_

**If everyone in your family has a kid, you Creeveys will outnumber the Weasleys!**

_Yeah. I guess. I don't really know about anyone there but Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Harry. Dad loves them._

**Does he still?**

_Yes. He obsesses over them more than my Muggle friend obsesses over Linkin Park._

**...I take it that's a major statement?**

_It sure is! Don't you know anything about the outside world?_

**Oi, I know a lot for a hat!**

_Oh... I forgot you're a hat._

**A lot like your father, you are. Do you believe in the milk god?**

_Duh, doesn't everyone?_

**Oh, bloody helck.**

_I won't even ask._

**How do you worship a milk god?**

_The milk god, Moo's, essence lives inside of the milk we drink. By drinking milk, we take in holy spirits which protect and guide us. When a baby is born, you must douse it in milk as it leaves the hospital in order to grant a good life. If you don't, the fallen angel, Orange Juice, will misguide it to live a life of sin._

**You have got to be kidding me.**

_Haha, I don't actually believe that crap. Mom, Dad, and some of my siblings do, though._

**I just don't understand where they got that idea from.**

_My Uncle Colin wrote a holy book for Milkism before he died. It was called 'The Holy Milk Book'._

**I honestly pity you.**

_Thanks..._

**It must take a lot of bravery to live with a bunch of...**

_Milkies, they call themselves._

**Ah, I see.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I seriously just created a religion... wow XD If two of you believe it, we can call it official! (Two because I don't... seriously, why would I?) Milkism sure is amusing!**

**And we have now finished the first of 8 Creevey kids. Yep, that's right. Eight... one guy had even more! You can guess who, if you want.  
**


	151. Harry Creevey

**A/N: I'm feeling very accomplished right now... I've just gotten past Victory Road on Pokemon LeafGreen, in just 30 hours of playing. I have over 100 hours on Pearl and I still haven't beaten the Elite Four! Clearly, I've improved since 2007. XD**

**And no, I wasn't kidding when I said there were 8 Creevey kids, nor was I kidding when I said one guy had more! Nobody's guessed him so far.**

* * *

"Creevey, Harry!"

**Oh, Merlin help your father.**

_Why? What did he do wrong?_

**He's so obsessed with Harry Potter, he named you after him!**

_Harry Potter was- er, is- a great, brave man and being named after him is a great honor!_

**Is it? Then tell me why you prefer to go by your middle name, James.**

_First of all, it's Jimmy, not James, and second of all, how did you know?_

**I'm a magical talking hat, and you doubt my mind-reading abilities?**

_Yes._

**That's nice.**

_Hey, He forbids sarcasm!_

**He?**

_Moo, duh!_

**Bloody helck, you believe in the milk god?**

_Duh!_

**Well... I guess you may as well join the ranks of St. Mungo's.**

_What do you mean?_

**I mean, you are insane! No offense.**

_What other god is there to believe in?_

**Are you telling me you don't know about Christianity, Islam, Judaism, all those major world religions that have more than seven followers?**

_Christianity, Islam? What are those, diseases?_

**Maybe you should have been named 'Ron'.**

_Huh?_

**Nah, your desire for intelligence, despite your lack of it-**

_Hey!_

**-far outreaches Ron Weasley's.**

_That's not following the Seven Udders of Milkism!_

**...what?**

_I said, that's not-_

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_**Get me off of this head!**_

* * *

**A/N: The Seven Udders of Milkism... a parody of the Ten Commandments and the Five Pillars of Islam. It sure is fun to make up this religion! XD**


	152. Colin Creevey Jr

**A/N: I hope it's true that everything happens in sets of threes, because if it is true, that means I had my last near-death experience (unless you count my death... which I don't...) today. Kind of. :P Basically, if my family and I had been a minute earlier driving down a road, we would have been flipped over in a ditch instead of those other two people.**

**And onto a lighter topic, I was about to post this chapter just now, then I realized I hadn't written it yet XD**

**Also, I am still serious about the 8 Creevey kids and the mystery guy with more! I'm probably going to make a running gag out of saying I'm serious about it...**

* * *

"Creevey, Colin!"

**That was very sweet of your father, to name you after his brother.**

_It was actually Mum's idea._

**Well... she must have cared for him a lot, then.**

_They were in a very physical relationship until he died and my mum got with my dad to make up for her loss. Pathetic, really._

**It sounds to me like you know too much about this. You weren't even born!**

_My grandfather told me everything._

**The milkman?**

_Nah, he retired from that absurdly pathetic position._

**Tell me, do you believe in Moo, the milk god?**

_No, I'm not a Milkist or whatever they call themselves. I'm a Sat-_

**Whoa, what?**

_You didn't even let me finish! I was kidding anyway, I do not worship the devil._

**That's a relief.**

_I'm eleven, you honestly believed that? Ha, pathetic._

**I didn't have enough time to think about it, and you do seem wise beyond your years. Foolish at the same time, calling your vast elder 'pathetic'. McGonagall will not appreciate it.**

_That's a pathetic excuse, but I'll accept it anyway. I'm not that stupid. Honestly..._

**Why do you use the word 'pathetic' so much?**

_I talk about the world. The world is pathetic. Simple._

**'The world is pathetic'? Kid, you're eleven! Don't go all emo on me!**

_I am not emo, those pathetic people-_

**I sincerely hope my beliefs are false.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_Oi, you cut me off, you pathetic hat!_

* * *

**A/N: His beliefs are that Colin will become a dark lord... he won't, though. He's just going to become both a random magical job and a hardcore anime addict... though he clearly shows no signs of the last one. XD Unless you got my probably really obscure references. (I include them in almost every chapter, don't I?) I'll give you a hint, it's called overusing the word 'pathetic'.**


	153. Ginevra Creevey

**A/N: Okay, it looks like there were some technical difficulties with the last chapter. I tried to fix it, but if you still can't see it just let me know and I'll send it to you in a PM unless it's fixed before tomorrow evening (when I update this).**

**Also, I'm thinking of changing my username... again... so if you see this being updated by someone called 'the biggest palletshipping fan' ,'palletshipping is life', 'Gary Oak's cheerleader' or something like that, just know that it's me. :)**

**I guess I can give you all a hint for the guy with 9 kids. Hm... he was a Death Eater! Is that a good hint? XD**

**And I still am serious about Dennis having 8 kids.**

* * *

"Creevey, Ginevra!"

**Whoa, your dad is such a fanboy he named a kid after Harry Potter's wife?**

_Fanboy? Don't you mean fanman?_

**Nah, that just sounds weird.**

_True._

**Since you are a Creevey, I must ask: Do you believe in the milk god?**

_I'm not half as crazy as Dad about religion, but yeah, I do._

**Well, at least you aren't as crazy...**

_When I say I'm not half as crazy as Dad, I mean I'm twice as crazy as him._

**Oh no.**

_Moo says you should never-  
_

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_Running from your troubles? As my brother would say, pathetic! Oh no, great and almighty Moo, I am-_

_**Get me off of this lunatic!**_**Darn Creeveys, I've never said that when sorting anyone else.**_  
_

* * *

**A/N: I've completed about 5% of a big project that's due Thursday... haha. I'm a bit of a procrastinator. So don't be surprised if my next few author's notes are just me rambling about how much I hate my science teacher (the one that got a better job and stopped being our teacher, but still made us do the project), even though I don't hate him, just the project. Just giving you a fair warning. XD (And now that I've said this, just watch me not even do it...)**


	154. Dennis Creevey Jr

**A/N: Yes, I changed my username. Seriously, it was about time XD And in case you are wondering, Palletshipping is a Pokemon ship, Ash/Gary. (I swear, it's canon!)**

**And with the initials SS given out, I will say this- obviously, it is not Snape. He's kinda dead. XD Besides, who would he have kids with besides Lily or Narcissa? (And they're both fanon anyway!)**

**Dennis still has 8 kids. And we have finished half of them! Now for the fifth...**

* * *

"Creevey, Dennis!"

**He's named his kids after his idols, brother, and now himself?**

_Er..._ if you're talking about my dad, yeah.

**What are the others' names?**

_Alara, Hermy, and Ronny._

**Hermy, Ronny... oh, Merlin.**

_Short for Hermione and Ron._

**I figured that out, thank you very much.**

_And Gilly- or Ginevra as you would know her as- told me you would ask me about my religion._

**Ah, yes, do you-**

_No, I don't believe in all that milk crap. I think Dad is kidding about it._

**No, he is not. Colin- your uncle- was such a strong believer in it, and his death impacted Dennis- your father- so much he fell in love with Milkism.**

_How do you know that?_

**I'm Sam the Sorting Hat.**

_Okay... ooh, that reminds me!_

**What could that remind you of?**

_Which houses will have openings for Beaters next year? I want to play Quidditch!_

**That was very random.**

_Just answer me!_

**Hm... I believe Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff.**

_I have to-_

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

_Oi, you cut me off!_

**Sorry, but I knew exactly what you were going to say. Kids these days... so predictable.**

* * *

**A/N: Someone in my language arts class did a book talk on Deathly Hallows today, and she included an epigraph... you want to know what it was? The last verse of Harry Potter in 99 Seconds by Paint. XD It was so epic.**

**Anyway, this kid very well might be a Wood rather than a Creevey. :P**


	155. Alara Creevey

**A/N: I just listened to the song 'Teardrops on my Guitar' for the first time (I'm late, huh?) and I seriously never thought Taylor Swift would swear, even if it's a very minor one. XD I guess she is 20 or so, but I'd just figured she wouldn't because of a great portion of her fanbase being 10-year-old girls... oh well, I still love the song now :)**

**And here comes the next Creevey kid... there's still 8 of them!**

* * *

"Creevey, Alara!"

_Before you ask, no, I don't believe in that milk stuff._

**I guess I was wrong in my assumption that there was a pattern, then.**

_Huh?_

**So far, every other kid has been a believer of Milkism.**

_I guess that's true. Well, the next two are Milkists. Hermy and Ronny... they are much too gullible for their own good. I, on the other hand, believe nothing until I see solid evidence._

**That's very Muggle-like speak you have there. So you don't believe in magic?**

_Of course I do! I mean things like ghosts and vampires and gods!_

**So you must believe in the first two, but not the last one.**

_You've got that right. I also am a firm believer in democracy._

**And you're eleven years old. Goodness, you kids are maturing. I remember the days when eleven-year-olds would have just learned to read...**

_Times change, get used to it._

**I have gotten used to it; I simply can't help but to marvel about the time.**

_Then you haven't gotten over it._

**Are you a therapist?**

_Do you need a therapist?_

**Of course not!**

_Well then, in that case I am not one. But I did read a Wikipedia article on therapy, so I think I could pull it off._

**You won't believe in things without evidence, yet you believe in Wikipedia? I've heard it's faultier than a stereotypical Slytherin...**

_I'm a bit of a hypocrite._

**Clearly.**

_But other than Wikipedia articles, I don't believe anything without evidence._

**Okay, if you say so...**

_Seriously! ...Can you just sort me already?_

**You just had to ask!**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: I don't trust Wikipedia, personally. :) I do trust Harry Potter Wiki, Total Drama Wiki, Camp Half-Blood Wiki, and Bulbapedia, but that's it for Wiki-related websites that I'll believe... and I think Alara would make a great judge. She could replace Judge Judy! XD**


	156. Hermione Creevey

**A/N: I found a Youtube video with a Justin Bieber song that has no dislikes... can you believe it? It must be a pretty good video! Maybe I should watch it. ... Yeah, it's a really great video and the song actually fits it very well. But this is the only JB video that will EVER go into my favorites list XD Not counting the ones I already have titled things like '100 Ways to Kill Justin Bieber', which are hilarious even though I only hate his music, not him.**

**And Dennis Creevey still has 8 kids.**

* * *

"Creevey, Hermione!"

Rose and Hugo made surprised faces in the crowd as their mother's first name was called out.

**Oh my goodness, using Legilimency on your mind for a split second was dangerous.**

_Oi! That's rude!_

**I didn't mean it in a bad way. Just that your Divination abilities overwhelmed my mind.**

_Divination abilities? You're kidding, right?_

**No.**

_Of course you are! Divination is just a bunch of foolish nonsense!_

**Your parents must have possessed a bit of the sight themselves, naming you after your mental doppelganger...**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: What if Hermione Granger was a Seer? That would be so funny! :) She'd never believe it, of course. And for once, Milkism wasn't mentioned... it's reminding me of the Game I just lost.**


	157. Ronald Creevey

**A/N: Since a couple people asked, the JB song/video was Baby, and it was Contestshipping (from Pokemon, May/Drew). And now it's stuck in my head. -_-'**

**Oh no, it's the last Creevey already! Man, the time sure has gone fast... after this just 15 chapters. Can you believe it?**

* * *

"Creevey, Ronald!"

**You Creeveys... you breed like gnomes.**

_Oh, because I haven't heard that one before. Honestly, though, I'm the last one._

**Really? Your family ends?**

_Well, until Laurel's kids come._

**Your eldest sister just graduated last June, didn't she?**

_Yeah._

**Then I sure hope you mean future kids.**

_Of course I do, she's only 18! Anyway, we aren't as bad as the Weasleys in terms of size._

**That is true. So far.**

_I only plan to have sixteen kids._

**Sixteen? It's not April Fools, you know!**

_I know that! I really do want sixteen kids, though. Laurel wants nine, Hermy wants twenty-five, and I don't know about the rest._

**Bloody helck... I sure hope you squared the numbers!**

_Fine, I'll admit that I did square them. Just showing off my math skills!_

**Squaring is not hard.**

_I know that! I also know advanced Calculus._

**Why in Merlin's name are you named after Ron Weasley?**

_My middle name isn't Bilius, it's Neville!_

**Oh, dear...**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

**A Ron in Ravenclaw... wow...**

_It's Ronny!_

* * *

**A/N: Just 45 days left in the school year for me. Yay! :D And 2 months until my birthday :) And of course, Fred and George Weasley's birthday is Sunday. Remember that! Okay, fine, I'll stop being a calendar and post this already. XD**


	158. Natalie FinchFletchley

**A/N: There's finally no more Creeveys... wow. It's weird, isn't it? XD**

**So the sorting hat's break is the daughter of... Justin Finch-Fletchley!**

* * *

"Finch-Fletchley, Natalie!"

_Gosh, I'm starving..._

**Great way to begin a defining moment in your life.**

_It's not like anyone can hear us. And really, I am._

**You've still got over half a year's sorting to sit through.**

_Yeah... can you speed that up please?_

**I can't promise that.**

_Come on, please? I haven't eaten since breakfast!_

**That's rough.**

_Yes, it is! I need to keep my strength up for my exercises!_

**Since when did people call studying an exercise?**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: If you live in the US, you've probably heard about the $600 million (or whatever it was) lottery... unfortunately, I didn't win. XD Not that I expected to, but I wanted to!**

**Three more chapters until everyone finds out who had 9 kids. Two people have already guessed correctly!**


	159. Stella Finnigan

**A/N: I'm going to abandon this story and my entire fanfiction account after this last chapter. I am done with this website, to put it simply.**

* * *

"Finnigan, Stella!"

_He's so dreamy..._

**Oh no, a clone of Lavender Brown...**

_She is my mother, you know._

**Yes. Who is going to be subjected to your torture, anyway?**

_That's not a good way to word it. And the dreamy guy is Scorpius Malfoy... evil and sexy!_

**You don't know him well enough to determine whether or not he is evil!**

_But he's a Malfoy, of course he's evil! And it's totally hot..._

**Urg...**

_What?_

**You're really brave to be willing to put a restraining order aside in the future...**

**_GRYFFINDOR!_**

_Did you just call me a stalker?_

* * *

**A/N: ...April Fool's! XD I'm staying on the site, of course. Even if I was leaving, I'd finish this story. As I'm sure you know, this was Seamus' daughter. And the mum is Lavender I guess... poor kid. :P**

**Since it's April Fool's Day, you know what that means! ...Fred and George's birthday! :) Although if he were real, George would probably just get really depressed on this day. *sobs***

**And I just now realized that Seamus' surname is the same as my language arts teacher's son's name. No wonder it always gave me deja vu to hear either one of them!**


	160. Russell Finnigan

**A/N: Warning: if you are trying to save money, use all your self-control to NOT go on eBay! XD I haven't bought anything yet, but if all goes well I'll be getting a limited edition DSi and a game for $30-something, which is less than the game alone, never mind the DSi!**

**Anyway, unless I counted wrong, this story will be ending April 14th... which is not this Saturday, but the one afterward. :O**

**And it feels like everyone has guessed who had 9 kids. So I guess I'll just tell you. It's Stan Shunpike, and you guys are good guessers! But you still don't know who my special ending chapter sortee is! :D Here's a hint- it's a she.**

* * *

"Finnigan, Russell!"

**Your sister took after your mother, so you probably took after your father.**

_I guess so... why do you care?_

**When you don't have a life, you get very nosy. Trust me. So, if you take after your father, how many things have you burned down in the past week?**

_Only twelve!_

**Bloody helck, you're worse than your father!**

_Oi! I may not be fire-safe at all, but when I set the house on fire last year-_

**I won't even ask...**

_-he did nothing but scream and run away! I put the fire out with accidental magic! All he did was pay for the damage... well, not all of it, half of the house is still damaged._

**Oh, Merlin. I take back what I said, how did that happen?**

_I was trying to use accidental magic to summon some ancient scroll, and it kinda backfired._

**Why would you try something like that? Dumbledore couldn't even attempt that kind of magic!**

_I mean Accio, not some fancy thing you'd find as the plot of a 20th-century fantasy novel!_

**Ah, my bad. Still, a very foolish thing to attempt.**

_Alright, mum._

**I am not your mother!**

_Good. Have you ever heard of the Sorting Hat's Love?_

**Don't remind me of that... why?**

**_RAVENCLAW!_**

**Get away from me, and don't ever mention that again!**

* * *

**A/N: I wonder where Sam heard of that horrible fic? If you haven't read it, don't go searching for it. It's more disgusting than My Immortal... horribly written sex scenes involving 'thingies' are much better than The Sorting Hat's Love. XD**

**I love April Fool's Day... it was so fun convincing my best friend that I was moving to Texas! And I can't believe my mom believed that I was secretly a porn-site addict. XD None of my other jokes were even believed, though. :P Still, for me, this is two more than I usually get a year...**


	161. Chase MacDougal

**A/N: This is the last chapter before we start the Shunpike clan! :P Then after those 9 kids, there's 3 more, and then the last chapter which is still a surprise... and will stay that way! :) So anyway, this child belongs to Morag MacDougal... he was canon, right? I just think of him as that way because I once read a fic with him in it... I don't remember what it was called, though. And if you don't like questionably canon characters, just be glad he's not the one with 9 kids.**

* * *

"MacDougal, Chase!"

_I totally have to be in Gryffindor, I have to- ooh, I just realized the ceiling is reflecting the outside sky!_

**You can't even see the ceiling!**

_Yeah, well, I'm slow! With my mind that is, I'm actually very fast on the Quidditch field and-_

**You do not have a slow mind! Bloody helck, I'm trying to keep up!**

_Well, you're an old dude, of course you're slow!_

**I take offense to that.**

_Sorry and whatever, now, is it true that Snape never washed his hair once in his life?_

**No, it is not! He washed his hair very often in his youth, he was known throughout Slytherin house for having, and I quote a once young Slytherin girl on this, 'luscious, soft, silky hair that anyone would kill for'.**

_Whoa, really? What changed?_

**Lily Evans stopped being his friend.**

_Oh... that's sad. I don't like sad stuff. Let's talk about something happy! Like my girlfriend!_

**You have a girlfriend? You're eleven!**

_So?_

**Kids nowadays...**

_See, you ARE an old person!_

**I'm not a person!**

_Fine, but you are an old dude!_

_**Sigh...**_

**_GRYFFINDOR!_**

_Yay yay yay! I'm so happy!_

* * *

**A/N: If you couldn't tell, this kid has some severe ADHD. XD He could be a demigod if he had Dyslexia!**


	162. Jocelyn Shunpike

**A/N: It turns out MacDougal is a girl... oops. XD I feel like Lightning from Total Drama now... in case you don't watch the show (hardly anyone does, it seems), he tends to confuse people's genders. (But I'm still hoping for him to win this week, next week, or whenever the finale airs!)**

**Anyway, we will now begin the Shunpike family... bigger than the Weasleys and the Creeveys. By the time it ends, Easter will already be over... and even though it's a Thursday, I won't be at school since I finally have spring break next week. :)**

**Just to give you an idea of their ages, the first kid is Teddy's age, and all the rest are a year younger than the ones before them. So the youngest is a year below Albus and Scorpius, I think.**

* * *

"Shunpike, Jocelyn!"

_I am so glad to be away from my siblings!_

**Are you?**

_Yes! I love them, but really, Mum and Dad should have learned about protection earlier..._

**Yeah... nine kids is a bit much.**

_A bit?_

**Okay, more than a bit.**

_You wouldn't hesitate to say that if you lived with them._

**I'm sure.**

_Still, I love them. More than you could ever imagine..._

**I need not imagine, I am a Legilimens.**

_Oh... you are? That makes sense._

**Yes...**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: *3 hours after the above author's note was typed* Sorry if this is a bit scattered. XD I got a sudden desire to search the internet for theories about World War 3, alternate universes, and comas. Don't even ask why. XD But anyway, Jocelyn sure has to put up with a lot, being the oldest of 9... I kinda pity her. :P**


	163. Xena Shunpike

**A/N: It's kind of odd how well Youtube knows me... I know they give you suggestions based on the current video you're watching and the last one you watched, but now they've started giving me videos related to things I've never watched on Youtube but love anyway... namely, Drarry. And I wasn't even watching anything remotely HP-related.**

**Now, the Shunpikes continue. :)**

* * *

"Shunpike, Xena!"

_It's so weird being here without having ridden the Hogwarts Express..._

**Why didn't you ride it? Did a house-elf close the barrier?**

_Er... what?_

**Just ignore the last question.**

_...Okay... I didn't ride it because my father drove me on the Knight Bus. He's the driver now, you know. He actually gets a lot of money from it._

**Really? I never would have guessed... no offense, but I never saw him as likely to succeed.**

_Often the worst of us become the best._

**I wouldn't say often, but that's a nice philosophical quote anyway. You would get along with Dumbledore.**

_Oh, doesn't he have an obsession with Muggle candy?_

**Not just Muggle candy; all candy.**

_We would totally get along then! Candy is awesome!_

**I feel I should intervene here...**

_You aren't my father!_

**I know. Just... uh... this is awkward... no more than two pieces a day?**

_That's not nearly enough! I have six pieces an hour!_

**Oh, bloody helck.**

_In fact, I have some Licorice Wands and Chocolate Frogs in my pocket. Want some?_

**I'm a hat!**

_Oh. Right. Well, I'm having a Chocolate Frog!_

**You're in front of the entire school experiencing a life-changing event and you need candy?**

_There's always time for candy!_

**Oh, Merlin...**

_Mmm... this is so good..._

**Don't rub it in.**

_That really stinks, not being able to have chocolate._

**I suppose.**

_Wow! Guess who I got on the card?_

**'Sam the Sorting Hat'?**

_How did you know?_

**I'm a Legilimens.**

_Oh, the card does say that. Well, congrats on getting on a Chocolate Frog card! It says 'Sam the Sorting Hat is the sorting hat at Hogwarts. He sorts students into their houses, and is never wrong with his calculations.'_

**I've made one mistake in my sortings... other than that, that is true.**

_Who was the mistake?_

**Peter Pettigrew.**

_No idea who that is._

**I suppose, not being a child of one of those main war heroes, you wouldn't.**

_What's that supposed to mean?_

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_I don't think that answers my question._

* * *

**A/N: Dumbledore's reincarnation! XD Sort of. And if you get the Chocolate Frog card reference, and most likely nobody will, kudos to you. :) It's from the first multi-chapter fanfic I ever wrote that wasn't a piece of crap... (so in other words, it was the 3rd or 4th.)**


	164. Stanley Shunpike Jr

**A/N: If you're wondering why I didn't update yesterday, it's because I'm still awake at midnight, so I don't consider the day over. And I'm still awake because I'm skipping school today (Friday) :) The weird part is that my parents are allowing it. XD Even though the only reason I'm skipping is because we wouldn't be doing anything at school if I went.**

**Anyway, being awake at this time after waking up at 6 am is not a good idea, just so you know. I'm about to fall asleep on the keyboard... Well, I have an excuse- my bus was an hour late arriving at the school today, so I needed to make up the hour spent hanging around the school doing nothing. XD**

* * *

"Shunpike, Stanley Jr.!"

_My name sounds too formal._

**You just now realized that, Stanley Jr.?**

_Don't call me that!_

**Fine, fine. Sir Shunpike, your majesty?**

_No way! I'm not a prince!_

**Really? I didn't know.**

_Um... no comment?_

**Thanks for trying to be polite, but I was obviously being sarcastic.**

_I would say thanks for trying to be polite, except you weren't._

**That's a pretty lame comeback.**

_Is not!_

**I'm not going there.**

_Hmph. Fine._

**You remind me a lot of somebody.**

_Who?_

**Somebody.**

_Who?_

**I forgot their name.**

_Oh, come on! I thought you never forgot!_

**Alright, you caught me lying. I just don't think I should tell you who.**

_Tell me!_

**No.**

_Is it... um... Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way?_

**No!**

_Good. What about Jasmine Ca'nary Alice-_

**Nope.**

_Okay. B'loody Da'ark-_

**None of those 'goffs'!**

_Oh. I'm out of ideas then._

**The only people you can think of are fictional 'goffs'?**

_Yeah. No, wait... is it Kevin Garnet?_

**...Bloody helck.**

_What?_

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Wait, tell me who-_

* * *

**A/N: Don't ask who he reminds Sam of. I don't know. XD You can choose... if you want, it can be Turtle from 'imma wiserd', someone normal, or even Sam himself. (Probably not the last one though.)**


	165. Marian Shunpike

**A/N: I'm thinking I should start updating this during the day, so that I don't end up writing each chapter at 2 am while trying not to fall asleep... what do you think about that idea? XD**

* * *

"Shunpike, Marian!"

_Just because I look exactly like my mother and share her name doesn't mean I am her. I don't think I'm a Hufflepuff, anyway._

**That's nice to know.**

_I'm just letting you know that I am my own person. If everyone thinks I'm my mom, they'll assume I wish to be unemployed with 9 kids, but I really want to be a broom designer with no kids._

**Broom designer, huh? Sounds nice.**

_I'll be sure to invent one good enough for Oliver Wood himself!_

**Yes, you do that. How big is he now?**

_He's the most well-known Quidditch player in centuries. Everyone admires him, except for Chudley Cannons fans, every girl fawns over him, except everyone over the age of 40, and all the guys look up to him except my dad._

**So, he's a celebrity...**

_Pretty much._

**I knew he'd go far in the Quidditch career. But this is your sorting, not Oliver Wood's.**

_Yeah, that's true. I don't really have anything to say about myself, so just do your thing._

**You seem to be an odd combination of ambitious and modest.**

_Odd?_

**Well, unusual, I suppose. You could be in Slytherin, or perhaps Hufflepuff.**

_Slytherin. I don't want to look like I'm just following my mother, if I'm going to have a great future I must be my own person._

**Well said.**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: I just realized that since it's April, that means that a year ago was when I read one of the best fanfics on the site. (It's called Prongslet.) And it still hasn't been updated! Grr. XD It seems like all of the best fics are either abandoned or written by very busy people who can rarely update. :P**


	166. Alison Shunpike

**A/N: Since it's after midnight right now, happy Easter. :) It's time for yet another Shunpike... I think the parents were truly in love. XD Or perhaps they just have a physical relationship... anyway...**

* * *

"Shunpike, Alison!"

_Can we just get this over with? I'm hungry._

**Considering you haven't eaten since breakfast, I'm not surprised.**

_Oh, are you a Legilimens? That's cool! I've always wanted to be one. Do you know where I can learn?_

**Yes, yes, that's nice, and no.**

_That's too bad. Oh, I can practically taste the treacle tart..._

**I suppose we'd better hurry this up, then.**

_Yeah._

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

* * *

**A/N: Nobody's guessed the final sorting yet... and I intend to keep it that way! :) So that means no hints. Mwahahaha. :P**


	167. Emerald Shunpike

**A/N: Wow, I'm updating before midnight for once! XD It's only because I know that if I don't do it now, I won't do it at all. I got Pokemon White for Easter (just what I wanted :) ), and I've been playing it nonstop all day. :P I'm just about to challenge Burgh, the leader of the Castelia City gym... and that city is huge!**

**Anyway, I had a good Easter, so I hope you all did too. :) Now on to the story...**

* * *

"Shunpike, Emerald!"

**How many Shunpikes have I sorted...? It feels like a thousand.**

_Considering we were a pure-blood family until Dad married Mum, it very well might have been._

**I was just talking about those of you from the 21st century, but okay.**

_I'm only the 6th this century._

**Only... ha.**

_Don't you know that Moo forbids sarcasm?_

**Moo? Do you mean to say you believe in the milk god?**

_Of course I do!_

**Oh no... I thought that was over when I sorted Dennis Creevey years ago, but I guess not.**

_I don't obsess over it, I was just over my younger friend's house one day and her dad introduced me to the religion. I was born for it!_

**Sure...**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: As for why he's not sick of the milk god from all the Creevey kids, it's because the oldest Creevey started at Hogwarts the same year as the second youngest Shunpike, so there's still a few Shunpikes left until the milkists come.**

**So far, nobody's guessed the final sorting... well, I'm off to kick some bug Pokemon's butts! XD**


	168. Walliam Shunpike

**A/N: I'm updating before midnight again... I'm on a role! ...I probably just jinxed myself. XD**

* * *

"Shunpike, Walliam!"

_I'm really excited for all of this._

**Of course you are, everyone is.**

**No, I'm really excited. I'm going to finally learn the ways of magic! And after that, I can become the most powerful wizard the world has ever seen...**

_That's quite an ambition._

**Don't we all dream big?**

_I suppose so. Either way, your huge goals for the future mean you can only be in one house._

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

_Wait- what? Well... I guess it makes sense._

* * *

**A/N: Yes, the Shunpikes did have another guy. :P So maybe he was a little overdue. XD Anyway, I am still not giving any hints about the final sorting, and I'm thinking I should stop mentioning it before I break my own promise...**


	169. Andrew Shunpike

**A/N: I'm still keeping this new update schedule up! Honestly, I'm amazed. XD Especially now that I'm reaching the climax of Pokemon White... yeah, I got pretty far for just 3 days of playing, didn't I? :P (Especially considering that it took me two years to beat Diamond, and now, three years after that, most of my Pokemon have leveled up just once or twice...)**

* * *

"Shunpike, Andrew!"

**I must ask you just one thing before sorting you.**

_Um... okay?_

**I'll just be blunt. Do you think your older brother is going to become evil?**

_Which one?_

**The younger one... Walliam...**

_He's already evil! He steals my limited edition red wireless Logitech mouse all the time!_

**I don't think you know what evil means.**

_Of course I do! I'm not stupid!_

**I never said you were.**

_Well, you meant it._

**No, I didn't.**

_You did!_

**I'm not even going there.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

* * *

**A/N: I don't know what Walliam (who has a weird name, by the way) would want with a wireless mouse, but I had to come up with something and a computer mouse is right beside me. XD So, in case you were wondering, I never really decided on whether or not Walliam is evil, and someone brought it up in a review. All I came up with for him is that on the train, he made friends with some guys in his year (such as James Potter the second), but then they stopped being his friends after he was put in Slytherin. Then his younger brother, who will be sorted next, came along and they found out that he was evil, not Walliam. Whether or not they go back to him will never be decided. :P So if you want, he can be evil, or he could just get a happy ending.**

**I think this author's note is longer than the actual chapter... it looks that way on Libreoffice.**


	170. Malcolm Shunpike

**A/N: I know I should probably stop saying the same thing constantly, but the fact that I'm keeping up this new updating schedule still amazes me. XD And this time it's even before 11:00!**

**So, this is the last Shunpike. Already! Wow. It feels like I just started sorting them! (Just like this day felt like it was only three hours long...) So if you count this chapter, just 4 chapters left. Can you believe it? I'm thinking after this, I should either write a bunch of oneshots instead of another multichapter fic or write another multichapter fic- only this time, with an actual plot for the first time since February 2011, right before I started this...**

**Now that I've written another huge rant in an author's note, I suppose I should go ahead and start writing.**

* * *

"Shunpike, Malcolm!"

_Whatever you do, just don't put me in Slytherin._

**Does that mean you want to be in Gryffindor?**

_Heck no, I just don't want to be a stereotype._

**The only place you'd be free of the house stereotypes is the Muggle world.**

_I know that. But with a stereotype for evil, my plans would all be ruined._

**...Plans? That sounds rather foreboding.**

_Don't expect me to elaborate. I just have some plans for my future that require carefulness and thinking._

**Sounds ambitious and cunning to me...**

_I am not a Slytherin. You will not place me in Slytherin._

**You've got a lot to learn if you're going to be some sort of evil mastermind.**

_When did I say I was planning to be an evil mastermind?_

**It was implied.**

_I did not imply anything._

**Sure... now, if you don't elaborate a bit on your plans, I am going to have to place you in Slytherin.**

_You wouldn't._

_**SLY-**_

_Wait! I'll tell you!_

**Thank you.**

_No thanks to you._

**What are you planning? We need to hurry up; my change of heart probably confused the others.**

_True. I am planning to do something which I am certain you do not need to-_

**Just get to the point.**

_It's rude to interrupt people, you know. I plan to achieve this something by using vast knowledge to-_

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

**Happy?**

_Quite._

* * *

**A/N: ...I _just _realized why I made the youngest of 9 be smart and awesome. It was my subconscious self telling me to base a character on Noah from Total Drama (he's not evil, but he is the youngest of 9 siblings, insanely smart, and I think was originally intended to be the mastermind of the show instead of just Heather)... and speaking of one of my favorite fandoms, the Canadian finale of the 4th season airs tomorrow night, meaning it should be on Youtube Friday. I can't wait for Lightning to win. :)**

**Anyway, in case you were wondering if he was truly evil or whatever, he is intended to be evilish. Not fully evil because he's 11, but he could totally be the next Dark Lord! After all, the magical world isn't quite as exciting without all of the action. :)**

**And now... the Shunpikes are over. :O I'll miss them. Kind of.**


	171. Gianna Davies

**A/N: We're so close to the end... it's so strange! :P So, if there's anyone you really want to see sorted, NextGen or not, just let me know and maybe I'll drag this on even longer. So far I just have 3 people left...**

**Next we have the kids of Roger Davies... the Ravenclaw Quidditch captian... and his random wife, Janille. Just their two kids, my surprise ending, and then the end! :O**

* * *

"Davies, Gianna!"

_Both of my parents had super quick sortings, they said, so you probably don't know anything about me._

**What makes you think that?**

_I just said why._

**Okay, I'll go there.**

_Where?_

**You think the Quidditch league needs to be reformed, so it is your greatest dream to become, as you like to word it, 'the person in charge' of all Quidditch-related stuff so that you can completely change the sport.**

_Who told you that?_

**Your mind.**

_...I'm glad I'm not planning world domination._

**You should be.**

_Can you stop being creepy?_

**Fine...**

_**SLYTHERIN!**_

* * *

**A/N: Oh, and in case you have no idea what you're reading but simply saw it on your Alerts list or email or whatever, this is still The Sorting Hat Adventures and I am still Ferretess/Palletshipping is Life/whatever else you might think of me as. I just changed my username, profile, and avatar... but last time I checked, the avatar still hadn't changed. :P**

**Again, anyone you want to see sorted, let me know in a review or pm immediately! (Preferably review.)**


	172. Martina Davies

**A/N: I suppose I should go ahead and say, just to clear things up, that unless I start to miss this story so much that it pains me and I need to continue it, I will not be sorting the 3rd Generation... even though I'll admit to already having paired up all the NextGen kids, except for a few who remained single. I would give you some of the funnier ones, but they're all on my old computer and I don't feel like turning it on. XD And speaking of computers, I just have to completely change the subject and say that I've discovered this website where you can play hacked Pokemon games... it's pretty awesome. :) (Unfortunately, I haven't found Cursed Black yet...)**

**Anyway, I'm going to try to decide which requests to do, because some of them are really out there, so... I'll go ahead and decide now.**

**I was considering the 4 house ghosts (minus Sir Nick since I've already sorted him), but the Sorting Hat wasn't even around (well, it was, but it was inanimate), so The Gray Lady and The Bloody Baron couldn't be sorted. And the Fat Friar... well, I don't even have a name...**

**As for Sir Cadogan... well... was he ever even real, or just a painted imaginary person? I don't think it ever said in the book, and HP Wiki has nothing about it. So I think I'll be skipping him.**

**And an AU with Ariana Dumbledore actually attending Hogwarts... hm... that sounds pretty good, actually. So I'll be uploading two chapters tonight. (You probably thought giving me requests would make the story take longer, huh? :) Well, it would have if there were more than 5 characters.)**

**This author's note is way too long... 294 words and growing. Any other characters who were requested but not addressed in this author's note were already sorted- I had to look them all up, though. XD**

* * *

"Davies, Martina!"

_I just don't understand... oh, right, you can hear me, can't you?_

**Yes, I can. What don't you understand?**

_Um..._

**Ah, I see.**

_What?_

**I'm a Legilimens. So, you don't understand why the ceiling is the way it is?**

_The Great Hall ceiling... yeah... how is it possible?_

**I have no idea. I'd suggest you read 'Hogwarts: A History'.**

_Ooh, I've always wanted to read that, but copies are scarce nowadays, as it's considered out of date._

**That's too bad, I'm sure... no, I'd best not say that.**

_Say what?_

**Fine, I'll tell you. I'm sure Hermione Granger spent many nights crying herself to sleep over it.**

_Who?_

**What a wonderful joke, wasted!**

_Sorry, but I don't know who she is. Unless you're talking about the Muggle across the street from me named Herman?_

**No, I wasn't talking about him.**

_I didn't think so._

**Since you seem inquisitive, I know just the place for you.**

_**RAVENCLAW!**_

_Yay!_

* * *

**A/N: And now we have another chapter! I don't think I've posted multiple chapters at once since... um... maybe that one time I took a week or two off from writing last July? Or maybe the first day I wrote this when I uploaded 15 chapters at once or something like that? I have no idea. XD**


	173. Ariana Dumbledore

**A/N: And we have another chapter! :) ...Oh no, if I don't upload this really soon I'm going to break my before-midnight streak! :O**

* * *

"Dumbledore, Ariana!"

_Hello. I'm so very excited to be here at Hogwarts!_

**I'm sure you are, many people are at the beginning.**

_Ooh, Albus was right, you are just like a human with speech!_

**Well... thank you.**

_Oh, sorry if that was awkward. I tend to say the most odd things..._

**It's not a problem at all.**

_That's a relief. I know you know best, but if I may, a bit of advice?_

**Sure.**

_I think I belong in Hufflepuff. I am very loyal to my family, I love them all so dearly, and the new friends I met on the train seem like such wonderful people. After all, I'm not brave, smart, or cunning, so all signs point to Hufflepuff._

**Hm... yes, you would do well in Hufflepuff. However, I feel there's something else in you.**

_Oh?_

**Yes, there is bravery in you. You aren't aware of it, but if things work out correctly, you will undoubtedly live up to your sorting.**

_**GRYFFINDOR!**_

_Oh my... I... I can't believe it!_

**Well, go sit at the Gryffindor table!**

* * *

**A/N: She's pretty fun to write, actually. :) I'm glad I chose to sort her... and this was requested by ashu711. So, this is it. The second to last chapter. If I said it ended Sunday (I think I once did), I counted wrong or something, because this ends Saturday... as in, April 14th, 2012. It'll be today when you read this, but technically it's 11:54 p.m. on Friday right now. So, any last guesses for the final sorting? I personally can't wait! :D**


	174. The End

**A/N: ...Yeah, this is totally not getting out before midnight. XD Oh well. Anyway, this is the end... today is a big day for endings! I'm finishing this story and I beat Pokemon White, reaching my goal of beating it in less than a week. :) So, you've all been wondering what the surprise ending is... I'm still not telling you! You'll just have to wait until she gets sorted to find out who it is. And since this is not someone who would actually be sorted (aka a Muggle... and not just any ordinary Muggle!) this is not going to take place in the Great Hall.**

**Here we go!**

* * *

_This is simply unbelievable... I suppose I'll have to believe in magic now, won't I?_

**Yes, indeed you will.**

_I always did, deep inside of me, in a way. I had just never imagined that my own creation could come to life..._

**Magic is a wonderful thing, isn't it?**

_It sure is! Now I can truly experience the joy felt by Harry, Hermione, Ron, and all the others. I am much too old to be attending Hogwarts, but to be able to experience such a thing is phenomonal._

**Truly, it is. But we seem to be just repeating ourselves.**

_Oh, goodness, you're right! Well, since I made you, I already know where I'll be sorted._

**Where, then?**

_Hufflepuff, of course._

**Oh, I don't know. I see great potential for Slytherin as well. You can be quite cunning when you want to be...**

_Really? You think so?_

**Yes, I do.**

_Hm... but I couldn't be a Slytherin. I portrayed them as evil, since of course it was from Harry's perspective. In my mind, after all that writing, it's hard not to think of them as evil gits._

**I suppose so. Maybe you should meet a few Slytherins.**

_I'm sure I have, they're a quarter of the world after all._

**According to Pottermore, it's a smaller fraction than that.**

_True, true._

**Well, I suppose we'd best get this over with, unless you have something else to say.**

_No, not really._

**Well, although it's not necessary to yell since we aren't in the Great Hall, just for the authenticity...**

_**HUFFLEPUFF!**_

* * *

**A/N: Yep, it was J.K. Rowling! :) Totally AU, but most of you never would have guessed! Oh, and I'm aware that this probably breaks ff's rules, but whatever. The only other options for an ending were a normal character or... I don't even know what else.**

**Anyway. I've said this a hundred times in the form of 'I can't believe this is ending!' but... I can't believe this is over! What am I going to do now? (Okay, that was a rhetorical question.) And the song I'm listening to says 'I don't want this moment to ever end." How fitting! :) (It's With Me by Sum 41, by the way.)**

**Well, now that this is over... I probably won't be writing for Harry Potter for a while. It's pretty much all I've ever written for minus some Total Drama oneshots, so I guess it is what I'm known for, it's just that I don't have much inspiration left. I have plenty of ideas, sure, but I don't want to write them anytime soon because they all involve various retellings of the books or too many characters or something like that. But trust me, if I ever get ideas, I'll write them. Maybe I'll try to write a bunch of oneshots instead of picking up another multichapter...**

**Those of you who read Who Would Win in a Duel or Who is Your Favorite are probably expecting me to say 'I'll probably update this someday in the future'... but I'm not going to say that. I feel that this is a great ending, and adding another random character to the end would ruin the effect. Plus, 174 chapters is probably enough. I've never seen a fanfic besides mine longer than 110 chapters...**

**So, yeah, this is it. And I know I'm really dragging this ending out, but I have been writing this for over a year, you know. I started it back in February 2011, when I didn't even know how to write! (In my opinion, anyway...)**

**I guess this is the time to come up with a witty parting word!**

**...Um...**

**_Fin._**


End file.
